Visiting tradesman -your responsibility?

AnotherJoe

Savvy_Sue wrote: »

Yes, but ... unless it's mounted on a couple of posts / bollards, the OP is going to have to agree to have one side mounted on her property, no?

You can get freestanding bollards, although there'd be a risk that they might 'walk' or just be moved. Although I think they would deter the casual school parkers ...

A small hook. Don't see an issue

bouicca21

I think I'd be harking back to student days and pinching a couple of traffic cones to place on the lane.

Davesnave

I think it's up to the OP to decide what's 'acceptable;' not us.

Plenty of houses have street signs and other notices on them, other people's gate posts stuck next to them, electricity wires secured to them, hooks in walls etc.

It's no big deal to those owners who are perhaps less 'territorial' than some on here!

YoungBlueEyes

I'm a bit late to this post but I've just read it all and I have a couple of suggestions.

1. Re the people parking in the lane/bollard/sign issue - could yous not paint a nice big red "no entry" circle on the ground? With the owners permission of course. That would hopefully stop the school run cars etc, but not, say, ambulances etc.

2. Re him banging on your door and ringing the bell. (This is a Plan B for if the get-together doesn't work.) Maybe a shock tactic would work? One day when you're home all day, and he's in banging+ringing like a maniac mode, answer the door in a clear state of distress. Bit of prep required like, back comb your hair, mascara all down your face, work yourself up into a proper crying + shaking mess, then answer the door with "you've got to STOP this! Look at what you're DOING to me! You're really scaring me and I don't know if I can TAKE it any more!!" Lots of sobbing and shaking and wiping of nose on palm of hand. "I'm sorry, I can't HELP where people park but you're driving me CRAZY with all this and YOU HAVE TO STOP!!" Sob sob shakey shakey.

Like that. I've done this before and it worked an absolute treat.

Then close the door on him, have a stiff drink, and lament how we've put feminism back 20 years.

moneyistooshorttomention

YoungBlueEyes wrote: »

I'm a bit late to this post but I've just read it all and I have a couple of suggestions.

1. Re the people parking in the lane/bollard/sign issue - could yous not paint a nice big red "no entry" circle on the ground? With the owners permission of course. That would hopefully stop the school run cars etc, but not, say, ambulances etc.

2. Re him banging on your door and ringing the bell. (This is a Plan B for if the get-together doesn't work.) Maybe a shock tactic would work? One day when you're home all day, and he's in banging+ringing like a maniac mode, answer the door in a clear state of distress. Bit of prep required like, back comb your hair, mascara all down your face, work yourself up into a proper crying + shaking mess, then answer the door with "you've got to STOP this! Look at what you're DOING to me! You're really scaring me and I don't know if I can TAKE it any more!!" Lots of sobbing and shaking and wiping of nose on palm of hand. "I'm sorry, I can't HELP where people park but you're driving me CRAZY with all this and YOU HAVE TO STOP!!" Sob sob shakey shakey.

Like that. I've done this before and it worked an absolute treat.

Then close the door on him, have a stiff drink, and lament how we've put feminism back 20 years.

Not a tactic I would advocate personally - I've had someone "in the wrong" (ie a flytipper - so yep...most definitely in the wrong) trying a variant on me.

It didn't work - I was going to persist with calling a flytipper a flytipper:)

....and...yep....I'll admit that once the looks (such as they were) had aged (darn it:(:rotfl:- but at least they werent transfixed by my boobs any longer looking at the plus side:cool:) I stopped using "feminine wiles" and just say factual things like "I'm not strong enough to lift/do so-and-so. Can I ask you to for me please:)". They do it - job done. So I'm not in favour of pulling that stunt myself - on the whole I think it's pretty discredited these days....

