taking responsibilty to get me where I want to be

efes_shareholder

A few days since the last update

New news GC number 2 is a little girl , still some time to go before she makes an appearance - feel blessed to have a pidgeon pair

NM's youngest daughter has surprised us with a july wedding - not sure what it is about his daughters having quick turn arounds shortly after deciding to get married

It has re surfaced the subject of MC - I have absolutely no clue what he is doing as we rarely hear from him and I also rarely enquire about his life , it seems as though we have served our purpose to him so now he doesn't really bother that much with his dad either.

His dad called him yesterday and ending up getting in to a discussion with GWG about the logisitics of accomodation for the wedding - I'm not sure why that is the case as we live 20 minutes drive from the venue and NM will not drink so there is absolutely no sense in NM and I staying anywhere other then @ home. Cynical side of me thinks its a hint at an invitation for them to stay over however NM doesn't have the mindset of me to see this and I certainly won't be highlighting it or making any such offer - I do know NM asked GWG to encourage MC to visit more , I still don't want to be around him , I do hope he doesn't visit this weekend as we have my GS's 2nd birthday and NM is already only appearing for a short time so it won't be received well if it interferes with his attendance.

Money is in short supply this month although I should just about make the end in black , I have a £20 off a £60 shop with asda to use and then shouldn't need to buy any further groceries.

we will finally collect the new car today - a bit of shifting things around needed to get rid of the car we have decided to clear but that should hopefully be gone tomorrow.

efes_shareholder

the dots are starting to line up

New car has finally been collected and I absolutely love it - it may just assist with my love of driving again.

the old trusty run around is due to go to WBAC this evening and then we are down to 2 cars with a view to being down to 1 once the MOT next comes around.

new car is only £20 a year road tax which is wonderful until the government decide its not !!

New TV has been delivered , its a beast at 70 inch - NM has called MC to help him install it and said he will bung him a few quid , bit my tongue - not sure why we have to bribe our kids to help our parents out but its up to him and his money so I'll keep my beak out and just be glad the tv is on the wall and not sat in the hallway

shopping will be delivered today , as i do just eat 50% off for fruit and veg on mondays there isn't a huge amount needed but there was a £20 off voucher that needed to be used.

have sent a mortgage overpayment of quidco payments for £50 , this is in addition to the £150 already going automatically , the statement came through yesterday and its almost soul destroying to see the amount of interest as opposed to paying off the debt - I need to focus on driving this down as still another 17 years to go !!!!!

Newstartforme

Lovely news this week ES regards GC and new car , hope GS party goes well x

efes_shareholder

payday today - already quite depleted but have bought new TV , paid for flights , car insurance etc so its not unexpected.

Will try and be extra smart this month but can move savings across which is excatly what they are for!

Had a nice weekend - packed day on saturday with GS birthday party and then a 6 hour shift on the door for him , I dropped him off and picked him up later but with the clocks going forward it threw us and kind of meant sunday was a bit of a write off , attending the event was the promoter who upset me alot last year - he has an overseas event coming up soon which NM has worked FOC , in fact its actually cost us money as we had to pay to travel out there and our expenses whilst we were there. Last year he asked if we were returning and we ummed and ahhed , he said he would put a package together for NM and to think about it and despite seeing him several times since he has not mentioned it - UNTIL NOW! when he asked me not NM on saturday night if I was ready for my holiday. I knew what he was talking about but not sure why he spoke to me about it , as I am going on holiday I said yes and he said " its only 6 weeks away" and walked off. He is aware he upset me last year as I told him.

so I've said to NM , you need to speak to him as he is expecting us there , its on both of them as neither of them have conversed about it since last year. I can't get the week off work , only part so if i were to go with him it would be only for 4 nights max and NM has 4 days work scheduled with the new casual work people which is a huge top up to his pension now he is not working full time

