Marage breakup due to financial infidelity

ska_lover

I do not know if you should stay or go OP , but the only thing that springs out at the right this moment is for as long as your name is on the tenancy, any future rent arrears accrued will be your problem too

Obviously I do not know the rules if the HA will allow you to remove your name however you do need, at some point, to protect yourself from your partners financial situation

Scorpio33

YOU should stay in the house as the main carer, and if anyone leaves it should be her. She created this mess and she is trying to force you to go voluntarily, which will have an impact on you seeing your kids (The argument being that if you wanted to see your kids, why leave them in the house with her).
Unpack your stuff, treat your home for what it is YOUR home and if she wants one of you to leave, then that has to be her - if she wants to make that choice.

The debt she has created I am confused about. Is is debt in your name alone or is it ID theft from a third party? If there is a third party involved, definitely go to the police about it, as you don't want it coming back to you. if it is simply debt in your name, you need to find out from her how she plans to support herself and how she plans on paying the debt back. Get it in writing of the level of debt and a simple letter signed by you both, agreeing what the level of debt is, the fact that it is HER debt and how she plans on paying you back. If she refuses to do this, then go to the police over a potential fraud. Alternatively, the debt in your name that is hers may be a civil matter, in which case you need to involve a lawyer. If you can't afford a lawyer, go to CAB and ask them for guidance.

I know you are worrying about your kids, but look after yourself and give them time. You will always be their dad, and as long as you can support then and will always be there for them, they will be fine. You can't look after them if you can't look after yourself.

Danb79

Thanks for the advice,. The debts are credit cards and store cards she took out in my name without my knowledge or consent.

She knows she can't make me leave without going to court but is doing all she can to make me leave she is turning the kids against me saying she can't cope with me there and is refusing to talk to me or even say where we stand with our marriage all I get is " I have to think of MY girls ". The eldest is actually my step daughter, took her on as my own when she was 6 months old