Frump to Fab - A Whole New World.

savingfortomorrow

purplepixie- what a great idea for your grandson. it will show him how to get smarter with cash. it might show him how much can be recouped from unwanted stuff. he might be open to buying stuff from ebay and saving money.

I am tired today the muscles in my shoulders are sore- i swam 6 days this week and the motivation was waning this morning- so I put on my brightest and most joyful suit to get some motivation going. It sounds silly but it is my only outlet for the zany fashion. You have to do what you need to motivate yourself. 

i might to some ti chi or barre exercises later to improve the muscles. 

I use an app to montior what is in the cupboards and fridge and freezer. I try and keep it somewhat updated. It can be useful. 

FreetodoasIlike

Thanks to everyone who sent their good wishes about my accident.  I feel SO sore today - I’m bruised down my left side and  have minor cuts on my arms and legs.  It was the shock more than anything.

I feel for those who have been bereaved as it must be hard to lose a much cherished loved one.  People have made reference to my OH as my husband.  We met through work when I was 25 and he had just turned 40.  We were both going through divorces which neither of us was the guilty partner. Neither of us were looking for a new relationship as were were so raw at the time.  I was only married just over two years but as he was violent twice, I vowed it would never happen a third time and when it inevitably did, I left.  Yes, it was very hard at first as I moved back with my mum for nearly a year and OH stayed with a friend whilst we saved for a deposit.  We eventually moved into our small bungalow (which we are still living in) in 1982.  We’ve done a lot to it over the years (including a loft conversion) and we’re very happy.  I suppose we could have moved over the years and then down-sized later and would have gained from the capital raised in house moves but to be honest it just didn’t occur to us.  Interest rates were so high in the 1980s and I remember them going up nearly every two or three months or so at one time.  We have now been together nearly 40 years (I am 64 and OH has just turned 79).  We didn’t have any children together and never married but OH has three daughters (the eldest being just 10 years younger than me and we are more like close friends than step-mum and daughter). The girls have always been a huge part of our lives and we are very close and now I am an honorary “step mum” to four lovely grandchildren who visit often. Their mother’s partner (whom she left my OH for) sadly died not long after they met and she has had several partners over the years but they didn’t work our for her.  She is very happy on her own now and lives comfortably in what was the family home which my OH didn’t stake a claim on when they divorced. I don’t see her often but when we meet up at family gatherings we are always polite and civil to each other. We even exchange bottles of wine at Christmas!

 So, my OH is not technically my “husband” but if we can manage to stay together all this time I suppose we’ve lasted a lot longer than a lot of marriages! We have certainly had our ups and downs.  OH had a heart attack five years ago and has just recently been in hospital for a prostrate operation.  Thankfully all is well now and we just take it one day at a time and are thankful for what we have.

Sheila. I am sorry to that you are having a few bad days - it must be very hard for you.  I hope you feel a bit better soon.  It is still very raw for you and some days will be better than others.

LL Forgive me if this is an impertinent question, and tell me to mind my own business if it is. You say you have been bereaved for six years and have been slowly coming to terms with your grief but have you ever thought of looking for another partner?  I know no-one could ever replace your husband but have you thought of looking for companionship?  I know you have family and live a very full life so this may not be something you would ever consider.  For context, my friend, who is 80, lost her husband many years ago and about eight years ago met someone in the sheltered housing unit where she lives.  They both are very independent and have kept their individual flats but have been on many holidays together and enjoy each other’s company.  They will never marry but enjoy the companionship.  My friend even went to Australia a few years ago to visit her partner’s family.  In contrast, I have a younger friend (58) that I’m very close to.  We were work colleagues for 17 years and still keep in touch for coffee/long walks/meals out etc.).  She is quite glamorous and was pursued by many men after her divorce about 10 years ago.  She went through a hell of a time as her ex was horrible and it cost her a lot of money (hiring barristers as well as solicitors) to finally finalise the divorce.  She ended up with the lion’s share of the joint property and has built her own house with the proceeds.  She is having a great time socialising/cruising but said she would NEVER marry again.  I couldn’t possibly fund her lifestyle (not that I would want to) but I suppose everyone is different and it’s horses for courses.

Sorry this is long!  I am lying on the sofa with all my bones aching and seem to be reflecting on life at the moment🤫

Sugar  How was the party?  It sounded fab.  Did you have a good time?  Come on, tell us all about it. I love hearing about a good party😁

FreetodoasIlike

The broken shower door!! Just about cleared all the glass in the bathroom.

helensbiggestfan

Glad you had such a great  time at the party. SUgarbaby.  Saw your photo on the champagne thread.  You looked fab.  

FTD. that was such a close shave, it doesn't bear thinking about.  Take it easy, I'm sure it will take a good few days yet for the bruising to come out and The soreness to ease off.  

Re finding a new man........I'm not offended at all.  My maxim is never say never.  But where does one go "shopping" for a new partner. 😂. 

A little while back there was the saga of the two Johns I met on holiday. Both were quite nice but somehow they didn't quite make the grade.  I think I'm just a fussy madam.  😂. Who knows maybe there's John 3 out there somewhere.  

