Renting a Room when you are gay

AdrianC

It would be illegal for the landlord to discriminate on the basis of your sexuality. That simple.

Of course, you also want to live somewhere you're comfortable, and this is a much subtler question in a shared house...

I'm trying to think how best to phrase this... Is your sexuality something that people would be likely to guess when they meet you, without it being explicitly stated?

theartfullodger

ancientofdays wrote: »

About 40 years ago, we let a room to a female lodger. She was hay, there was no issue for us.

Make hay while the sun shines, eh?

Discrimination against gays is exactly as illegal as discrimination against the straight:. Or any of the other varieties.

Good luck, hope things work out.

Slithery

AdrianC wrote: »

I'm trying to think how best to phrase this... Is your sexuality something that people would be likely to guess when they meet you, without it being explicitly stated?

You put that much better than me, I was going to suggest turning up for viewings dressed as one of the YMCA

AdrianC

Slithery wrote: »

You put that much better than me, I was going to suggest turning up for viewings dressed as one of the YMCA

I was actually thinking from the other direction...

If it's easily guessable, then don't mention it.
Otherwise, casually mention "my boyfriend" as part of the conversation - and no more than that.

Let the landlord's reaction guide you.

davidmcn

theartfullodger wrote: »

Discrimination against gays is exactly as illegal as discrimination against the straight:. Or any of the other varieties.

True, insofar as homo/hetero/bi are equally protected where discrimination is unlawful - but lodgers are an exemption from the Equality Act.

AdrianC

davidmcn wrote: »

True, insofar as homo/hetero/bi are equally protected where discrimination is unlawful - but lodgers are an exemption from the Equality Act.

Are you sure about that?

You're not thinking of whether or not "reasonable adjustments" for people with disabilities are required? Age and marital status are also exempted from part 4 of the act, covering premises, but that's it.

https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/2010/15/part/4

silvercar

I'm not sure how people renting out a room handle this, generally? Do they rent out the room with a single bed, in which case I guess they are giving a message that overnight visitors are unwelcome? Or do they have a double bed, but rent the room to couples, in which case they'll want to meet both partners before signing the lodger agreement?

I was discussing this with a letting agent that specialises in HMOs. He said 4 foot beds are ideal. Wide enough for overnight guests, but narrow enough they don't become a regular fixture.

Honeylife

GDB2222 wrote: »

I think the big question is whether you plan to bring your partner back to your room? The owners are renting the room to you, they'll have met you, and they'll have decided that they are happy enough having you in their home. If suddenly they discover a complete stranger in the house one morning, because you've brought your partner back for the night, that's a potential problem.

It's clear that you need to establish the ground rules very clearly before moving in, but I really don't think you need to start the conversation with a statement about your sexuality. It's a bit OTT to do that. The ground rules would cover lots of things, such as cooking very fragrant foods, and visitors generally, not just overnight.

I'm not sure how people renting out a room handle this, generally? Do they rent out the room with a single bed, in which case I guess they are giving a message that overnight visitors are unwelcome? Or do they have a double bed, but rent the room to couples, in which case they'll want to meet both partners before signing the lodger agreement?

I would never dream of asking about a potential lodgers sexual orientation as it is one of the "cant discriminate on these grounds" items! So I would never ask and not expect you to tell me. However if you do tell or ask me then thats fine with me.

As a residential landlord, my main concern is that you don't have a different/strange partner every night and that applies to all potential lodgers regardless of sexual orientation. I have vetted you and you only so I have to put a huge amount of trust in the person you bring into my home even if its just occasionally. If it is an established relationship we expect to be introduced and would ask not to have your partner more than twice a week and not every weekend.

I have a second small room with a single bed in it so no overnight guests in there! But I also make sure that other people in the house are aware and comfortable if I take a gay lodger. I had one girl refuse to stay with me because I had a male in the house - the male was my son - Pleeese! Wonder if she would have been ok if he was gay - we will never know

Honeylife

silvercar wrote: »

I was discussing this with a letting agent that specialises in HMOs. He said 4 foot beds are ideal. Wide enough for overnight guests, but narrow enough they don't become a regular fixture.

Sadly those 4ft beds are being squeezed into single rooms, then marketed as double rooms with no room to swing a cat!

silvercar

Honeylife wrote: »

Sadly those 4ft beds are being squeezed into single rooms, then marketed as double rooms with no room to swing a cat!

Quite possibly, but I assume everyone inspects the room that is going to be their next home.