New plan...time to see some movement!

HairyHandofDartmoor

Lifeisforliving19 wrote: »

Not been around for a few days. Sorry to hear you are getting a bit overwhelmed with it all. As others have said, the important thing is making memories with your family. We are still paying off our DMP but have decided that memories are important and are still booking holidays if we can and doing things. My motto now is that who knows what tomorrow will bring? What if we spent all our time, tidying and repairing the house and paying bills and then suddenly something happened and you couldn't make memories any more and all your past memories were of you doing all that work and paying debts? Even if your debts only go down by a couple of ££ a month, it is still getting paid, however slowly. You are doing a great job, you have decluttered so much this year and should be proud of yourself.

I totally agree with this :T.

Lifeisforliving19

HairyHandofDartmoor wrote: »

I totally agree with this :T.

Thanks. I have seen so many people over the last couple of years, who are so intent on work, pay bills, etc that suddenly something happens and they realise all the things they should have done and now it is too late. Life is about memories and experiences. x

jwil

HairyHandofDartmoor wrote: »

Sorry you're feeling bad Jwil. Being in debt is always stressful and makes every other problem seem worse.

I understand that you're worried about the holidays but when you have kids it's important to make memores with them. If it was just you and DH you could live really frugally, but you don't want to deprive your kids.

You are paying off the debts, I know it's not as quickly as you'd like, but you are doing it and they are going down.

With regard to your clutter, you inherited the problem so it's not your fault. You've made inroads into it but again it has to be a gradual thing or it will take over your life. Try and see what you've already done rather than what's left to do.

Our house is an untidy cluttered tip at the moment and needs lots of repairs done on it to weather proof it, but I'm ignoring it and concentrating on earning money at the moment. In the holidays I'll do a bit of tidying and decluttering but the house repairs will have to wait until we have a secure income.

The important things are 1) Are the kids happy and looked after and 2) Are the debts going down (no matter how slowly) and 3) Are you and DH making time to look after yourselves and your own mental health.

You're doing amazingly well Jwil but we all get down at times and feel like we're not making enough progress. But you are making progress.

Anyway I'm sure the kids enjoyed swimming and Little Jwil enjoys his party today .

Thank you, you are right :A

WannabeFree wrote: »

I'm just catching up

Brilliant job at the carboot and eBay sales.

Holiday sounded like you have a brilliant time. Worth every penny don't feel guilty! And that's me shouting at you

Hope you manage to find another bed for DD. My smalls where from eBay last year and have been brilliant! The girls have bunk beds but still the cheapest on there at £70 and DS a normal single. It was around £34 delivered and it's just as good as new now.

Sorry you're struggling again. Be happy with the decisions you've made. Don't feel guilty for spending (without getting in debt obviously that's not what I mean ) but a budgeted holiday/a budgeted day out/home improvements are all needed for happiness. You can't turn back time. The smalls are only small once and as much time and enjoyment should be done. It's needed for all of you. Just remember you're doing your best. That's all you can do. Be happy big hugs

Xx

I missed little jwils birthday - glad he had a lovely time. I remember when you where pregnant with little jwils and I was following that diary. Can't believe it's 6 years!

take care
x

Thank you WF I remember the panic when I found out I was expecting :rotfl: I'm so glad it happened though.

in_need_of_direction wrote: »

Adding my tuppence to what’s been said. Take 2 minutes and read your declutter lists for year to date and last year. Those plus your debt position while making magical memories are your progress. I get how it feels when the house weighs you down. Sometimes I feel walls are closing in on me. When that happens, my drastic measure is to identify a room I need to be in and literally move the clutter elsewhere. It doesn’t solve the issue but it gives me a bit of head space as well as virtual space. I do try to shove it into boxes, baskets etc as then it’s a more manageable sort when I can face it

Thank you You are right, just looking back on my lists and photos shows how far we have come.

jwil

Kitten868 wrote: »

I'm not surprised it overwhelms you. It would overwhelm anybody. Add in to that that it's not yours and you have no say on if or when it goes and it's down right infuriating. Your husband knows how you feel about it and has picked up the pace but they're never up to female standards.