I did try my hand at internet dating 😱😂.  A couple of friends have met lovely partners that way, maybe I should give it another go.  

Candys mum had a brilliant saying......that after a certain age men seem to be looking for either a nurse or a purse.  From talking to some of my friends who are now going solo and listening to their dating experiences I think she might have a point.  

In all seriousness though, without putting my husband on a pedestal because of course he had faults, he could be a right cantankerous old devil when the mood hit him, I have to say he would be a hard act to follow.  So far I've not met anyone who comes anywhere near the high standards he set.  And, I know this sounds conceited, but I'm not someone who could settle for second best.  I'm afraid I'm an all or nothing kind of gal.  

I await the thunderbolt......🤪

I met my husband when I least expected to meet anyone (I was already seeing someone). He just stormed into my life like a whirlwind. Resistance was futile - (his name was Bob and I christened him "Hurricane Bob", much to his amusement but all his friends said it was very apt)   

I know it will probably never happen that way again but it was so exciting.... And I guess part of me would like the thrill of being swept off my feet again, incurable romantic that I am.  🤣

sugarbaby125

Hello Ladies, 



Free, I had an absolutely fantastic time at the party. I danced the night away, had good food to eat and I only drank bottled water. My favourite tipple even at a party. 

I am wearing a winter white M & S skirt and a  cream coast top as all of my white skirts are size 16 and were too tight and this size 18 skirt was nice and lose on me, so very comfortable to dance in.  The man holding the party had asked us all to wear white if possible, so most people wore white, but some people wore what colour they preferred to wear. 

I did make the effort to make up my eyes and also to layer my red door perfume with the matching shower gel, body lotion and body powder. I painted my toenails with a purple nail polish even though they were not going to be on show. 

I was by far the oldest woman at the party. Most of the women were in their twenties or early thirties as were the men. I was only surprised because the man having the party is a DJ I have known for over 10 years and he is slightly older than I am. 

I was also the fattest person at the party by far, but I was clean and tidy and I had made the best of myself, so I never let it make me feel uncomfortable.   I was the best dancer at the party so I was not too surprised at being complimented on my dancing by one of the other women at the party.  

I had to ask a girl with a smartphone to look up the address for me, as when I got off the bus, I was unsure where to go. Luckily I only had a 5 minute walk to the address. The young woman said 'you look lovely, where are you going?' When I thanked her for the compliment and told her I was going to a party she said 'I hope you have a good time' It was great that a stranger was not only helpful, but also took the time to be complimentary. 

candygirl

Omg talking about a nurse or a purse!! Mum's friend met a bloke on a cruise in Jan, weirdly enough called John !! He moved in with her during lockdown, rented his house out to his Daughter  n family , n all seemed to be going very fast but seemingly well.
This week She went out for the day,  n when She came back he'd got rid of all her lovely modern furniture, n curtains, n replaced them with tat that him n his late wife had had for years!! She's so upset that he's taking too much control already, but always has to have a man in the frame 🙄🙄
I just couldn't be arsed 😂😂😂

savingfortomorrow

oh candygirl- that is scary! He is trying to recreate the old life, I imagine he will make her dress like the old wife soon. The furniture being tossed out is a massive issue. 
It's easier to be alone than living in the shadow of "Rebecca".  

helensbiggestfan

Good Lord......the man sounds like a psycho.  Hope she can get rid of him, pronto.  

FreetodoasIlike

That sounds horrendous candygirl. I hope she shows him the door soon.  Sugar - You look amazing!  I’m glad you had such a fantastic time.  I’m not surprised that the younger ones were impressed by your dancing. I’m slightly older than you but we sure knew how to strut our stuff in the 70s and 80s!

Talking about cruises, the friend I mentioned previously has been on several cruises.  She mainly goes with her family (parents/sister and her husband, their three girls and my friend’s two adult sons).  On one occasion she went with her family, her two adult sons, one with his girlfriend.  My friend never expects to meet anyone on these trips as there are mostly couples but on one occasion she dressed up to the nines for dinner and then after that went into the casino to get a drink.  When she got there she saw that her eldest son (about 25 - the one without the girlfriend) was talking to an older man in his fifties.  She sat at the bar and waved across to her son. The man widened his eyes and thought she was waving at him.  He said something along the lines to her son “what a gorgeous gal, I think she’s waving at me.  I think I’ll go across and ask to buy her a drink.” Her son replied “that’s my mum.”  The man looking embarrassed replied “That’s your mom?” (He was Canadian, hence saying “mom” rather than mum.  “She sure is some gorgeous lady”.  Her son laughed and offered to introduce him to her.  My friend was reluctant at first but thought ‘what the the heck’ and had a drink with him and spent the rest of the cruise in his company.  It never came to anything but she certainly had a great time!  Her son stills laughs when she tells the story.

chanie

Hi fabbers,

I have been lurking for a few days and have just caught up with the thread.  I’ve had a busy couple of weeks as it was DDs birthday.  Then, the children returned to school and I had lots to prepare for that.  It’s also my birthday coming up this week and I don’t really have any ideas as to what to do.