Money Moral Dilemma: Should I ask my partner to pay a bigger share of the rent?

MSE_Kelvin

This week's MoneySaver who wants advice asks...

My partner and I are planning to move in together. She earns quite a lot more money than I do and wants to rent a flat that's nicer, and therefore pricier, than what I'd usually go for given my salary. I don't want to disappoint her by making her move somewhere she doesn't like - so should I ask her if she'll pay more?

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lookstraightahead

Maybe if you're living in together you could ... ask her?

JuicyJesus

We split our bills proportionately by income (in our case 60/40) and that seems fair. We both have skin in the game that way and we both contribute equivalent to what we're ultimately able.

The issue with the scenario is we don't have any hard figures. An extra increase of £50-100pcm if split proportionately is fine. An increase of £1000pcm would be a bit more of a !!!!!! because while (say) £20-40 a month isn't a big amount in the scheme of things, £400 is.

lindens

JuicyJesus wrote: »

We split our bills proportionately by income (in our case 60/40) and that seems fair. We both have skin in the game that way and we both contribute equivalent to what we're ultimately able.

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we do this too

parkrunner

Just talk to her, you know like adults do. And yes I know this isn't an actual story.

kerri_gt

How about discussing this with her vs internet strangers and perhaps look for that middle ground often used in successful relationships called compromise

cjv

You should dump her immediately and invest the money saved in Bitcoin.

vpeake

explain that if she wants to move somewhere nicer then explain you wouldn’t be able to afford it. Give her the choice to pay more of the rent or move somewhere that you can both afford.

diggingdude

I always find this one difficult as I do a job I don't like to get a relatively high salary for the area, the girl I was seeing gets a low salary and isn't really prepared to push yourself that much to earn more and actually expected me to pay for things mostly. I always felt it was a little unfair as I was miserable doing my job to earn that money but then they clearly wasn't a future in that relationship anyway I may have felt different where the relationship different

alpinelynn

There is only one fair way for couples, in my opinion – each contribute to the household expenses the same percentage of your respective income.

Wils364

If you do not feel comfortable talking this through with your partner, do you think you should take that step at all?