Neighbor expects me to be quiet at 7pm

pollypenny

The neighbour should be living in a detached house. Just carry on with normal life, OP. Children make a noise - sometimes happy, sometimes crying or shouting if they fall out.

She must have the perfect kid, or is it stuck on an iPad all day?

rach_k

It sounds like normal family noise, which you don't have to stop, but if staying on friendly terms with your neighbour is important to you, can you put the kids to bed a little earlier? At least then you can say you tried and, if I'm completely honest, my very first thought when I read your post was that 8.30pm is a late night for 5 year olds. My 9 and 7 year olds are in bed before that - 9 year old can read until 8.30pm, 7 year old until 8pm. Your kids may then wake up earlier but your neighbour can deal with that instead!

As I said, you don't have to do anything if you don't want to, but I wish we were on better terms with our neighbours. I'd happily turn down my music or my kids at certain times (both of which are at normal noise levels) if they would stop stomping around at midnight. Put something in the bank for later, if ever you have a request! You can get all "I don't legally have to so I won't" about it, but it's much nicer if you can just work it out nicely.

ophiuchus

Mar2 wrote: »

Hello to everyone!
We live in terraced house with very unfortunate layout, as neighbours on each side have their bedroom from the side of our house. I have got 3 little kids. Twins will be 6 in February and their little brother just turned 2. Twins go to sleep around 8:30pm. The little one in not a good sleeper and every day is different. Sometimes he wakes up in the middle of the night, and doesn't want to go back to sleep until morning. But whenever he wakes up - I am taking him downstairs, as I realize the walls are thin and he may woke up neighbours.
The Neighbours, who have their bedroom next to our staircase and hallway, has one kid who is 5. He is in bed at 7. Since she told me that, I am trying to keep my children downstairs after 7, but as I am alone with them (my husband works on afternoon shift) it's not easy. And of course bedtime...3 children taking a bath etc, - it's always loud. My neighbor sent me text asking to keep the noise down on numerous occasions, after 7pm.
The last one was at 8, on Saturday demanding to stop making noise, as it's 8 o'clock and I know that her child is sleeping, I know he is going to bed at 7 and she won't be happy if I wake him up, and that they put up with a lots of noises coming from me and my children, and I am taking "absolute !!!! now"
We don't drink alcohol, don't party, do not listen to loud music, don't do banging with hammer etc...
I was always apologetic, and said "sorry, I will try to keep the noise down". I understand her point of view. I want to be a good neighbour but I am not a pushover. Is it reasonable for her to expect me to "stop breathing" after 7 ? Are there any legal residential 'noise free' hours? I really feel frustrated and stressed in my own home, as when my child e.g. falls over in the hallway and cries - my first thought is "oh, no, she will wake up neighbour's kid" when is should be "oh, no! My poor baby".
Is there something I can do about that? Or should I just ignore her?

Marvel1 wrote: »

That's another number added to my blocked list on my mobile.

Yes, this sounds sensible.

-taff

Can you hear her?

paddy's_mum

(Response to next text) Dear Neighbour. We are sad that our efforts to avoid your family being affected by our normal life noise have failed.

We are feeling stressed by having to tiptoe in our own home for hours on end while at the same time having to listen to your own family's activities.

Accordingly, we are planning to move to a detached rented house. In order to afford such a move, we will be renting our house to a family of travellers who wish to spend winters off the road. We have met four of their teenage daughters who all seem to be lovely girls. We have yet to meet any of their sons.

We are sure that you will prefer to have them as your new neighbours and look forward to hearing how pleased you are that we - such a thorn in your side - will no longer be causing you such a huge amount of trouble and stress.

Kind regards Mar2

(Tongue in cheek, before anyone slates me! :rotfl: )

coffeehound

Mar2 what nationality are the neighbours?

charlotte1994

If the noise is normal everyday family noise, no of course she's not being reasonable.

Agree! It is normal noise! I would never dream of complaining about my neighbours kids, it can't be helped in terraced houses. One of my neighbours is really loud, I swear they wear bricks for shoes when they walk up the stairs and slam all their doors! That being said I don't complain and it's just sounds of the house and not all day.

Can you hear her TV/Radio etc? Even if you can't I would tell her that you are trying to keep the noise down but everyday noises can't be helped! If she keeps going on at it I would tell her to get stuffed.

bertiewhite

The trouble with noise is that, even with a decibel meter, what is acceptable is subjective.

My grandson makes (to me) a normal amount of noise when he is playing but is discouraged from screaming unnecessarily as I don't like hearing it and I'm sure others don't either.

On the other hand my neighbours obviously think that having a daily shouting competition with their kids is perfectly normal.

dekaspace

From my own experience I tend to keep quiet as possible despite having powerful speakers the bass is low as they can get and volume is loud enough to hear without being hard to make out, never had a complaint but when I talked to neighbours in past and politely talked about their noise have been told they can hear me. At last property my neighbour told me I shouldn't hoover past 7pm as his kids went to bed then and it woke them up, but his kids woke me up around 5am as they put tv on loud and laughed and screamed.

That being said I never complained about my current neighbours until they had a few late night parties, all day kids party, regular guests round till around midnight a few days a week who liked to drink and shout made worse by laminate flooring so say 10 adults and 8 kids at one time was stressful.

At least mine never create noise during night so I get a good nights sleep and have never complained about me.

Ergates

elsien wrote: »

If the noise is normal everyday family noise, no of course she's not being reasonable.

Another agreed from me. Kids make noise, it's part of life, she needs to deal with it.