Aspergers/ASD support thread

Savvy_Sue

kabie wrote:

Blue Bottle Mystery : An Asperger Adventure
by Kathy Hoopmann

Think that must be the one you mean?

Yup, that's the one. And she seems to have written a few others which I haven't read - I'd say the Blue Bottle one is excellent for primary age, and our son was 12 before tentatively diagnosed!

kabie wrote:

I thought he was a pretty regular child.

I think it's harder with your first: I mean I didn't think mine was particularly 'normal', but then I didn't have anything except the offspring of friends to compare him with. And their offspring didn't have my son's parents! :rotfl:

I think it gets a little easier when you have a better idea what's 'wrong'. I'd stress that my son's AS is mild, to the point where he could now pass for 'normal', as long as you don't expect him to be a 'normal' teenager, ie into music, football trendy clothes, and girls.

I suspect the nursery suspected something like AS, but as I said, he was 12 before school doctor said "I think he may have AS." The relief which washed over me! The battles we'd had - it all made sense now. And realising that his inability to express or - apparently - accept love was not a personal snub, but just that, an inability, a lack of comprehension.

On the other hand, I think if we'd been told when he was much younger that he had AS, I suspect he'd be less 'normal' now. He managed to learn the 'rules' of polite behaviour, because I insisted he behaved in a certain way: saying sorry, taking turns, not wrecking your brother's Lego models. I realise this might not work with children who are more severely affected. But if I'd been told much earlier that he had AS, I might not have insisted so fiercely on trying to make him behave as I thought a 'normal' child should, if that makes sense.

BTW, I apologise if my use of the word 'normal' offends anyone. I can't think of a better way of phrasing it right now. My expectations of 'normality' are pretty wide, and I think my middle son is also a bit 'odd' but like kabie, other people seem to find him quite acceptable.

halloweenqueen_2

I see something in the daily mail magazine, where a couple of boys hated their socks or the sensation of wearing socks and they called it SID, sensory ....... dysfunction/disorder
I think the I word was isolation. It may give you a few clues if you can look up SID on a US site, they may have some suggestions, I don't really remember too much of the details, so it may be no help at all.

Savvy_Sue

halloweenqueen wrote:

I see something in the daily mail magazine, where a couple of boys hated their socks or the sensation of wearing socks

I was watching Finding Forrester the other day (ah, Sean!) and the young lad asked him why he wore his socks inside out. "The seams are on the wrong side", said Sean. And he's quite right, isn't he? Don't know if that's worth a try for undies with seams.

BTW, I had to cut some labels, not all, out of my son's clothes because they were 'tickly' or 'scratchy'. And I know what he means when he says that! Have had to take a few labels out of my own clothes because they drove me demented!

mrs_drudge

Youngest would not wear trousers for around six months - would go out on the allotment at the end of our garden picking blackberries off the bush dressed in anorak, jumper and wellingtons and nothing else!
He was initially diagnosed with autism - the day I found out I was visiting the osteopath and was so upset I wept all over her! She told me of a trial they were running with autistic children using cranial osteopathy - we managed to get him seen by Stuart Korth - he has clinics in London and Tunbridge Wells.
The treatment really made a difference, and he coped very well at primary school and reasonably well at secondary, although due to bullying refused to go in at all for the last six months before his GCSEs. He still managed to get 5 A - C and enrolled at college.
We were really pleased as we thought that now he was in a small class (only eight of them) and doing a subject he really wanted to do (agriculture) our problems were over. I wish! He still finds it difficult to communicate and only really wants to be left alone - but it seems that this doesnt happen and he has been squirted with worming fluid and then shut in a portaloo while his classmates refused to let him out and then started rocking it over.
Went and spoke to the lecturer who said that the other boys had no malice, but he would talk to them and tell them to leave son alone.
However son is now refusing to go back at all and we are worried sick about how he is going to cope with rest of life! If he could get a job working on a farm he would be fine - he is a hard worker - he just needs to be left alone to get on with the job - but nowadays it seems you need a college qualification just to pick up poo! He is very intelligent too - life is unfair!
:mad:

jb1964

Savvy_Sue wrote:

I was watching Finding Forrester the other day (ah, Sean!) and the young lad asked him why he wore his socks inside out. "The seams are on the wrong side", said Sean. And he's quite right, isn't he? Don't know if that's worth a try for undies with seams.

My daughter is even worse with socks than she is with knickers and everything else. She always wore the socks inside out for exactly the same reason. I know I used to hunt everywhere when she was little for a narrow style sock with no seams - her foot was only a D width and very shallow - nowadays it's not so bad because they don't make socks for older kids so 'fat' (if you know what I mean) in the foot as they do for little ones.

Savvy_Sue

mrs drudge, are Connexions working with your son? If he's under 19, they should be, especially as he has additional needs. Maybe they could get him a work placement or something like that.

mrs_drudge

Thanks Savvysue - I hadn't thought beyond the end of this week - we are going to the States tomorrow and what with it being half term we havent been able to contact the college or do anything sensible!
We will go down that route when we get back.
Liz

Zziggi

A genuinie query...

is (mild) aspergers considered as a (mild) learning difficulty?

Savvy_Sue

Zziggi wrote:

A genuinie query...

is (mild) aspergers considered as a (mild) learning difficulty?

It might be, I suppose, if it causes difficulties with learning? DS wasn't diagnosed until secondary school, and we did talk to the SENCo about the fact that he might need 'guiding' in some subjects. And he did get extra time for his GCSEs, to allow him to work out what the examiner really wanted to know! I mean, some questions are just so STUPID!

Louisepp

Oh my!! I have to say, I've had a most interesting read with this thread. My aspie son wasn't diagnosed until he was 16 and by then it was difficult for him to get any help. Anyway, the clothes business what a complete and utter nightmare! School clothes were fine, but everything else had to have 3 stripes on it

I'm sure that some people who don't know me would think "oh for goodness sake, give him something else and insist he wears it". I think we did sometimes in desperation, but as he got older it became more apparent how terribly uncomfortable he felt in other clothes. It was all 'wrong'. He didn't scream or shout. He would wear them, and change back as soon as possible easy peasy, but the sadness, the not talking, the sobbing, the fear, it just wasn't worth it.

He never agreed that he was Aspergic until he read the Dog in the Night book. His friend bought it for him. He read it one evening and then came down to tell me about it and announced "I have got it haven't I", like he'd caught a cold.

My son is unusual. He is 18 years old, has friends and a job. Says things that make you think uuuuhhhh??? It's good to find other parents of Aspergics.