Advice for my elderly dad

sistafromanothermista

Skibunny40 wrote: »

Just re-reading this thread and noticed something when you were talking about POA. You said that even though your parents separated 20 years ago, your dad wouldn't agree to any one else taking over POA while she was still alive...does that mean that your dad actually has a POA naming your Mum? Or, is he confusing POA with Next of Kin?

He said to me today that he doesn’t need to appoint anyone as POA as he’s still married to my mum and she would have automatic right?

sistafromanothermista

xylophone wrote: »

Is your father now telling you that he wants to return home?

Hi yes. He has returned home today. I’ve contacted around 12 different plumbers so far. I have another one hopefully going round this week so fingers crossed.

Skibunny40

sistafromanothermista wrote: »

He said to me today that he doesn’t need to appoint anyone as POA as he’s still married to my mum and she would have automatic right?

She would be Next of Kin so could make health decisions about him such as whether to switch off life support (sorry) but would he/you really want her to make those sort of decisions?

She would have no authority in terms of financial decisions as next of kin. I assume all your dad's bank accounts/ pensions etc are in his name only? (If her name was still on as a joint account, then she would be able to do certain things)

TELLIT01

sistafromanothermista wrote: »

He said to me today that he doesn’t need to appoint anyone as POA as he’s still married to my mum and she would have automatic right?

And he's absolutely right about that. Also, unless there is a will to the contrary, everything he owns would go to her if he dies before her. I'm assuming this is in England. Sorry to be morbid but that is important to know.

Skibunny40

TellIt01 - I totally agree about the will, but not that the mum would have automatic rights the same as POA?
If this was the case, I wouldn't need to have POA for my husband and vice versa? Or am I misunderstanding your point?

elsien

Skibunny40 wrote: »

She would be Next of Kin so could make health decisions about him such as whether to switch off life support (sorry) but would he/you really want her to make those sort of decisions?

She would have no authority in terms of financial decisions as next of kin. I assume all your dad's bank accounts/ pensions etc are in his name only? (If her name was still on as a joint account, then she would be able to do certain things)

That's incorrect. Without a health/welfare power of attorney, if the person has capacity they make their own decisions. If they don't have capacity, then the professionals would make a best interests decision after consultation with family. Next of kin has no legal meaning, and any medical professional is far more likely to consult with family members who are still close to the person, not someone they have little or no contact with.

[Deleted User]

If you managed to get the money together to buy him a mobility scooter could you manage to get enough money to maybe get the toilet fixed? But you will have to find a plumber that is willing to pretend its a very cheap fix, if its not. If assessing any other repairs, you will have to ask him to be vague with your father, and only tell you what needs to be done and how much it will cost as your father is likely to just say no.

Not an easy situation but it can be managed.

You have to remember your father comes from a time when things we now consider essential (like a flushing loo) weren't when he grew up. Forty years ago, my nan still had an outside loo lol.

TELLIT01

Skibunny40 wrote: »

TellIt01 - I totally agree about the will, but not that the mum would have automatic rights the same as POA?
If this was the case, I wouldn't need to have POA for my husband and vice versa? Or am I misunderstanding your point?

Sorry if I caused any confusion. My point was purely that as the father is still married his estate will automatically go to the mother in the event of his death, if there is no will. I wasn't actually commenting on the POA situation at all. If bank accounts are still in joint names, which does seem unlikely but not impossible, she wouldn't need POA to take control of his finances as she would already have full access.

Robin9

lisyloo wrote: »

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On death POA will give you pretty quick access to bank accounts and is recognised by authorities e.g. insurance companies, DWP etc...............

No it won't POA ceases on death.

parkrunner

elsien wrote: »

The boiler grants are for people receiving pension credit. With the amount of savings your dad has, he is not going to be eligible.

Pension credit is based on income and not savings. His pension could be small enough to get the benefit. The first £10,000 of savings is exempt and above that for every £500 in savings income is assumed as £1 a week.