Hazelnutty's New Start

Hazelnutty

Hi everyone!

A really intense day yesterday after DD stood up to her Dad for the first time. It was about their holiday together. A proper stand-off when he realised he couldn't just brush her off or browbeat her. I was really proud of her finding her voice. In the middle of the day, she was just too upset about his treatment of her so we went out for 5 Guys (her choice) and watched 3 episodes of RuPaul (ditto) - by the end, she'd come to her own position on it all, phoned her Dad and seems pretty positive. I will miss her like crazy!

Now she's definitely going, OH and I can make a few plans - we definitely need some kind of a break together. Paddleboarding got cancelled so have used the money to pay for a night in the Peaks, with a 2nd night coming from another pot OH pays into. Pleased about this - we need a break but just don't feel able to pay for a full week away with all the renovation work going on. I'll be able to cover the pub dinners and pints from my Ents or Holiday pots   I'm working the rest of the time but we're determined to fit in some swimming and bakery trips

CC has cut off and it's £50 under target I have a target for CC, which is the total of the pots that stay in my current account during the month (food, non-food bits, fuel, ents) - this then should pay off the CC at the end of the month. As I'm on track with the current account, coming in under budget releases some cash for reallocation, which, as every MFWer knows, is pretty darn exciting Haven't decided yet what to do - will be done in my end of month report

Hazelnutty

Evenin' all!

So DD has gone to her Dad's this evening ahead of the hols tomorrow so I'm in my usual mopey mood But at least she left in good spirits. We had a fab time at a try-out taekwondo session at the local park this morning. It was going to be just OH and me but DD came along and became the total star of the show! She's done karate and judo before so had a lot of grounding. Looks like we'll be doing it as a family

Quite excited to start booking some things to do while she's away. I joined a cinema club recently so booked my first free ticket and also another swimming session (not the lido !) OH and I have scheduled in some other bits and pieces, mostly food n drink related Only other spends was 2 light to clamp onto the bedframe (£45 was the best deal anyway, then also used Quidco - will come out of house virtual pot)

themadvix

It sounds like it’s all going well Hazelnutty, and well done to your DD for standing up to her dad!

Sistergold

Welldone to DD for standing up for herself! 

Clarity1972

As I'm on track with the current account, coming in under budget releases some cash for reallocation, which, as every MFWer knows, is pretty darn exciting Haven't decided yet what to do - will be done in my end of month report

You are so right Hazelnutty!! Mine gets reallocated to OPs everytime but its still a buzz that there's some 'new' money to move! 

Hazelnutty

Thanks @themadvix & @Sistergold I feel it's a real turning-point in their relationship and our family dynamic. I just hope he realises it too! He wants her to behave in a more grown-up way and meet higher expectations - I pointed out that the flip-side of this was us treating her in a more grown-up way and meeting her expectations for a more mature relationship with her parents. She has a right to express her views have them taken seriously! If we don't model that, how is she going to navigate adult relationships herself? She should expect her views to matter.

Yes, @Clarity1972 ! Even shuffling the odd few quid is fun. I also love budget day when I fiddle around with my spreadsheet! I know it must seem a bit sad to outsiders but I love it! 

Karmacat

Wow!  Some huge steps forward here, on every level, congratulations Hazelnutty

the_cross_rabbit

Will the government  U turn on a levels have an effect on you over the coming weeks?
CRx

DiscountDuck

Well done to your brave and mature DD for that courageous step. I hope her dad realises he needs to treat her as a young adult whose views matter now. Have a wonderful break with OH, it is well deserved with all the stress of building work. 

Hazelnutty

the_cross_rabbit said:

Will the government  U turn on a levels have an effect on you over the coming weeks?
CRx

Hi CR probably not as the students coming to us were almost all 'unconditional firm' (which basically means we said we'd definitely accept them and they said they definitely would come) but we are way down on our usual numbers. I'm lucky in that my university has prioritised avoiding redundancies so for now I'm safe. I'm most worried for the brilliant staff in the universities that educate the vast majority of students but get zero attention in the media. You'd think there were only 5 or 6 universities in this country the way people talk! Fact is, there are great academics in every university not just in the supposedly prestigious few and tbh you'll probably get a better experience in a less 'prestigious' place that actually cares about you as an individual rather than packing students in for their fees because they can. There is serious risk now to the viability of many institutions if those few hoover up as many students as they can because the cap has been lifted. It would be such a loss to local economies, to students, staff etc etc. We all support students getting the grades they deserve but the assumption that they've failed or their lives are over if they don't go to one of those few is just insulting to them and us (and not true). Sorry, I hadn't meant to give you such a long rant! It's just heartbreaking what we're hearing