Earthgirl's Final Battle

earthgirl2

So my priorities when returning to MSE were:
Goals / areas I am working on:
- Cheaply have quality time with DH (this has been good for the most part)
- cheaply have quality time with kids (they are 7 and 10 and soon may not want to know me!!) (Tend to splurge on this)
- Look after our health whilst being mindful of cost - e.g. don't get a personal trainer! (doing great)
- reduce stress but try not to over spend on convenience (pretty good)
- make sure time management is good - again without over spending on convenience - so that I can do a good job at work.
- do some decorating (done nothing but OH in charge of this. I have no words to describe his tortoise-like approach to DIY)
- stay in contact with family despite not seeing them much (good)
- Use what I have to make sure I look presentable! (Spent a bit on this - £27 hair cut)

So I am mostly doing quite well. Noticeably I need to try not to splurge on the kids or spend any more on myself. It's so hard for them to see friends for various reasons mostly pandemic related, so I end up taking them to something that you have to pay for that I normally wouldn't bother with.

I am having a big push on 5 areas this month, areas that I have decided take far to much of my energy and just need a concerted effort to either get it totally on track, or get rid of it completely. I find it so motivating and wake up ready to 'go and get it done' if I have a few small areas to focus on!
1. DS1 being unhappy at school. Don't want to give too much info on here, but this takes a lot of my energy. I have sent an email and had two discussions with the head teacher - the last one quite heated. We have seen a massive improvement since that one, where I suggested an independent investigation. It's unlike me to be so forward but totally necessary for them to get things sorted out. Fingers crossed this one is crossed off the list now!
2. Exercising regularly, losing  a few pounds. I started running again and the weight is coming off. Being stricter with myself for one month is doable.
3. Feeling closer to OH - work in progress. Might plan a movie night this week.
4. Work is under control. Massive effort on this lately and it is pretty much done.
5. Work oh OHs business. I've decided to spend 2 mornings on this and 'get ahead'.

I had to turn down the babysitting job, it was very, very time consuming and stressful. Better to focus my efforts on tutoring which makes me more money and is much easier.

Karmacat

Wow, earthie, it sounds like things are going so well - not quite ticking over yet, but definitely on the way there.  Good for you  

beanielou

You are very busy bee. 

earthgirl2

Thank you Beanie and Karma.
I'm doing what I can to just make things a lot better. We have spent too long with things just not being quite right. Although I am not striving for perfection, I really feel motivated this month to get stuff done. I'm so lucky to have things pretty good, and nothing really to complain about, but my complacency takes a lot of my brain space, and I think I could give to others and support others more if I had a bit more positive energy!
Hosted my friend last night alfresco under the garage door, just to see her and cheer her up. We had booked to go out and the new rules saw that cancelled- but a few candles and my driveway was transformed (NOT). Anyway we had a good time for a couple of hours until we both couldnt feel our legs   
I'm hosting my MIL tomorrow, we are her bubble. I know of a lot of people that are not following the rules at all and have just said F it. I'm not there yet, I can do this 
 I've done a lot of work on OHs business, and the things I can't do I've asked for training on from business gateway. I've maybe got another 4 or 5 days to spend on this even without training - trying to carve out the time this week, but with the kids off school and nothing open and nobody to play with, I'm going to have to amuse them/play with them/ put my energy into this.
Struggling with DS1 and him being unhappy. I think I need to get him to be more positive in general, and enjoy time with family and be kinder to himself.

apple_muncher

I don't understand people not following the rules! It is a serious virus and we don't exactly know how it spreads, so keeping a sensible  distance is the right thing to do. So go you, keeping to them there rules x

Our garage is about 100m from the house, so hosting anyone and anything in there would look well dodgy - specially given the amount of junk kept in there...

Hope you can find ways to help ds1.

earthgirl2

I can see people's point about following the rules, that is what we are doing. I can see others point about not caring anymore but I don't feel that way!

In my October focus on getting things done, I had a little mole removed from my chest yesterday. I was told 2 stitches max by the doc. I ended up with a 2cm gash over a bone and seven stitches so I'm feeling a bit sore! The week off has been fine though, using it to save and make money, catch up on things that need to be done and spending time with the kids. 

Money making
worked on ohs business and completed 3 online lessons.

money saving
using up random items from cupboards and freezer this week as I'm off work and have more time to cook said random items
keeping things simple in the school holidays for the kids, Walks, bike rides etc

managing expectations around Halloween (maybe treasure hunt in the garden?) and Xmas to keep spends low. 

apple_muncher

Hope the soreness is going away now.

Unlike the virus - it is still out there and not following the rules is just plain daft! We've had just 1 confirmed case at sch and some staff thought that they had to isolate and get a test. What?? It's not hard:  15 mins within 1m of someone who then tests positive = you need to isolate. If you have been doing as told = no need to isolate. I have no wish to risk it!

How is ds1 doing?

Karmacat

Hiya earthie - I don't follow the rules, I follow my own, and they're a *lot* stricter!  Hope the mole heals quickly - the skin is so thin in some places, it takes a while.

earthgirl2

Thanks Karma and apple. Feeling much better and I have used the resting time wisely and caught up on both of your diaries! I did a bit of leg strength work yesterday, and a walk today.

I feel a lot more motivated to move us forward now from my reading - thanks!

DS1 is ok thanks, I have enjoyed lots of relaxing family time with him this week. We have all looked at strategies that improve our mood, and have a list of them to refer to and use on a noticeboard. The activity can be found here if anyone else thinks it useful. https://dreamaplay.com/mental-health-checkup-toolkit/

If he is feeling sad/down/lonely etc. he (or any of us!) can go to the board and pick an activity to do. It does seem to be working. We are focusing on him feeling strong, having power over his thoughts and feelings, and feeling loved here. I'd like him to be busier too - pre lockdown he was such an active child most things are cancelled now -  so I'll try to keep getting him out and having kids here to play as per the rules. I'm sure that this, and a better approach by his school, will really help.

earthgirl2

Beanie I have now caught up with your diary! But I suppose I really need to stop resting and get back to it!
Pretty good today, I got everything done on the to do list. A few money saving/ making things were:

• Continued new job application for more online teaching, requested more hours from my current company.
• Took clothes to the weigh in shop. I got £3.15 but better than nothing.
• Did a top up shop £17 eek - Included a stock up on cat food, crisps and cheese. Don't want to have to be told to isolate without these items  but will do better with grocery budget from now.
• Did a little bit of work on OHs business where all seems good from my point of view.
• I am going to try and wear a bra tomorrow in the hope it doesn't aggravate my stitches. I didn't want to fork out for a soft bra in the meantime so I went to work in my swimming costume today 
• Hired a car at work to save me on personal petrol spends.

A successful day for all in the earthgirl household (sorry earthgirl2 household  ) and the children seem happy.
So things to do:
Back to the grindstone with weightloss and healthy eating tomorrow when I can wear a bra! Actually I can do the healthy eating bit anytime, regardless of undergarments - that was a poor excuse  
clear work to do list