You didn't take on any new debt to book the holiday. You didn't spend family money on yourself. Cut yourself some slack. I'm terrible at overcommitting to home improvements that seem affordable but spiral particularly when we're still doing something else. Added to that I feel bad that I'm spending on the house not on the kids.... even though it's for them.

You are getting there and doing so well. You've been doing this for years and years. That's so hard. Before you know it both kids will be at school and your childcare bill will have really dropped, your creditors will be open to offers and the house will get emptier. Not telling you to wish your life away but don't want you to lose focus of where you're getting to. You're amazing. Keep going xxx

Thank you :A

Lifeisforliving19 wrote: »

Not been around for a few days. Sorry to hear you are getting a bit overwhelmed with it all. As others have said, the important thing is making memories with your family. We are still paying off our DMP but have decided that memories are important and are still booking holidays if we can and doing things. My motto now is that who knows what tomorrow will bring? What if we spent all our time, tidying and repairing the house and paying bills and then suddenly something happened and you couldn't make memories any more and all your past memories were of you doing all that work and paying debts? Even if your debts only go down by a couple of ££ a month, it is still getting paid, however slowly. You are doing a great job, you have decluttered so much this year and should be proud of yourself.

Thank you :A

jwil

Thank you everyone, I appreciate the messages

Still feeling pretty rubbish but I think I'm tired and maybe coming down with a cold which probably doesn't help.

The holiday spends have been from using the Council Tax and Water free months, so it's 'free' money, not money allocated for bills or anything and you are all right, I should be focussing on memories too, I don't want to waste their childhood!

Little jwil enjoyed his party and I just sat in the car with a book for 2 hours while he was there. It was a welcome relief from everything for a while.

I found another bed on FB last night, messaged about it and had collected it within the hour. That's how FB should work! :j It doesn't have a mattress but we can order that online, and it was only £20. Little miss was quite excited when she found out this morning (it was done after she was in bed last night).

Had physio this morning and my back seems to be much better now. I have an open appointment for 8 weeks should anything arise, but other than that I'm signed off now :T She's given me some great advice about other exercises to do for general strength as well, so really pleased.

I'm back to the docs next week, so must post off the counselling referral soon. The meds have helped immensely with my physical anxiety symptoms but clearly have not improved my general mood.

DH sold a few things yesterday and had kindly packed them all for me this morning :T I just had to print labels etc.

I've had someone message me about a couple of items, so hopefully they are selling soon. I'm getting his whole life history in his messages, it's quite funny and sweet.

Better get back to it, work is still crazy busy and I've got my appraisal in a minute :eek:

ftbwannabe

That's great re your back!
Hope your appraisal went well

[Deleted User]

Hope your appraisal went well x

Lifeisforliving19

So glad you found another bed. We are in the process of thinking about new/second hand bed for spare room. Its hard trying to find the right one.
Good to hear your back is improving too:)

HairyHandofDartmoor

I hope your appraisal went well.

jwil

Thank you everyone

I'm really pleased about my back.

My appraisal went well thankfully :T It's going to be a busy year for me, but lots to get stuck into. I'm developing our future strategy so it's going to be a big job but should be interesting.

Little miss had her first night in the new bed last night and all went well :T She is on her cot mattress at the moment, but proper mattress should be arriving tomorrow. She is very pleased with it

I've had a really sore throat the last few days, but it doesn't seem to be developing into anything thankfully. Hopefully it will clear up soon.

I had a voucher on ebay for £10 off a spend. So I've immediately used it for some trousers. My trousers that I'm wearing today have gone from slightly too big to positively falling down :rotfl: so I need some more. The voucher means they've only cost me £2 too :T

Two ebay parcels posted today.

I need to try and check out some surveys as I'm close to cashing out on a few.

Have a good day everyone.