Daughter wants to change her surname...

burnsguitarman

My son is now an adult, but when he was 3 my husband left us. I later married again, and although my son had some contact with his father, by his choice he has always called my new husband "dad". When he was at school I told them the situation and asked that they call him by his new surname. (My ex did agree to this probably because he thought he could shirk his responsibilities, rather than make things easier for us) Anyway a few years later I had to get him a passport. I spoke to the passport office and was told that his passport would Have to be in his new surname as this was the name he was known by, and that they would put a note on one of the pages to show his original birth name. We have never had a problem even though the change was never done officially, even his national number automatically came in his new name. Having said all this, I still think I changed his name primarily for my benefit though, as I wanted his name to be the same as mine, and not of my ex's new wife.. I was very very hurt at the time! Maybe you should take some time and wait longer before doing anything.

Strapped

~evanesco~ wrote: »

Thank you for your comments, it is extremely hard for me to keep trying to foster their relationship, something I have tried to do since we split, I have always made it clear to him he can hace access to her whenever he wants, I have insisted on 3 times a week etc, however, at any point has she decided she doesn't want to go, for any reason I haven't pushed her to go, like I have said I believe in giving her the opporunity to make her own choices.

Oh boy, are you heading for trouble by the time she's a teenager

Zara33

~evanesco~ wrote: »

Fair point, expect she is an exceptional 7yo, more on par with a 10yo. She's is of very high intelligence and we have had many discussions on why she want's to do this.

Perhaps it would be of some benefit if your child would wait a few years, we all know what kids are like they chop and change their mind all the times.

black-saturn

I changed both of my daughters surnames through a solcitor by deed poll. It cost £50 each. I was told I had to make a public announcement about it so I put an advert in the personal column something along the lines of "as of (whatever date) Jo Bloggs will be known as Jo Biggs". Then I wrote to the school, doctor, dentist etc etc informing them of the change.

Random

No offence intended to any of the previous posters, but if I were you I'd ask Citizens Advice about it, they are likely to know the legal ins and outs.

About 9 years ago now, I wanted to change my son's surname, so I approached Citizen's Advice. They told me that it wasn't necessary to do it by deed poll, all I needed was a declaration (I forget the name of it, though of course it is in the house somewhere!). They sent me one with the details all filled in already, and all I needed to do was get it witnessed by a solicitor (cost me £5). Basically it declared that from that point on I was going to call him by name x, and was totally renouncing name y. Whenever I send his birth certificate, I send a copy of the declaration with it, and this was fine for passports, National Health cards, schools, bank accounts etc.

black-saturn

You can do a declaration if you want it to be unofficial. If you want passports to be changed and everything official you have to do it by deed poll. With an unofficial declaration you can call yourself whatever you want

~evanesco~

Strapped wrote: »

Oh boy, are you heading for trouble by the time she's a teenager

That's probably true, but without giving her the opportunity to make her own mistakes, I don't think she'll cope very well in this world. I can't protect her from everything, only offer her my guidance and give her my best advice. I believe in setting boundaries and sticking by them, she can make her own choices within them, and upto now I have a very well-balanced child.

ariba10

Any adult can change their surname by just letting it be known that from now on they wish to known as ***** .

There is no need for any legal action as long as they do not do it with the intention of fraud or for anything illegal.

smartie12

My DS asked to have his surname changed to my surname when he was 9, after not seeing his father for 2 years. We didn't need his permission.

I wish i'd done it sooner.

haylibo

My surname was changed by my mum and stepdad as a child. The name you are 'known as' is your official name. If you are registered with agencies such as NHS, school etc as a paticular name then that IS your name. The name on your birth certificate is redundant unless you officially reinstate it by changing all records. It is similar when you marry, there is no legal element to a marriage which relates to changing your name, it is something you choose to do and you simply write to all concerned explaining the change, it isn't that you are masquarading under your married name. You can only have one name. No need for deed poll.