Pregnant and single, all in the same day!

pennypuppy

You are up to it and you will have a child that will be worth more than anything else in your life. Seriously, be happy - nothing else matters. Your concern just shows what a good mum you will be already.

Tulip

Congratulations

purplegirluk1

My parents were very upset when we told them about our baby. They too think we can't afford it and that we should own our home first and be more settled. Well we are settled and feel its the right time so as far as they are concerned we will agree to disagree. Saying that it hasn't stopped them, well atleast my mum being involved so far. I have found the softly softly approach works best. I haven't forced it upon them and they are coming round, they are even buying us a cot bed, something I could not imagine them doing three months ago!!!

People have been having babies for a very long time and if you are dedicated and you want your baby then there is no way you will let it go without. Where theres a will theres a way and if you make use of everything that is available to you ie maternity pay, benefits, general help from anyone willing to be involved you will be fine. Its a daunting thing but money really isn't the most important thing. You have eight months to prepare, the January sales will be great for baby bargains. Your midwife will support you and will be able to give you so much advice, especially about help in your area.

Rest and relax now, the most important thing for you and baby is to keep well. You have plenty of time to plan. Believe me your Mum will come round to the idea. My mum is the most non-maternal woman ever, she has 5 grandchildren already and she is coping fine now.

Purplegirl

XxX

pennypuppy

:TPurplegirluk1 is right! Well said.

crispeater

my kids are 2 & 4 and january sales are still a life saver for me, i buy loads in the sales to keep them going through the year. saves me an absolute fortune!

lindsaygalaxy

Congratulations!

You may actually find it easier, only one kid to look after instead of two! Im sure your parents will support you, mine have beena amazing and meant i still get to go out sometimes still!

If you strat buying now you will find it easierm everything from clothes to nappies!. Join all the baby clubs eg tesco, pampers, boots... to getlots of vouchers and freebies,

Also if you are on a low income or benefits there is a grant for about £500 i believeyou can get to help with initial costs.

P.S. Is there anychance the babies father wont come back? He may just be in shock and you tellign him you are pregnant may just need time to sink in.

Either way stay in touch, people on here are wonderful and will help in any way we all can.

pinkshoes

Your mum will no doubt be really supporting when it sinks in that she's gonna be a grandmother!! She's probably just in shock that this isn't exactly how she saw your life panning out... but she'll get over it soon!

How long were you with your b/f for?? Did you tell him about the baby? Maybe he'll feel differently when he's had time to digest it all! Men are strange creatures and react irrationally to things they're scared of.

clu

Congrats,!!!! through all the emotion just now I would recommend you sit down and get organised. You are completely able to do this, it will be hard and tiring but there is always a way. I am 37 weeks preg just now and although am not a single parent , I am the wage earner as DP is a student. My practical advice (as i also have mortgage and car payments!) is sit down and work out money for the next few months. Try and save as much as possible, I presume you will go back to work so work out how much you will need for mat leave.

I say start saving now because I planned to work as late as poss but had to leave work at 33 weeks for medical reasons. Once your baby is here you dont want to be worrying about money.

You can get great bargains off ebay, look for the newborn bundles look around for what you really need. There is a lot of things you would like but dont really need. Also people start to offer things so just ensure you have the basics to get you started.

With your mum, it may change once you have a scan she sees the baby is real, babies do amazing things to the people you think are the hardest. Im sorry so much has happened so quickly have a good cry and then make sure he knows he will be financially contributing to his child !

Doozergirl

I was 21 too. My OH totally freaked out and we split up too for a time through his reaction to the news! He's a bit older than me, the great idiot, but he thought we didn't have enough to give a child. He was so wrong!

It was really hard time - it is anyway, without any additional stress, but being a mum will just focus you in a way you never thought possible. You will get through this, you will have the world's most precious gift to you soon and it won't matter what life throws at you when you have such good reason to succeed and so much love to give

rheme

I was 21 when I had my son and divorced at 23 with a mortgage and all the usual adult responsibilities.

It is a daunting prospect being a single parent but as previous posters have said you will get a lot of support from your friends, family and colleagues on these boards.

I always remember looking at my son when he was a little boy and wondering how on earth I was going to get him to the other end on my own ... but I did .... he is now 29 years old and doing really well in life but that aside, I like and love him for who he is not what he is. We are very close even though he lives 200 miles away, he has a wonderful girlfriend and I am looking forward to being told to go and buy 'the hat'.

He is my achievement in life and I just know that in the future you will feel the same and probably pass on your experiences on to others.

It CAN be done you just need to believe in yourself. The best thing you can do is give your baby your time, love and honesty .... material things come secondary.

One of the nicest parts is when they come home and say .... THANKYOU. It just so makes it worthwhile.

Congratulations, good luck and stay strong.