Rented House advice

Money_maker

Paul_Jones_1984 wrote: »

Yes, I want to avoid confrontation, unless absolutely necessary.
I want everything handled in a calm manner.

Ex girlfriend tested me again today, so I am hoping to actually meet and be back into the house this weekend.

Cant see that happening - at all.


You seem to be very calm about it all, wanting to talk through her options etc etc. But if she were I, I would not want to meet, I would not want to talk, I would just keep you away as far as I could, hanging on as long as I could with my feet firmly placed in your house. Using your utilities, your furniture, your bank account, maybe ordering a few items in your name for delivery for me to your house. Paying not a single penny and laughing myself silly at your foolishness and fear of her. Why do you think she will be reasonable when the alternative is so attractive to her? Maybe she'll get a big burly lodger and actually make some money from her lucky situation or maybe just a big new boyfriend.

Slithery

Paul_Jones_1984 wrote: »

Not sure why you think I'm from a certain community, if that's what you're hinting at?
I've always been politically compliant and always will.

Don't worry, that's not what Slinky was getting at at all. They were just referring to a couple of other previous threads on this board that have gone on for hundreds of posts without the OP taking any of our advice.

Just an in joke with no offence meant

Paul_Jones_1984

Money_maker wrote: »

Cant see that happening - at all.


You seem to be very calm about it all, wanting to talk through her options etc etc. But if she were I, I would not want to meet, I would not want to talk, I would just keep you away as far as I could, hanging on as long as I could with my feet firmly placed in your house. Using your utilities, your furniture, your bank account, maybe ordering a few items in your name for delivery for me to your house. Paying not a single penny and laughing myself silly at your foolishness and fear of her. Why do you think she will be reasonable when the alternative is so attractive to her? Maybe she'll get a big burly lodger and actually make some money from her lucky situation or maybe just a big new boyfriend.

But she does want to meet. And she does want to go to the council offices with me. That's why SHE texted me earlier.

What does she have to fear from ripping me off? Well, same as I have to fear from the landlord I guess? CCJ etc. Not that I'd bother trying to take her to court, but in theory I guess I could. It's a bit of a domino effect, I'd say. Of course she can mess me around and then in turn I mess the landlord and utilities around. But at the end of the day I've got a bed to sleep in. Worst case scenario for me, bailiffs take my dad's TV and maybe £20 a week from my wages. Worst case for her, bailiffs evict and she ends up in B&B via council.

I've told her on the phone, that I'm actually just a middle man in all this. I can walk away and let her, the council and the landlord argue it out amongst themselves. Yes, I'd get a CCJ and lose my furniture and deposit. But eventually she will get evicted and it seems she does now realise this. We actually agreed that the most important thing is for the council not to class her as intentional homeless. Or even if they do, at least start talking to them about it now, not last minute once the bailiffs have evicted her.

NB I'm not saying I AM going to walk away from this, I'm SAYING TO HER that I COULD.

Paul_Jones_1984

Slithery wrote: »

Don't worry, that's not what Slinky was getting at at all. They were just referring to a couple of other previous threads on this board that have gone on for hundreds of posts without the OP taking any of our advice.

Just an in joke with no offence meant

Well, I can't take offense, at something that doesn't apply to me!

Slithery

Paul_Jones_1984 wrote: »

What does she have to fear from ripping me off? Well, same as I have to fear from the landlord I guess? CCJ etc.

Nope, she has nothing to fear.

The landlord can't get a CCJ against her as she isn't liable for any of the rent/bills, you are.

Paul_Jones_1984

Slithery wrote: »

Nope, she has nothing to fear.

The landlord can't get a CCJ against her as she isn't liable for any of the rent/bills, you are.

I meant I could get a CCJ against her, perhaps. But I wouldn't bother, because I know I'd never get any money back anyway. Because she doesn't have any.

Paul_Jones_1984

Slithery wrote: »

Nope, she has nothing to fear.

The landlord can't get a CCJ against her as she isn't liable for any of the rent/bills, you are.

She fears ending up in a B&B or hostel etc.
She's going to end up at the mercy of the council sooner or later.
But she's starting to realise that it's better for her to tackle that with me on side, and not leave it to last minute.

Paul_Jones_1984

How could ex GF use my bank account?
I'm in my dad's house right now and he still gets statements by post. I could open one, but I don't see how that would enable me to use his account?

Do you mean if a new card and PIN arrive and she opens both?

FBaby

I don't think OP is selfish or a coward, but I'm wondering whether there might some learning difficulties or autistic traits. If that is the case, it's even more concerning that she could have planned it all and very much using OP to suits her needs.

OP, please seek some help and advice. You are so desperately trying to avoid doing things in a confrontation way but your plans to do things amicably are not going to work for you. She doesn't need you to go to the council with her and when are you going to do so when you say yourself you are at work during the day?

The council is not going to pay for the full rent (even if the LL agreed to it which is highly unlikely) and they are not going to rehouse her tomorrow. At best, they'll put her on a waiting list and it could take months before they find her somewhere. In the meantime, you will be the mug paying or facing the consequences for not paying.

You seem prepare to take the hit and it seems the easiest solution at the moment, but it won't be when you'll have to confront your LL and go to court. If you think taking actions to evict your ex is stressful, this will be nothing compared to the stress of dealing with your LL, court and bailiffs.

Don't trust your ex. She is telling you what you want to hear to buy some time. She knows exactly what her position is and at the moment, what's in her interest is to ensure you don't do what everyone here has been telling you to do.

She is using you is the most callous ways, so please do seek support so that you take action to get her out, NOW!

[Deleted User]

Unless your dad has receipts to hand for every object in the house bar bed/bedding (for his bed), a couple of chairs, one TV (possibly) everything else could be taken away with a huge amount of stress and embarrassment (do you think your parents will want to see vans pulling up outside your house, furniture being taken to them while the neighbours look on?)

You do have to get real. Your attitude is really quite ridiculous. There's relaxed and there's comatose (with head so far down you can't breath)

Why did you bother to come on here if you aren't going to take any advice?