Aspergers/ASD support thread

PasturesNew

Sometimes my writing may seem dark, perhaps negative. But I just write words that I try to form into coherent sentences in order to try to communicate.

I will occasionally add, as I've said before, I am not unhappy/depressed. I just say things the way I see them. My writings are experiences and facts.

Just thought I'd mention it in case anybody thought I was depressed or anything, which I am not.



Re writing/speaking style of Aspies, I have heard that Aspies are often accused of being negative. This hurts when we are giving our input and are shot down for always being negative. All we are doing is telling it the way we see it. It's just when there's a lot of factual/logical writing/speaking, then those chirpy !!!!!!s think we're being negative

e.g.
Person: Shall we go out?
Aspie: They said on the news it might rain
Person: God, you're always negative, you need to get out more.

When all the Aspie really meant was: they said it might rain, let's look at the forecast, if it's going to rain we need a macintosh or a Plan B so we don't get caught out and drenched.

We don't say the whole thing because ... well, it's obvious what we meant
Logic says you look it up and have a Plan B ready!

Snaggles

Sorry, maybe dark was the wrong choice of word - I didn't mean to imply 'negative' or 'depressed' - I hope you weren't offended.

I find your logical, factual, truthful way of speaking really very appealing, as it reminds me of my son, who I love very very much.

Snaggles

Me again

I've just posted this on my diary but I just wanted to copy it here as well:

I've finally had 'the phonecall'. :eek:

Ryan has officially been diagnosed as having Autism Spectrum Condition, specifically Aspergers Syndrome.

We've waited for so long, so I'm feeling a bit of a strange mix of emotions, but mainly relief.

We have to go to a meeting with them next Monday to discuss the dagnosis (I asked her to tell me over the phone so we could prepare ourselves a bit, but the truth is I don't think I could have taken another week of waiting), and then we will have a much clearer idea of what it means for Ryan in terms of the support he will need etc.

Thanks to everyone who has helped me get through the last few weeks. I still feel fairly sane (as much as I ever was anyway), and that's mainly down to you.

fallen_angel_69

i think i felt relief when both dd were diagnosed at least you knew what you are dealing with so you can get on and try to cope I feel it was not knowing was harder,now you know why things are as they are it easier to find advice and stuff needed. Don't know wheter that makes sense or not it difficult to explain

Snaggles

Yes, it makes perfect sense, thanks. I like to have definite answers, even if the answers are scary. And I think it will help me feel more confident in dealing with his school and asking for support for him.

PasturesNew

Snaggles wrote: »

Sorry, maybe dark was the wrong choice of word - I didn't mean to imply 'negative' or 'depressed' - I hope you weren't offended.

No I wasn't. But it was your use of the word that prompted me to update my posting with the paragraph about sounding negative to others. Just in case others were thinking I might be sounding down.

It is something I have been accused of repeatedly all my life. So it was a relief when I found out this can be an Aspie behaviour as finally I knew why I'd had that problem and can now try to ensure I either balance out my responses, or simply point out it's not negative and not feel !!!!!! for having been picked up on it.

Before I never had a response. I'd take the "you're negative" accusation and it would make me sad as I had no way to move the conversation on to point out it is a practical or realist viewpoint. I can now look perhaps to wording my responses differently. Although I probably won't because I can't and why should I.

Chollita

Well, I have my appointment with the psychologist (I think) tomorrow, that'll be fun in Spanish, hehe! Think I might make some notes tonight to help me remember what I want to say

D&DD

PN you sound a lot like my eldest..The way he talks is so logical and factual.:D
As our respite boy was leaving on Saturday DS1 was having a conversation with him and on his way out he said to me 'spoken like a true Aspie' (His dad,stepdad and brother are all on the spectrum)
I've always thought DS1 was also on the spectrum and as he's got older its definately showing up more and more.It hasn't hindered him *thankfully*in any way but socially he is very immature although he does have friends but he is more routine led and 'everything just so in its place' than DS3 even :eek:

D&DD

:undecided Snaggles I don't know what to say....it's good news as you finally will hopefully get Ryan help at school now, but I know what you mean about you don't really know how you feel....
At least theres something concrete to build on now onwards and upwards hun!!

dk67

Hi all,

I have read this thread with interest and love would some advice and opinions.......

Our 16 year old son has always been 'different' - it sounds such a mean way to explain it, but it is true!

He had a very difficult and prolonged birth with a shoulder presentation, as a baby he needed constant holding, as a toddler he constantly cried and screamed and continued having 'temper tantrums' to raise the roof!

We eventually got referred to CAHMS when he was 11. No diagnosis was given. Again he was rereferred as an urgent case at 14. They refused to allow him to have a Psychiatric assessment.

He is now 16, does not engage at all, has so many 'quirks' and 'obsessive behaviours' - he does not seem to be able to make judgements. He has been excluded from one school last year and may be going the same way with his current school. It has been recommended that he leaves mainstream education but GCSEs are looming.......he rarely attends and says he doesnt like the close contact with others.

I have 4 other children but he is sooo different.

he isolates himself and has no direction. yet he isnt hyperactive, he really seems the opposite.

he doesnt like change and seems to 'take the lead' by copying others when showing emotion.

we have now finally got funding for an assessment at a specialist centre but i feel so sad that his education has been wasted and he is a confused young man..

sorry to burden you all with this long post...