How soon is too soon

Silvertabby

seven-day-weekend wrote: »

We met on a blind date in June 1971. Got married in October 1971. We were aged 21 and 22.

Still married now, still each other's soul mate and best friend.

Such a blessing.

Bit longer for us - met and married within 18 months. Been together 25 years, and still adore each other.

StaffieTerrier

My partner moved in after 4 months as he needed to move out of where he was living so we decided on a trial of living together. We're planning on getting married but 4 years in there doesn't feel like there's any rush. We're very happy as we are.

I'd echo the advice to enjoy it rather than overthink it.

LilElvis

Met my husband 17 years ago and knew immediately that he was the one for me (me mid thirties and a couple of long term relationships, him 43 and divorced after 8 year marriage). Bought a house together two years later and got married after another two years - it's actually our 13th wedding anniversary today and our eight year old wants us all to sit down later and watch our wedding DVD I was spot-on about him being "the one", but the idea of marriage never entered my head and I probably wouldn't have bothered if it wasn't for having a child/ pension/ financial security. Going to go and put some music on now and dance around the kitchen to Elvis - got married by him in Las Vegas :T

unholyangel

For some people it works out. Statistically though, for most it doesn't. If we could tell when it will work indefinitely then we'd all have gotten married after a few weeks and divorce would be unheard of. Everyone's relationship is different. You need to find what works for you.

But personally I'd say theres a honeymoon phase, especially if you don't live together. Its then you get to know their habits and whether they annoy you or not. And also how conflict resolution is dealt with.

The only caution I'd give would be to ask if you's have had discussions to know you're on the same page (or at least reading from the same book). Do their actions match up with their words? Its easy to pretend to be someone else for a short while, but true colours shine through eventually.

~_Daisy_~

Met in the June, moved in together in August, 12 years ago, been married for almost 9 years.
Met online on Plenty of Fish,
If you know you know.
Life could not be better.
But you do need to be thinking the same.

lincroft1710

Apparently my parents went out for a week then dad had to go back and help Monty bring WW2 to a close, leaving mum to arrange the wedding in 3 months time.

They were together for 57 years until mum died

mellymoo74

Moved in together after 6 weeks
Married after 18 months
15 years married this year

kazwookie

Meet and married after 9 weeks, divorced 13 years later!

Happier_Me

Met when we were 20 and 21, I knew 3 weeks after meeting him that he was 'the one' and I wouldn't describe myself as a romantic at all.

Engaged after 5 months, bought our first house three years after that and got married three years after that.

Together 23 years now and I can't imagine us not going the distance. We complement each other and are simply better together. So it can work and you can have that feeling but it doesn't mean you have to rush things.

LoisGriffin

Thank you all for the responses. I will try to answer in order.

Ognum I truly don’t know why I want to get married. I just know that it is suddenly quite important. I can’t explain even to myself - I am sorry.

DCFC I think your point that he could walk away applies to most people in a relationship. Isn’t that a risk you just take.

As I mentioned I really feel he is my life partner so I thought this would cover that yes - we have spoken about this and we are on the same page.
I think my question was less - will it work, and more is it the most ridiculous thing to do.

Thank you so much for everyone responding about their early weddings and moving-ins. And happy wedding anniversary LilElvis. I don’t know why it helps to read about other people’s experiences but somehow it does.



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