“Rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life.”

Cherryfudge

Have you any annual leave accrued? One thing with being off sick is that people get behind with their leave and end up trying to get it all in at the last moment, but it might help with childcare.

Chrystal

Wannabe are you much worse off financially if you stop work and stay at home?

It seems that there'e going to be enormous amounts of stress on you to find childcare, and with littlest the way she is it's probably going to happen quite a lot. Maybe things will improve in the future but in the meantime I think you have to try and make things as easy for yourself as possible. Is there any work you could do from home, so that when littlest is able to be at school you have something to occupy your mind?

I hope she improves soon and starts to feel a little better. It must be so hard for you to see her like this. ((hugs)) X

WannabeFree

We don't get AL I don't think Cherry because we get school holidays. I'll speak to them tomorrow. I can't see it going down well even though they are understanding

I don't think I'm any better off for working Chrystal other than not being 'just on benefits'. Taking childcare and things I pay now (rent/council tax etc) I'd probably be better off on benefits

She is improving, definitely not getting worse now (fingers crossed). It just takes a while to step down all the help she's using back down to a level school are happy to take her at. She's been awake more today and 'dressed' her teddy and requested I buy some clothes for her babies and lift the flap books :rotfl: So she must be feeling better too.

Chrystal

WannabeFree wrote: »

We don't get AL I don't think Cherry because we get school holidays. I'll speak to them tomorrow. I can't see it going down well even though they are understanding

I don't think I'm any better off for working Chrystal other than not being 'just on benefits'. Taking childcare and things I pay now (rent/council tax etc) I'd probably be better off on benefits

She is improving, definitely not getting worse now (fingers crossed). It just takes a while to step down all the help she's using back down to a level school are happy to take her at. She's been awake more today and 'dressed' her teddy and requested I buy some clothes for her babies and lift the flap books :rotfl: So she must be feeling better too.

But Wannabe you aren't 'just on benefits' - you're the full time carer of a child who needs constant help. If she had to be cared for by the state it would cost a lot more than the benefits you get, so please stop putting yourself down. My OH is disabled and I've been a full time carer for many years, so I know how hard it can be, and having to deal with a little one with the problems she's got must be much harder. You just don't need the stress of trying to find childcare to go to work, especially when people feel unable to look after her properly. Give up the job, look after the little one when needs be, and on the occasions that she can go to school enjoy a little bit of free time for yourself.... I think everyone would agree that you deserve it! ( I hope this comes across in the way I intend it to, I think you deserve a medal!) X

WannabeFree

Recommended a Friend to Nat!onwide, that should provide £100 in the next month or so if it goes through okay. Would be a bonus!

Had the holiday in May confirmed - Can have the week I want. Waiting to hear about Easter and October.

If Easter dates aren't available then I think smalls want a birthday party. They understand they can't have both. Holiday is far cheaper though

I think they'd have a joint party between the 3 of them (all 3 birthdays within 2 weeks) not only to cut the costs but I don't think alot of people will want to come to 3 parties over 2 weeks for the same household. Smalls are happy with sharing so long as each other get to invite their own friends.

WannabeFree

Chrystal wrote: »

But Wannabe you aren't 'just on benefits' - you're the full time carer of a child who needs constant help. If she had to be cared for by the state it would cost a lot more than the benefits you get, so please stop putting yourself down. My OH is disabled and I've been a full time carer for many years, so I know how hard it can be, and having to deal with a little one with the problems she's got must be much harder. You just don't need the stress of trying to find childcare to go to work, especially when people feel unable to look after her properly. Give up the job, look after the little one when needs be, and on the occasions that she can go to school enjoy a little bit of free time for yourself.... I think everyone would agree that you deserve it! ( I hope this comes across in the way I intend it to, I think you deserve a medal!) X

Thank you and it definitely comes across the right way and not wrong.

I think it's something I'm going to have to think about even though I didn't want too I have nothing against anyone on benefits and I hope I don't come across that way.

I just know it will be something else in my Mum's eyes I failed her by and an embarrassment to her. This is totally how she would see it and she probably wouldn't speak to me

Chrystal

But honey that doesn't make sense, how can it be an embarrassment to her for you to be looking after a very poorly child? Where would she expect her to be left while you went to work? Doesn't she realise that millions of people in this country are Carers for ill and disabled family members (many of whom would rather go to work) and save the NHS a large fortune by doing so?

Has she said this to you or are you just assuming that is what she would think? Her Grandaughter should be her top priority not what she thinks people would say. ((hugs))

Doobop

Very difficult. Just wanted to suggest not making any quick decisions while you have small 1 poorly. Will be easier to think it through once you're not at a crisis point.

WannabeFree

She is very comfortable in making her thoughts known. Although it wouldn't stop me doing something that was needed if that makes sense.

Something I really need to think about but I know something needs to make things less worrying.

Thank you x

WannabeFree

Morning

Not much sleep again.. yawn. Although all smalls are still sleeping :rotfl: I will wake them soon.

We don't really have any plans today I need to speak to work and a few bits of cleaning I want to get done but nothing much else.

Dinner is Fajitas for smalls and everything is ready to either pop in the slowcooker or just cook this evening. Lunch is salad I think - have some ham and tuna need using up.

Have a good day x