Loopy's Bankruptcy Journey

loobylou2

Hi Lou

I've read this thread and the other one which got deleted and I just wanted to say that I wish you all the very best for the future. You are still a young woman and have the rest of your life in front of you. Don't look back, look forward!!! I've learned a lot from reading your story and its made me think a lot about my own life and debts which although only around 6K are high enough for me. I wouldn"t want to find myself in the same situation as yourself or anybody else who has been made bankrupt and reading your story has helped to reinforce my resolution for 2008 to get rid of them. Your resolution for 2008 should be to enjoy the rest of your
life. I wish you lots of success and happiness in the future.

loopy_lou1

13.1.2008

For those who've stayed awake for the other 8 pages - CONGRATULATIONS!
Well, it's been a month since I went bankrupt. It was a difficult decision to make and the hardest part was deciding to do it. Not ACTUALLY doing it.
I've felt every emotion under the sun. Happy, relieved, terrified, sad, guilty, bitter, stupid, regretful, lazy, elated and so on.

One month on and things are different. I've started to feel better. The thing I worried about most is what people would think of me. The people that count have been nothing but supportive. A lot don't know - it's not something you say over a coffee - "by the way I'm bankrupt" - it's a stigma still to the person it's actually happening to. I've learnt so much over the past three months and I've been able to say to others that as we've been told here - if you're in "debt crisis" you have a couple of options. One is an IVA and another is a DMP and the last resort is BR. My option was BR because I'd tried an IVA and now I don't qualify for a DMP because of my employment status. I do have days of guilt but I think in the long term it's the best thing I could've done and I wish I'd listened two years ago when a friend suggested it.

I feel a lot better about myself regarding confidence because I now know that if I save and look after my money that in a few months I'll be able to buy that perfect LBD and not feel like a tank in it. I had no self-esteem, no confidence, hiding my body and my debts and now I can look forward to doing something about my weight and in turn look forward to zipping up the size 10 pants that I haven't worn for 8 years!!!!

In short, if I get early discharge (fingers crossed) I can get that better job, better money, and actually move into my own place and live on a proper budget.

I was unlucky and the victim of scrutiny the day I went bankrupt. It was horrible, I was in tears. I suppose it's my own fault for sharing my story on a public forum. The message they got that it was a day out in Blackpool it wasn't. It was a relief that it wasn't pistols at dawn and me with no gun.
I want those people and everyone here to know - I learnt something - I learnt that you can't run away from your problems you have to face them. That you also should stand up for yourself when things get hard. No one is going to do it for you. There will be people that support you and people that disagree - the ones who love you and understand will stand by you. You're not a criminal for going BR for overspending. You are a little bit naive and desperate maybe but most that do this have good reason to.

I'll keep updating because I've received so much amazing advice here and great support I'd like to give something back.

2008 - I want a new me. No, I want the old me back!!!!!!!

Love and Best Wishes L x

MammaCas

Hello!

Fantastic post. :T

I was around on here on 'that' day and the way you dealt with the barrage of posts was admirable. It actually put me off from posting for a while and knocked me sick.

Good luck, and hello to the 'old you' xx

fiveyearplan

You sound a lot more positive. So I suppose this is really a happy new year! Good for you.

betterlatethannever

Here, here, well said Mamma.:T
You've dealt with everything in an admirable way. All of this will have made you a stronger and better person and that can't be such a bad thing.
You have to go through crap in your life at times, but if you can come out of it and still be smiling then you've come a long way.
Your still young enough to have a new start and theres plenty of time to rebuild yourself.
A day out in Blackpool; i think you could have chosen a more exotic resort for that comment:rolleyes:

JulesJay

Well done Loopy Lou I am glad you are feeling better and more positive about your future!

You deserve it after everything you went through.

Take care sweetie.

Jules x

FeelingLow

thanks for sharing that, i am just at the start of this journey & currently feel physically & mentally ill, im scared of what i'm about to face & how we will get through it but knowing you have come through the tunnel with a positive outlook gives me a small glimmer of hope xx

tigerfeet2006

Hi Lou, it's wonderful to hear you sounding so much more positive about life. Welcome to the new you, I hope we see a lot more of it.

MammaCass I am so glad you were not put off completely and found the courage to post. I just hope that not too many people were lost because of it.

loopy_lou1

FeelingLow wrote: »

thanks for sharing that, i am just at the start of this journey & currently feel physically & mentally ill, im scared of what i'm about to face & how we will get through it but knowing you have come through the tunnel with a positive outlook gives me a small glimmer of hope xx

Oooh I gave "hope" well that's made my day! Honestly, you will be ok. I had all the same feelings you did. Scared to answer the phone, I was lying, mentally ill (oh yes I had the anti-depressants), sick to the stomach. And now I wake up and know I owe no-one anything. I had all the feelings first but time is a great healer. Look forward. Enjoy your life. This isn't terminal - it's a chapter in your life that helps you learn and grow. I promise you'll look back on this in a few weeks and people will be thanking you for your positivity.

To everyone else - much love. I feel a lot better. I'm not worrying about money now. It's the flaming diet! Well, I've overcome worse so I am damn sure I can tackle my weight. Come on 2008 - give me all you've got.

I was watching "Dancing on Ice" earlier and "Walking on Sunshine" came on for one of the routines and it's my favourite song and I have a reason to be. I have "down" days and "guilty" days but nothing like before. No more HFO, Robinson Way, Moorcroft, Pennine - to name a few. I've had em all. And now I get letters about my Boots Advantage Card, My Pre-paid Credit Card and Bravissimo (big bras!!! - now now) and I enjoy opening that mail!

Love Lou x

betterlatethannever

I know what you mean about 'nice post'. 80% of mine is now freebies that i've applied for on here.
No chance of me getting anything from Bravissimo though:o