Giving up/ Cutting Down Alcohol Thread Part 16

rosy10

good evening everyone! 6/TF, please Shaggy.

Barny1979

2/24 AFDs today

Wanna_Bee_Free

I wish I could work out how to motivate myself with targets. I've tried Maman's approach but only seem to do just enough and rarely bust a target. My usual style is a last minute dash to the finish at the eleventh hour. I tried TF but that was no better. My biggest motivator is the 150 annual banana (now cute dog) which I tell myself I can do but haven't achieved either of the last 2 years. Like Cathybird said it's demotivating not to hit a target. It makes me feel a lack of belief and confidence in myself. I worked out I need just under 20 days a month to hit my 150 which would be a huge jump up but is clearly achievable as many of you wonderful people on here are hitting those numbers monthly. I find it difficult not to indulge myself with wine in the evenings. I feel as if I'm at a crossroads of stepping up or not. Do I want this? Can I put the effort in?

2/16 please Shaggy xx

Barny1979

3/24 AFDs today

marahouti

8/22 for August and 5/5 SNC please Shaggy.
I'm feeling quite pleased with myself as yesterday was my 20th consecutive AF day. It's not my longest in 2019 as I did Dry January but I do feel I am making progress in my aim of becoming an occasional drinker. Thank you I couldn't have done it without this thread. X

cathybird

Morning all, not an AFD for me, got a birthday party followed by drinks for friends visiting from NY, but I am going to try not to overdo it.

Arkers

Good afternoon everyone,
8 please Shaggy
Arkers x

Honey_Bear

Wanna_Bee_Free wrote: »

I wish I could work out how to motivate myself with targets. I've tried Maman's approach but only seem to do just enough and rarely bust a target. My usual style is a last minute dash to the finish at the eleventh hour. I tried TF but that was no better. My biggest motivator is the 150 annual banana (now cute dog) which I tell myself I can do but haven't achieved either of the last 2 years. Like Cathybird said it's demotivating not to hit a target. It makes me feel a lack of belief and confidence in myself. I worked out I need just under 20 days a month to hit my 150 which would be a huge jump up but is clearly achievable as many of you wonderful people on here are hitting those numbers monthly. I find it difficult not to indulge myself with wine in the evenings. I feel as if I'm at a crossroads of stepping up or not. Do I want this? Can I put the effort in?

Just because other people can run a Four Minute Mile doesn't mean I can. If missing an annual target is demotivating, then perhaps setting one that is within your grasp if you step up the pressure a bit on your current achievement, say 10%. This isn't a competition; it's a personal target and only you can know what's realistic. (I'd have had a struggle to get to 52 AF Days, and I really did try.)

9/31 please, Shaggy.

cathybird

Wanna_Bee_Free wrote: »

I wish I could work out how to motivate myself with targets. I've tried Maman's approach but only seem to do just enough and rarely bust a target. My usual style is a last minute dash to the finish at the eleventh hour. I tried TF but that was no better. My biggest motivator is the 150 annual banana (now cute dog) which I tell myself I can do but haven't achieved either of the last 2 years. Like Cathybird said it's demotivating not to hit a target. It makes me feel a lack of belief and confidence in myself. I worked out I need just under 20 days a month to hit my 150 which would be a huge jump up but is clearly achievable as many of you wonderful people on here are hitting those numbers monthly. I find it difficult not to indulge myself with wine in the evenings. I feel as if I'm at a crossroads of stepping up or not. Do I want this? Can I put the effort in?

Wanna Bee Free, if it helps, you could put your target down - there's no shame in it. I am thinking over whether I need to do that in one of the other challenges I am doing. You've done 53 and we're just half way past the year, why not aim for 100? I know other people do more days but it doesn't matter, it's what works for you. Other people have got different circumstances. Speaking for myself I don't have a partner or kids, am quite quiet and like nothing better than hanging round the house, so I don't have a massive social life, or many work occasions either, and if I decide not to drink there's no one around the house who is drinking to tempt me. Those factors complicate things for other people. xx

maman

cathybird wrote: »

Wanna Bee Free, I know other people do more days but it doesn't matter, it's what works for you. Other people have got different circumstances. Speaking for myself I don't have a partner or kids, am quite quiet and like nothing better than hanging round the house, so I don't have a massive social life, or many work occasions either, and if I decide not to drink there's no one around the house who is drinking to tempt me. Those factors complicate things for other people. xx

Speaking as the person who probably has the lowest targets on the thread I'd agree you have to do what works for you wbf based on what you want to achieve. My DH drinks daily but in moderation. So he drinks in front of me on AF days but doesn't try to encourage me to join him. My aim when I joined the thread was not to drink on 'normal' weekdays and to drink more moderately at weekends. I also drink on occasions such as meals out with friends or holidays which we do often. Ideally I'd like to do 4 AF school nights every week (approx 16 per month) but I know I wouldn't stick to it as my social life would get in the way. So I aim low at 10 but the closer I can get to 16 the better. A 14 day smiley is great for me.

I'm not posting to tell you what you should do or to do what I do but just to show empathy that setting a target isn't simple and requires planning and soul searching. Whatever you decide you'll get support on here.

I'm having another AF Friday. Today's a bit easier than previously.

7/10 AFDs please Shaggy