TBagpuss

YoungBlueEyes wrote: »

2. Re him banging on your door and ringing the bell. (This is a Plan B for if the get-together doesn't work.) Maybe a shock tactic would work? One day when you're home all day, and he's in banging+ringing like a maniac mode, answer the door in a clear state of distress. Bit of prep required like, back comb your hair, mascara all down your face, work yourself up into a proper crying + shaking mess, then answer the door with "you've got to STOP this! Look at what you're DOING to me! You're really scaring me and I don't know if I can TAKE it any more!!" Lots of sobbing and shaking and wiping of nose on palm of hand. "I'm sorry, I can't HELP where people park but you're driving me CRAZY with all this and YOU HAVE TO STOP!!" Sob sob shakey shakey.

Like that. I've done this before and it worked an absolute treat.

Then close the door on him, have a stiff drink, and lament how we've put feminism back 20 years.

I once accidentally did almost the opposite. I was in the middle of jointing a hare and due to my lack of familiarity with its anatomy, and the less than ideal knife it got quite messy.
My doorbell rang, and assuming it was my parents, who were due to arrive, I went to the door as I was.
The Jehovah's Witnesses on the doorstep took one look at this rather stressed looking woman with blood on her hands and apron, and a large, bloody knife in one had, and said 'er, this doesn't look like a good time. We can come back later..' (And then we went from them showing up about once every three months, to not showing up at all for about 2 years, which was an unexpected bonus!)

moneyistooshorttomention

TBagpuss wrote: »

I once accidentally did almost the opposite. I was in the middle of jointing a hare and due to my lack of familiarity with its anatomy, and the less than ideal knife it got quite messy.
My doorbell rang, and assuming it was my parents, who were due to arrive, I went to the door as I was.
The Jehovah's Witnesses on the doorstep took one look at this rather stressed looking woman with blood on her hands and apron, and a large, bloody knife in one had, and said 'er, this doesn't look like a good time. We can come back later..' (And then we went from them showing up about once every three months, to not showing up at all for about 2 years, which was an unexpected bonus!)

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl: I shouldnt laugh should I....(ahem...being a vegetarian).

Personally - I think I might have seen the "first and last" of JW's calling here when I said "No thanks. I'm not interested......but she might be" - and pointed in the direction of the nfh next door. That was very wicked of me wasnt it?:rotfl::rotfl: But they haven't been back again since.....:)

YoungBlueEyes

Yep I agree. A flytipper is a flytipper is a flytipper. Histrionics outta someone who is clearly in the wrong is pathetic and would leave me unmoved too.

But this ain't that.

OP is a woman on her own (if I remember correctly) being harrassed/hassled by a man who won't stop. No matter if the lane is his and it's his right to not have people parking on it, for whatever their reason. That does not excuse his actions, which are far and away above what would be considered a reasonable response. He's annoyed and angry that people aren't listening to him when he's making a perfectly reasonable request. I know people aren't perfect, and you can tell a tradesman 100 times not to park here but park over there please and they'll sometimes just do as they like.

But this is a man with a temper, who does not listen to reason, and will not be swayed from his position. IMO it's not acceptable for him to be banging on my door at length and leaning on my doorbell every time someone parks there. Has anyone else had this done to them? Neighbours I mean. Or is it just you OP? Added to that the fact that the police didn't provide any help, I'd do this if I thought it would bring an end to it, whether it was discredited or not.

YoungBlueEyes

As for discouraging JW's/cold callers/door knockers or whoever, I have 2 effective + well-used tactics.
Depending what kind of mood I'm in I'll either say "Sure I'd love to hear all about it, but first you must let me tell you how the loving light of Lucifer has completely changed my life". Or if I can't be bothered I just say (very poshly, no accent, rounded vowels) "Oh I am so sorry, but I don't speak a word of English", then smile sweetly and close the door.

ETA What does nfh stand for? I can't work it out...

Lavendyr

I don't get why everyone is saying the OP and neighbours should have to put up signs etc! Surely if the neighbour is this bothered he should be doing these things himself! In the meantime I'd keep a log of his harrassment and report him to the police as needed. I would certainly report the vandalism and mention suspicions re neighbour!