It has annoyed me as the guy is supposed to be a friend and NM has given him his time for the free for the last 2 events not even recieving a thank you until prompted last year , he wouldn't get that from any of the other security guys out there but I'm pretty sure NM won't insist he gets paid if he attends ( he gets paid to do the other events) and will be out of pocket by several hundred pounds in lost earnings

I was just getting my head around flying out there for a few days and then I asked for his work schedule and saw the lost income so I don't think its a good idea - lets see what happens but how typical of men to just assume

tonight I am heading back to the gym after 2 weeks of an awful stomach - I dont want to go but I do need too , we havent yet gone to the new gym and if we can't establish a regular routine its pointless

efes_shareholder

Happy Tuesday people

Has been a lovely blend of relaxtion , recreation and family time this weekend. I am WFH today and tomorrow which fills me with joy!

Money , its going to be a mindful month , the last few have been quite spendy so I need to reign it in a bit. I intend to run our freezer down a bit and only buy what we need food wise as the costs here seem to be really creeping up. Hoped that the PB may chuck some luck my way and take the pressure away a bit - did get a £75 win which is very nice but how lovely would it be to get a big one!!

I've played tonights euro millions just in case fortune wants to find me which it didnt when we watched NM's football team over the weekend.

Still haven't decided if we or I will be going on the event holiday next month - i can't decide if its a good idea for me but we shall see.

Car insurance renewal came through at £290 for the year , thats £50 less then less year and pretty competitve to the rates I've found which other providers so will probably sit tight where I am just for ease this month.

efes_shareholder

terrible couple of weeks with the stomach - the breath test cannot come soon enough

Hopefully will get the suggested medications and then I can start a whole new gut reset - its draining and I am so tired of it now and whatever I do not working.

Low fodmap is not appealling and will mean a complete reset of what I do currently - I am holding back making any huge changes as I do not want to potentially alter the test results , I am however on countdown to that test !!

No further news on last minute assist for the holiday - the guy didnt cover himself in a trail of glory last year and I think he is arrogant ! If I go it is only out of support for NM however I hope he makes the choice not too and too protect the little part time number he has locally.

the month is going to drag I think - trying and failing not to spend , I have a haircut this evening which my bond win will cover most off and my nails need doing before an event on saturday night but shall try and keep the food expenses down

we have started preparing the garden for summer , seems more money too !! I'm not sure if its the current situ with energy , fuel and food costs but I am absolutely feeling the pinch of things a bit more , I guess its better to be aware of it then carry on without making adjustments.

efes_shareholder

not a huge amount to report on other then I am not liking the digits in my bank account this month however its bonus month this month so I hope that I can get myself back on track

its been a costly time though and sometimes its just like that so I guess the tide will turn

car insurance is due this month , usually I pay up front - I am tempted to switch to monthly but I do have the money and i guess going monthly I will just like my bank account less

I wasn't very well this weekend , attended an event with NM but got quite drunk on not much alcohol and had an awful day the next day with aches , pains and sickness ………….I dont think im gonna drink for a while , in fact I seem to have gone off it.

This weekend I am on nanny duty so shouldnt spend much and then the last weekend we are away at an event but that should just produce a wage and not cost a great deal

the event next month still hangs in the balance , promoter says he will sort NM a drink out ! pfft!!!! in my eyes not good enough and devalues what he does for him but its very much NM choice if he decides to go. Its also my choice if I decide to accompany him for part , I am concerned if I don't go I will have massive FOMO and If I do go I will have the hump over said promoter so I really don't see how I can win !!!!

efes_shareholder

Got home last night so a chicken and sweet potato curry which NM prepared ( albeit in the slow cooker and with written instructions but its a start) , tonight will be chilli con carne ( again prepared by NM) and tomorrow fish pie prepared by me whilst he is at work.- I am trying to eat as healthy as poss and I am also not really drinking so lets see if we see a drop in weight - ANYTHING , anything at all will help.

its my last day in the office this week , have now got in the habit of preparing my own rolls , taking my own water , crisps and snack bar from home as if I use the bakery van that visits its cost around £6 a day and that soon adds up , it feels like a long slog 5 days in a row but the good news is I get to spend the next 5 days at home.

