Friend splitting costs with partner

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Hi, before I start I'll say this really has nothing to do with me and I'm not actually going to do anything with peoples opinions or talk about it with my friend as he's pretty hard headed at the best of times.

However, I'm genuinely interested in how people see this situation.

So... My friend purchased a house last year his partner was going to live with him from the start and she still does . He provided all of the deposit the entire amount and she added nothing as she had no savings. Because of this he made her sign a legal document to say if they break up he owns all the house ect( whether this would stand up in court is besides the point) anyway he was always adamant its his house and she doesn't pay anything towards it to not complicate things in a legal sense I.e the mortgage.

He did however, agree at the time to take £200 a month from her to cover other bills and he still does. Not the problem being I spoke to him the other day and he's struggling with money as most new home owners do due to outlay and maintenance costs his house also needs a new roof ect. His partner isn't helping at all with the cost of the house I.e roof ect and in my opinion isn't even covering her own living with £200 a month. He buys all the food and everything she pays £200 to him and that's it.

Do people think this is fair, neither are high earners he gets about £600 more a month in that region than her and she will be on about £1200 give or take. Essentially meaning he has no spare money pays for everything and she has over £1000 disposable income a month.

At the start when he wouldn't add her to the mortgage I thought it was quite mean as they had been together for a few years but at this point I think she's just taking advantage a bit and could definetly offer to help more regardless of a stake in the mortgage or not.
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  • thorsoak
    thorsoak Posts: 7,166 Forumite
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    Surely it is none of your business?
  • gettingtheresometime
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    He can't have it both ways.


    Either he accepts that she pays towards the mortgage/maintenance costs and that she may have a case for claiming some of the house or he sucks it up and accepts that he has bigger outgoings in terms of mortgage/maintenance costs & as a result has less spendable cash.


    Bills are a different matter though. Was this £200 plucked out of the air or was the bills calculated in some way. It does sound as if £200 is an extremely good deal for her, especially if that includes food (he hasn't got a spare room I could have does he?).


    Perhaps they need to have a talk about the split of bills before it becomes a source of resentment or in the very least he needs to visit mse for some tips to reduce his bills!
  • Pdbaggett
    Pdbaggett Posts: 111 Forumite
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    thorsoak wrote: »
    Surely it is none of your business?

    Yes I'm aware. Considering i literally said that in the opening sentence :rotfl:

    :T
  • Pdbaggett
    Pdbaggett Posts: 111 Forumite
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    He can't have it both ways.


    Either he accepts that she pays towards the mortgage/maintenance costs and that she may have a case for claiming some of the house or he sucks it up and accepts that he has bigger outgoings in terms of mortgage/maintenance costs & as a result has less spendable cash.


    Bills are a different matter though. Was this £200 plucked out of the air or was the bills calculated in some way. It does sound as if £200 is an extremely good deal for her, especially if that includes food (he hasn't got a spare room I could have does he?).


    Perhaps they need to have a talk about the split of bills before it becomes a source of resentment or in the very least he needs to visit mse for some tips to reduce his bills!

    Totally agree on that one and I told him at the time not adding her to the mortgage is asking for trouble. I just think £50 a week for all of your bills and food is a ridiculously good deal regardless of a claim to the equity in the house or not.
  • gettingtheresometime
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    Pdbaggett wrote: »
    Totally agree on that one and I told him at the time not adding her to the mortgage is asking for trouble. I just think £50 a week for all of your bills and food is a ridiculously good deal regardless of a claim to the equity in the house or not.

    I can see his logic on that one but like you I think £50 is an amazing deal.
  • Comms69
    Comms69 Posts: 14,229 Forumite
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    Pdbaggett wrote: »
    Totally agree on that one and I told him at the time not adding her to the mortgage is asking for trouble. I just think £50 a week for all of your bills and food is a ridiculously good deal regardless of a claim to the equity in the house or not.
    Well £400 for bills etc is about right for a household of two.


    Its the food element that needs to be addressed.
  • PrettyKittyKat
    PrettyKittyKat Posts: 1,270 Forumite
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    to be honest I wouldn't want to be his partner! I'd hate to be treated like a lodger by my partner. It is different if he already owned the house and she moved in, however they bought the house when they were already together. Personally this would ring alarm bells in regards to my partners commitment to the relationship and expected longevity of it! She's not taking advantage of him, she's just doing what he asked, as you say he is quite hard headed.
  • Robisere
    Robisere Posts: 3,237 Forumite
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    The "legal document" your friend had his partner sign, has no actual legal standing. It is her address and has been for however long she has lived there, therefore she is, in law, legally domiciled there. They have been cohabiting at that address for the same period. However much or little that she contributes, has no bearing upon the situation.

    How long has your friend owned the house and paid the mortgage? I suspect that the roof and other repair/maintenance issues, could have been spotted by paying for a good Survey at the time of buying the property. That is a mistake many people make.

    Btw, if you mean to say "etcetera" the abreviation is "etc" and not "ect".
    I think this job really needs
    a much bigger hammer.
  • Comms69
    Comms69 Posts: 14,229 Forumite
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    Robisere wrote: »
    The "legal document" your friend had his partner sign, has no actual legal standing. It is her address and has been for however long she has lived there, therefore she is, in law, legally domiciled there. They have been cohabiting at that address for the same period. However much or little that she contributes, has no bearing upon the situation.

    How long has your friend owned the house and paid the mortgage? I suspect that the roof and other repair/maintenance issues, could have been spotted by paying for a good Survey at the time of buying the property. That is a mistake many people make.

    Btw, if you mean to say "etcetera" the abreviation is "etc" and not "ect".


    But being legally domiciled somewhere has no legal protection...
  • Pollycat
    Pollycat Posts: 34,764 Forumite
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    Pdbaggett wrote: »
    Hi, before I start I'll say this really has nothing to do with me and I'm not actually going to do anything with peoples opinions or talk about it with my friend as he's pretty hard headed at the best of times.

    However, I'm genuinely interested in how people see this situation.

    So... My friend purchased a house last year his partner was going to live with him from the start and she still does . He provided all of the deposit the entire amount and she added nothing as she had no savings. Because of this he made her sign a legal document to say if they break up he owns all the house ect( whether this would stand up in court is besides the point) anyway he was always adamant its his house and she doesn't pay anything towards it to not complicate things in a legal sense I.e the mortgage.

    He did however, agree at the time to take £200 a month from her to cover other bills and he still does. Not the problem being I spoke to him the other day and he's struggling with money as most new home owners do due to outlay and maintenance costs his house also needs a new roof ect. His partner isn't helping at all with the cost of the house I.e roof ect and in my opinion isn't even covering her own living with £200 a month. He buys all the food and everything she pays £200 to him and that's it.

    Do people think this is fair, neither are high earners he gets about £600 more a month in that region than her and she will be on about £1200 give or take. Essentially meaning he has no spare money pays for everything and she has over £1000 disposable income a month.

    At the start when he wouldn't add her to the mortgage I thought it was quite mean as they had been together for a few years but at this point I think she's just taking advantage a bit and could definetly offer to help more regardless of a stake in the mortgage or not.
    It doesn't matter whether you or any posters think it's fair or not fair.

    He set the £200 per month.
    He doesn't want his partner to have any stake in the house.
    He's (presumably) not complaining about the situation.
    You're not going to do anything about the situation.

    It sounds like a MMD with more information than usual thrown in.
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