Man trouble advice please :(

kathy206

Hi
You've only been together 7 months, why are you so dependant on him? Why don't you take the time he's at work to see your own friends, you know, do things you want to do? No offence but after such a relatively short period of time you really don't have much of a right to start dictating what hours he works etc.. in fact i think you should be thankful he's not a layabout. I agree with other posters, if you start throwing hissy fits and sticking your bottom lip out he'll run a mile...
It's quite stifling to be with someone in a new relationship who wants to spend every waking minute with you:rolleyes: (been there, done that) IMHO I don't think it's healthy to be spending every free minute with a partner...
Like I say no offence meant... but to quote another poster... you did ask
Ring him tomorrow (when he's had chance to wake up) and just apologise.
Hope all goes wellxx

JennyW_2

kathy206 wrote: »

Hi
You've only been together 7 months, why are you so dependant on him? Why don't you take the time he's at work to see your own friends, you know, do things you want to do? No offence but after such a relatively short period of time you really don't have much of a right to start dictating what hours he works etc.. in fact i think you should be thankful he's not a layabout. I agree with other posters, if you start throwing hissy fits and sticking your bottom lip out he'll run a mile...
It's quite stifling to be with someone in a new relationship who wants to spend every waking minute with you:rolleyes: (been there, done that) IMHO I don't think it's healthy to be spending every free minute with a partner...
Like I say no offence meant... but to quote another poster... you did ask
Ring him tomorrow (when he's had chance to wake up) and just apologise.
Hope all goes wellxx

I agree, I think you need to get a life and fill it with things other than your boyfriend.

Try having a husband in the armed forces not knowing from one week to the next when you'll see each other

ceegee

Stephb1986 wrote: »

what should i do

Grow up and start behaving in a mature manner. He is not your "property" and you cannot expect him to dance to your tune. He is not a puppet on a string. Also, you must realise that life does not revolve around you. If your head is being "done in" by him working nights for a month and also working on Saturday, the heaven help you if any real problems come along!

Honestly, your clingy behaviour will drive him away.....men don't like it.

Just phone him up, quickly apologise for your recent behaviour and start being more positive and understanding.


(.....and no more "yes, buts....." from you. I want to hear something positive, rather than a whinge.):cool:


There.... I hope that was a satisfactory kick up the backside!!

Stephb1986_2

i tried ringing him this morning he didnt answer ive txt him but no reply lucky ive already finished work and he finishes at half 1 so i'll go round and see him. I know im sort of being selfish and i know he has to work but if he had money trouble he should come to me and he knows that ive just got 75k its not like im short of cash. I know i was childish by havin a mini tantrum about him working but ignoring me for nearly 2 days is a hell of alot more childish dont you think?? im not trying to take the blame off me but im the one thats trying to make up and he's just not replying or answering.

Stephb xx

reehsetin

maybe he's just leaving you to chill out and get some perspective before he talks to you

JennyW_2

If he has financial issues then he may prefer to sort them out himself.

He may even be working these hours so he doesn't have to put up with your whining!

Stephb1986_2

i dont whinge to be honest i just sit there quiet. sometimes i wish i didnt love him as much as i do ive not slept for 2 days ive not eaten i think i've really stuffed up this time i just want to hug him

screenmaster

Maybe he feel threatened by the goldfish

snipzychick

As you have tried calling and texting already, and received no reply. I think maybe you should give him some space, and wait until he contacts you. Men don't generally appreciate it when you play games with them in my experience. If he really loves you he'll contact you.

Jo_R_2

It sounds like you took him working as a personal insult. People generally need to work, you know? It's what he did before he met you and what he will continue to do. He's his own person, you aren't attached. You are a couple, but that doesn't mean you need to spend every minute of your free time together.

Trust me on this, relying on a partner for your social life is not good. It's completely understandable you want to spend lots of time with him, but what is infinitely more attractive to a man (or woman, if situation were reversed) is someone who is self-serving, confident, and has things going on for them. Someone being available 24/7 takes away the appeal. Honestly, not seeing him for a few evenings is nothing in the scheme of things, I know it's hard, but what you need to do is book a few evenings in/out with the girls, go away for the weekend, things you used to do before you met him. He'll see you going places, seeing people and want to spend time with someone who has an interesting life and wants him to be a part of it.

Another thing - don't always read too much into things men do. I am guilty at times of analysing things to death, examining every little thing that someone says/does and assuming that because what they have said/done makes me feel someone has done something for a reason, I assume that is why they have done it. Like, in the past, I have thought that because a boyfriend wanted to go out to the pub with his mates instead of seeing me, that it meant he didn't want to see me. No. It just means he wants to meet his friends for a drink. It's no reflection on you - but if you carry on, it may well be!

And playing games is not good when you've been together seven months... As has been said, he might just be having some psace and giving you space to calm down. Leave him be for a while.