Mother is trying to control me still

Kirstie_

Some of you may know my mum tries and controls me. A month or so ago I decided to move in with my boyfriend.

She wasn't happy, she ignored me for a week, then a few weeks ago she decided to come and see me, apologised for the "none talking". After she left I notice my medication had gone, I thought nothing more of it. I go doctor and get some more. My mum comes round again and again they go missing.

This time she tells me my boyfriend is cheating on me, he is throwing my tablets away and generally hates me. I'm apparently not eating enough or have any food in (My boyfriends gone to the extent or 2 fryers, toasters etc) trying to mess with my head (at times its working).

My dad just wants the peace keeping, I can't tell my boyfriend as he will go into full protection mode and have it out with my mother, I try and talk to her and she dismisses me.

She has also got in touch with my ex who she approved of and got him to start trying to get back with me, he isn't taking no for an answer because he is listening to my mum.

I really don't know what to do. I know my boyfriend isn't cheating on me. I just want to escape this, don't know how though.

I'm thinking of just cutting contact but a part of me says thats a step too far.

PeacefulWaters

Cut her off.

If you can't do it, Google "Gray rock parent".

Mojisola

Kirstie_ wrote: »

She wasn't happy, she ignored me for a week, then a few weeks ago she decided to come and see me

I'm thinking of just cutting contact but a part of me says thats a step too far.

What's going to happen if you don't cut contact? More of the same!

Tell your BF what she's been doing and don't let her in if she comes to the house.

AylesburyDuck

Talk to your boyfriend about this, and it's not a bad thing if he does go into full protection mode.
As for your Mother, she sounds totally toxic, maybe its time for you to go no contact with her.
A mother that could take medication from her daughter with no thought to the results, isnt worth giving two thoughts about.

Poor_Single_lady

Seems a bit ridiculous not to tell your boyfriend about something so important.

Not to mention hard to believe.

Robisere

Speak to your dad alone and try to make him face the situation. Tell him that, if your mother does not stop all this nonsense, you will continue to see dad, but cut all contact with mum. If dad won't agree to talk to your mum, tell him that you love them both, but cannot stand any more interference in your life: it is your life and you should be allowed to live it as an adult, with adult choices. You will stop seeing them both, which will hurt you very badly, but you will do that if that is what it takes to preserve your independence.

Remembering my own control freak mother from many years ago: Good Luck!

neneromanova

Have a look here and read some other peoples stories. Then post your story and see what they say. But I think I know the answer, and that will be to cut all ties with her! She sounds evil.


https://www.reddit.com/r/JUSTNOMIL/

Kirstie_

Thank you for all the people who have offered advice. It is appreciated.

I know I should tell my boyfriend. I don't want him worrying. I'm scared if he says something if she comes she will make a mountain out of a molehill

lika_86

You had a lot of good advice in a previous thread. It sounds like little has changed.

All I can say is that if your hope is that your boyfriend becomes your partner in life then you have to talk to him about things like this because they're clearly causing you a lot of stress.

Kirstie_

I do need to tell him, I just don't want him worrying.

DigForVictory

So show him the thread, and all the links. Then explain.
Worry is relative - you think he hasn't noticed your mum's behaviour?