Big change, new lifestyle!

mattpaint

I think you should consider going to a meeting. You can't last a day without alcohol and that is a worrying thing. Please seek additional help.

Pixnmix

Mattpaint, thank you for your advice. I will consider that if I don't continue the positives. However, that is a vast improvement on my other evenings which consisted of a drink while making dinner then a couple of quite large ones through the evening, all of them on my own. I acknowledge I have a habit/ problem that needs breaking, which is why I'm doing this thread. The last 2 nights I had one drink with my OH, started eating far more healthily and went to the gym. I wont be drinking tonight or tomorrow night.
I will and can do this.

Doodles

Just wanted to wish you luck and give you a hug of encouragement.

System

Your post resonates with me. My Son is an alcoholic. The medication he takes from the doctor and his sometimes daily meetings with the AA he says gets him though.

When he has a bad day he remembers his neighbour who had cirrhosis who he discovered, dead in his bed with a bottle of vodka by his side.

One day at a time.

fishybusiness

I have been known to buy wine on the way home and drink when I got home. Not any more!

Used to be one of my tricks in an old life, come home from work late, pop in for a few bits of food at the supermarket and oh why not, grab a bottle of wine.

The art of self deception!!

hazyjo

Pixnmix wrote: »

...a sevillo orange G&T (sorry) and feel far more positive. Just one small one with my OH and then off for an early night.

Why didn't you have a cuppa? If you feel you're missing out on something like the 'experience' as much as the actual alcohol (I mean, what's the point of one before bed, it isn't gonna get you drunk, it isn't like you're going out somewhere and want the confidence, and you are just adding unnecessary calories and alcohol into your body - and then going to sleep!), then try making the G+T up, but just put a bit of gin round the top of the glass but none in it, and having just the tonic. I know it's a bit crap, but you'll fool yourself and your OH (don't tell him! He won't know. There's something about couples drinking where one encourages the other to join them or makes them feel worse for not drinking than actually having one).


Sounds like he's kidding himself too about how much he drinks. Me and my ex hubby were the same. Every excuse under the sun to have a drink - whether it be train probs, traffic, a birthday, a hot day, a cold miserable day, a busy day, a boring day... honestly, we were in the pub or drinking at home every night. It was only when I'd been with him around 5 months, I realised he'd not actually gone a night without drinking (I'd been pretty good back then, but he got me into terrible habits!).

(Says she who had two glasses of wine last night lol. I do feel your pain - it's very easy to say it, but I appreciate not easy to do!)

silverwhistle

I'm lucky in that although I occasionally have too much I can go days without a drop. My body tells me if I'm overdoing it, so I'm able to have dozens of bottles of wine in the cupboard/fridge without temptation. Also it's meant to be a pleasure, so I don't drink if I'm down, tired or stressed. When I do drink I think about what wine will match the food or occasion, I try not to grab any old bottle in an automatic way.

Last Sunday I went to the pub to watch England, not having a telly at home and had a number of pints of real ale. Then I wandered home but popped into the other village pub with a sunny garden, got chatting and (cough, cough) had quite a few more.. It was such a lovely day, good conversation, that no guilt was involved! As I say, it should be a pleasure, not an automatic thing, and if a pub doesn't have real ale they don't get my business.

In this hot weather I find having suitable alternatives helps, so decent tonics with the ice and lemon but no gin, sparkling water with a dash of lime and so on. Tea is a great alternative as pointed out. I start with builders tea in the morning to get me going but by the afternoon it's on to Darjeeling or Ceylon.

Tonight is pre-season football training, so there's another incentive not to have too much, and I find afterwards I've no need for a drink. In women's football we don't all go to the pub after matches!

So if you can start with a couple of AF nights a week that would be great, but when you do have a drink make sure it's decent stuff, tastes good and enjoy it!

Pixnmix

Judi, my heart goes out to you. My father was an alcoholic for many years. I know first hand how damaging it can be to families.

Hazyjo, my OH rarely drinks. He goes out once a month with his pals for a few and never usually has an alcoholic drink in the week. He just fancied a g&t with the weather being so hot. So did I for same reason. It wasn't an excuse. And I didn't have a drink to want to get drunk or for any other reason than I like orange flavoured gin with tonic. I have never needed alcohol for confidence. It's simply that I like the taste of certain types. And it's become an every evening habit which I'm now determined to stop.

Silverwhistle, you're right. OH bought some fizzy flavoured water today. I'm having a strawberry one with ice right now. It's lovely.

FBaby

well done for that first day. Come back here if your willpower start floundering, we'll be there to pick you back up.

Primrose

Look for really nice substitutes for alcohol which still give you a lift.
I find that a long glass of tonic water with a dash of Bottle a Green's lime and Coconut Twist cordial and lots of jingly ice cubes makes a refreshing drink where yiu won,t even miss the alcohol.

As for exercise, read Dr. Rangan Chattergee,s book entitled The four
Pillars of Health. It,s written for busy people and recommends taking small steps in four different areas of your life, exercise, food, sleep and relaxation time so you don,t feel overwhelmed with all the changes you have to implement at once.

He recommends "exercise snacking" if you can,t get to the gym. Ie doing a
Dozen squats at the kitchen counter whilst waiting for your morning kettle to boil and simple physical things like this to get you started into a more active regime.

Trying to do everything st once will probably feel overwhelming and cause you to fail. Incorporating smaller changes at first will help give you the mindset for further changes