I am not doing too well at this not spending any money malarky - the cost of groceries is just ridiculous right now , we aren't huge eaters and we make from scratch which I am sure is cheaper and we buy in bulk where possible ( dishwasher and washing pods , toilet roll , etc) - I don't see how I can cut this back without having to make nutritional allowances but trying to soldier on. Just eat have now stopped their 50% off fruit and veg on mondays which isn't helpful at all. NM did pop in lidl this morning to see if they had any wonky veg boxes but no such luck. We don't waste food , very little gets thrown away , left overs ( or basically overcooking for 2) goes in to sealed pots in the fridge for lunches but I must still be doing £80 - £100 a week - its ridiculous !! There are no fancy cuts of meat either , we basically get by on Chicken , mince and salmon , the most recent salmon being bought on special in tesco over easter and sliced up in to portions - I know I keep saying it but I am so glad that I am not feeding a growing family right now !!!!!!!

I've tried playing around with the car insurance and cant get it much below the renewal cost , i did try and barter with my current guys but they aren't having it - I will probably for ease just stick with where I am but have to do the renewal by the end of this month else the car won't be insured. The car last year only did 3.5k miles but when I amended this on the quotes it actually made it more expensive - I guess they may have me down as a sunday driver but we rarely use the 2nd car as the mileage shows and expect to use it even less now the new car is ok in ulez etc.

I've bought two tickets to see a comedian Kane Brown in October , have seen a lot of his stuff on tiktok and he has me in fits , as he is more back street comedy the tickets were only £20 each , I probably could have done without spending it but a little date night here and there won't do any harm

efes_shareholder

today is not a good day.

There is a conflict that may not be able to be resolved at home.

NM has spoken to the promotor I dislike and agreed to work his event again for less numerical reimbursement then what we had agreed, That is fine however he has once again chosen not to be up front about this choice and kept it quiet until I have literally forced it out of him ………………afraid of how I would react despite me being doing lots of work in my counselling sessions on my responses. He has taken away the choice of responding in any other way other then hurt , betrayed and disregarded.

I feel this promoter devalues him and has no gratitude to him , I cannot attend the entire week as its been left to the last minute to put any plans in place and quite frankly I have no desire to use my precious annual leave to do so.

I am not sure this can resolved - it is yet another occassion of cutting me out of the loop of big things that do affect me. I am 85% certain I will not go although he now doesnt want too as he expected me just to go along with it and obviously I have reacted from a place of hurt,………………..Its likely I would have had he included me or ran the plans past me but on this occassion he has put the promoter and himself before me - I ranked behind his son with his previous lack of disclosure which I do get but to rank behind a promoter that has massively upset me in the past is a huge stab.

It is what it is ,he has made that choice , a wrong one once again and I sit with the hurt of that and he must sit with whatever the consequences turn out to be, I have told him I am at max capacity of feeling massively let down by him and out of oppurtunities for him to "get it right"

In other news this month has been a hard slog to get to the next pay day still in the black - I'm not sure why , i need to re visit my finances and look at where I am spending - potentially its because its birthday and holiday season and the expenses increase whilst the ability to save diminishes.

Today is a tough day as its my mums birthday , it always hits quite hard - I could do with the unconditional love and a bit of smoke blowing up my rear end but instead I am questioning why my partner manages me rather then values me !!!!!!!

Newstartforme

So sorry you are feeling like this, sounds like NM could have avoided this by being up front. Strange loyalty to the promoter at the expense of the relationship. Did NM think you would not react well to the news ? Not that it's any excuse .Money wise I think is generally tough these days with the fuel rises affecting everything . Happy heavenly birthday to your dear mum xx