Giving up/ Cutting Down Alcohol Thread Part 16

Leftpeg

Really struggling, currently on 4/14. Today will be 5th. Struggled a lot more than i thought, my wife has had her 2nd miscarriage in the last 9 months and the car has broken down. 
Anyone got any tips to help stay focused on my target and distracted from drinking?
Many Thanks

lantanna

Today is 7/15 for me please.  Sorry to hear that Leftpeg. 

marahouti

I am so sorry that things are so tough for you and your wife Leftpeg.
 I'm not sure what would work for you but I would advise trying to pin down your trigger time and make changes. For myself I identified that my 'danger' time was preparing dinner with a glass of wine in hand and then sitting down to eat with a couple more glasses. I would then continue to drink until bed time😕. I chew gum while cooking and agreed with my husband that we would drink water with our meal when not entertaining. Once dinner is over I am generally ok. I also brush my teeth a lot (toothpaste and merlot is not a good combination 🙂). I decided that I would drink without guilt when socialising or if it was a special occasion but I would not generally drink at home for no particular reason or because my husband was. Best wishes Mara x

maman

I agree marahouti. I know the drinking while cooking is a trigger for me too. 

So sorry to hear your news leftpeg. I think you've done well to get any AF days under the circumstances.

Perhaps as you have a problem with the car you could tell yourself that you don't want to waste money on booze. I find distraction can help so maybe going out for a walk or some other exercise, not so easy at the moment though. Then there's talking to myself and visualisation. When I decide to have an AF day that I'd rather not (like when I need to lose a few pounds) I tell myself (sometimes out loud) that I'm not having a drink and I'll feel pleased when I've achieved  an AF night. I also visualise/look forward to how I'm going to spend the evening sitting comfortably reading or watching something with a lovely cup of something warm etc etc. 

When I first started it was really hard and having a drink was on my mind all evening but now I find that once I get to dinner time (about 7.30 p.m. here) then the thought goes away and the later it gets the more determined I am not to spoil an AF night.  I plan which nights are going to be AF so that helps and I also enjoy the drinking days more when they come around. 

Alternatively, don't buy any.😉

Leftpeg

Thanks for the support guys! My biggest problem is probably a similar time, late afternoon but never actually thought about it being a time in the day so thank you. Definitely going to focus on those times, i like the idea of toothpaste! 

sukeyboo

Sorry to hear your news Leftpeg - struggling with AF days is perfectly understandable. Glad that the suggestions by others have helped you to focus.

Forgot to post earlier but I am on 9/10 for today please cathybird 

Wanna_Bee_Free

So sorry to hear it's tough for you Leftpeg. I am no example to follow but here are my suggestions. More than anything keep on keeping on. Keep on posting, especially if you are struggling. 
I find keeping hydrated and not getting too hungry early evening helps me. I also drink something different with dinner. I like lime and soda, bitter lemon and the Bottle Green lemongrass and ginger. I also like the triple ginger herb tea and will explore some new hot drinks next quarter. 

cathybird

September

7 days =

14 days =

21 days =

28 days =

Target reached =

Target beaten =

September targets

AnnieG 12/25

Arkers 10/TF

Arsenal 8

Barny 16/25

cathybird 16/21

Cuppa 6/20

lantanna 7/15

Leftpeg 4/14

maggiem 11/18

maman 10/10

ManPants 2/TF

marahouti 15/21

PriceySOS 8/20

RobM99 15/25

Season of Mist 15/30

sukeyboo 9/10

WBF 8/20

ALL WELCOME TO JOIN!

cathybird

Leftpeg, sorry to hear you are struggling, that all sounds quite tough to go through My best tip for not drinking is to think of it as something you're still allowed to do, it's just that you're not going to do it right now, today or in the next hour even. If you can put it off, the urge to drink often passes. When I used to feel a strong urge in the evenings I would say to myself "not right now, maybe later" or "maybe tomorrow". Then tomorrow rolls round and you repeat the same thing. I always found thinking to myself that I couldn't drink at all was depressing and made me feel a little trapped. But thinking that I could drink, just that I wasn't going to right now, really helped.

Also if you can find a substitute drink that you like it can sometimes get you over the tough bits too. I like ginger beer myself and one ginger beer in the evening with a squeeze of lime juice or lemon juice, or bitters, is enough to make me feel I've had a glass of something special.

I hope things get easier for you soon. x

marahouti

Good morning everyone.
16/21 for yesterday please cathybird. Thank you. X