Lodger wanting to cook

takman

FreeBear wrote: »

Violence, domestic, or any other form is not acceptable. However, I have a front seat with this particular pair, and can see some of the background issues. Trust me, it is not the bloke who is always the guilty party. Sometimes, it is the woman stoking the fire and trying to get a reaction.

No matter who started it or what the background issues are there is no need for a physical response from either side, especially when they are in someone elses house!

FreeBear wrote: »

Would I have another lodger ?
Sure, but I would have to be selective. No more couples, and someone who is quiet, clean & tidy, sociable, and that I can trust. The extra money is a major help, and having someone around to talk to is good. An extra pair of hands on call when doing DIY is a godsend.

And before you ask, yes I'm up late. Mediating another argument and attempting to prevent it turning in to a bloodbath. Sharp knives are locked away, and a police car is sitting outside.

It sounds like your loneliness is clouding your judgment when it comes to these lodgers.

Money_maker

You need a clean break from this couple. You should be outraged that they are conducting this sort of warring in your property. Money is not that important that you put yourself at risk, after all, what happens if they turn on you? A police car outside wont stop your demise.

Smodlet

Were it not for the fact the Chav from Hell is still the other side of the wall, I could believe she is back with her delightful BF and lodging with you, Freebear. They do not change, ever. Why should they when you are indulging them as you are? We were sucked in too, at first. Believe me, no good deed goes unpunished.

I am with the others; I think you should get them out, now. It is easier to evict lodgers than tenants, apparently although the useless tool who owns the adjoining property seems incapable of evicting his tenant after well over a year! Then, he does not have to live next door to her, does he?

There must be groups or evening classes you could join or, who knows? Maybe the ideal lodger is out there somewhere.

PasturesNew

The general rule of thumb is: Singles should NEVER rent rooms to any type of couple.

They often find the couple "outnumber them" in their own home and start to "take over". They can then also have you "dragged into" their personal spats and moods about each other. Both make for very uncomfortable living.

Singles renting is a strange ballgame as everything's "your space" and having another "stranger" in that space, while you're alone to deal with issues/clash of expectations is much harder than when a couple rent out a room as they're not alone in their dealings and issues etc, so you've nobody to bounce ideas off, or moan to.

Mojisola

From the other thread -
It was (hopefully) a one off event, and now that I'm aware of the background story, a little more forgiving. A notice to vacate triggered the involvement of some outside agencies, and they are now getting the help & support that they need.

I see no need to go in to details, suffice to say I'm satisfied there will be no repeat of the incident.

FreeBear wrote: »

And before you ask, yes I'm up late. Mediating another argument and attempting to prevent it turning in to a bloodbath. Sharp knives are locked away, and a police car is sitting outside.

Still think it was a one-off?

Grezz24

Personally no matter the past of the couple there is zero excusable reason for there to be domestic violence, from either party.

You seem switched on in the matter, so i'm surprised you not kicked them out.

getmore4less

Get a Mon-Fri next time.

Red-Squirrel_2

FreeBear wrote: »

Violence, domestic, or any other form is not acceptable. However, I have a front seat with this particular pair, and can see some of the background issues. Trust me, it is not the bloke who is always the guilty party. Sometimes, it is the woman stoking the fire and trying to get a reaction.

Would I have another lodger ?
Sure, but I would have to be selective. No more couples, and someone who is quiet, clean & tidy, sociable, and that I can trust. The extra money is a major help, and having someone around to talk to is good. An extra pair of hands on call when doing DIY is a godsend.

And before you ask, yes I'm up late. Mediating another argument and attempting to prevent it turning in to a bloodbath. Sharp knives are locked away, and a police car is sitting outside.

Another argument between the same couple? If so, are you insane?

Your first paragraph is very concerning. If a man doesn't want to violently attack a woman, there is nothing at all that she can do to make him do it or provoke that reaction. Categorically, the only time any kind of violence is remotely acceptable is i you are being physically attacked or assaulted and it is the only way to defend and protect your own safety.

Your post about the first argument said there was blood shed and that he ended up in custody and her in a safe house. Sounds to me like he is a violent abuser but that you've fallen for the same sort of charm and excuses that he probably uses to ensnare and then keep control of his victims.

FreeBear

Smodlet wrote: »

Were it not for the fact the Chav from Hell is still the other side of the wall, I could believe she is back with her delightful BF and lodging with you,

Have no fear, no chavs around here. And trust me, these two are so quiet (most of the time), you wouldn't even know they were in or out.

I've come across a few chavs (fortunately, not looking for lodgings), and I find them way too loud and brash. It is best for all concerned if they stay in Essex and have their travel permits revoked

FreeBear

ajak81 wrote: »

How can you even form a basic opinion on a few basic sentences?
So your criticism of the OP is unwarranted and unjustified

Understanding is a three edged sword: your side, their side, and the truth - Kosh, Babylon 5.

I've got a thick skin, and I can stomach most things in my diet, even squirrel (suitably cooked of course) with a bottle of good wine.