Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally

HairyHandofDartmoor

We had a lovely walk . I had four layers on and my cashmere gloves, but it was a lot warmer than I expected. DH wanted to work and DS1 said it was too cold to go to the coast :doh: so it was just me and stepdad. We walked along a section of the south west coast path and there were beautiful views with the sun shining on the water. We met some very friendly sheep . Stepdad said he enjoyed it.

I've done 11,571 steps, 4.82 miles, 64 floors and 64 active minutes so far today. DH did chicken curry (leftover lentil curry for me). Stepdad left early as very tired.

Today was nicer than yesterday, probably because the wedding was over.

I feel like a cross between Victor Meldrew and Scrooge at the monent . It's a combination of bereavement and lack of money. I know I'm well off compared to people in under developed countries, but you tend to compare yourself with the people around you. And everyone I know can afford to go to weddings, have holidays and pay their bills

I know it's partly our own bad choices, but bereavements and emotional trauma make it hard to concentrate, be proactive and make good decisions. I'm just feeling sorry for myself at the moment.

Sorry I'm constantly moaning on my diary . I know we're lucky to have a roof over our heads, three lovely children and live in a beautiful part of the country.

HairyHandofDartmoor

Nicnak wrote: »

Have you thought about two duvets? One single for him and then double over you both? x

Brilliant idea Nicnak.

Willowtree222

HairyHandofDartmoor wrote: »

We had a lovely walk . I had four layers on and my cashmere gloves, but it was a lot warmer than I expected. DH wanted to work and DS1 said it was too cold to go to the coast :doh: so it was just me and stepdad. We walked along a section of the south west coast path and there were beautiful views with the sun shining on the water. We met some very friendly sheep . Stepdad said he enjoyed it.

I've done 11,571 steps, 4.82 miles, 64 floors and 64 active minutes so far today. DH did chicken curry (leftover lentil curry for me). Stepdad left early as very tired.

Today was nicer than yesterday, probably because the wedding was over.

I feel like a cross between Victor Meldrew and Scrooge at the monent . It's a combination of bereavement and lack of money. I know I'm well off compared to people in under developed countries, but you tend to compare yourself with the people around you. And everyone I know can afford to go to weddings, have holidays and pay their bills

I know it's partly our own bad choices, but bereavements and emotional trauma make it hard to concentrate, be proactive and make good decisions. I'm just feeling sorry for myself at the moment.

Sorry I'm constantly moaning on my diary . I know we're lucky to have a roof over our heads, three lovely children and live in a beautiful part of the country.

life is tough for you at the moment. It's ok to have a 'Scrooge and Victor' moment. Sometimes we need to have those times for us to grow and then move on. You're in the very early stages of grief.

I am glad the walk was nice. It probably did you and your stepdad the world of good to get out for that short time.

amazing steps though! My fit bit died today so didn't chalk up as many as usual. x

HairyHandofDartmoor

Thanks Nicnak.

beanielou

I so hear you on the lack of money.
It is so draining.
To have to think about every single purchase.
Every single penny spent.
I keep reminding myself I am in a better position than the people who use the food bank.
Though in the main they get their rent paid & their council tax.

HairyHandofDartmoor

beanielou wrote: »

I so hear you on the lack of money.
It is so draining.
To have to think about every single purchase.
Every single penny spent.
I keep reminding myself I am in a better position than the people who use the food bank.
Though in the main they get their rent paid & their council tax.

Yes it does add an extra layer of misery to your life .

elizabethhull

HairyHandofDartmoor wrote: »

We had a lovely walk . I had four layers on and my cashmere gloves, but it was a lot warmer than I expected. DH wanted to work and DS1 said it was too cold to go to the coast :doh: so it was just me and stepdad. We walked along a section of the south west coast path and there were beautiful views with the sun shining on the water. We met some very friendly sheep . Stepdad said he enjoyed it.

I've done 11,571 steps, 4.82 miles, 64 floors and 64 active minutes so far today. DH did chicken curry (leftover lentil curry for me). Stepdad left early as very tired.

Today was nicer than yesterday, probably because the wedding was over.

I feel like a cross between Victor Meldrew and Scrooge at the monent . It's a combination of bereavement and lack of money. I know I'm well off compared to people in under developed countries, but you tend to compare yourself with the people around you. And everyone I know can afford to go to weddings, have holidays and pay their bills

I know it's partly our own bad choices, but bereavements and emotional trauma make it hard to concentrate, be proactive and make good decisions. I'm just feeling sorry for myself at the moment.

Sorry I'm constantly moaning on my diary . I know we're lucky to have a roof over our heads, three lovely children and live in a beautiful part of the country.

The walk sounds lovely.

If you can't have a moan on your own diary, when can you ? You need to feel free to express what you're feeling, and your 'moans' sound entirely reasonable. Sometimes you just can't do the 'there are others worse off' thing. You have come so far and yet this year has been pretty !!!!!! (sorry) for you. Come and moan as much as you like - we're all big girls, we understand.

elizabethhull

Nicnak wrote: »

Have you thought about two duvets? One single for him and then double over you both? x

Interesting idea, Nicnak. We've only had a duvet for a year, and it's a king size. It SHOULD be big enough. It all worked beautifully until my night-time pain levels upped a few months ago (about which nothing can be done until I get treatment), and I'm constantly turning over.

I will think on it !

Eager_Elephant

HHOD - I think you should call Npower today, I know you are behind with your payments but if you call and explain the situation they should restart your arrangement and then you don't have to make up the missed payments and that would be one less stress for you.

The letter you got about your payments increasing so much are computer generated, the computer works out your usage and then if you have debt it wants it cleared in 12 months whereas when a human does it they can spread it over 24mths or even longer if you are in financial difficulty.

[Deleted User]

I hope you have a better week, HH, now the wedding is out of the way.


Good idea of Eager_Elephant to phone NPower. Not easy to do but maybe biting the bullet this once will be helpful in the long term. They'll hopefully be understanding. After all, you can't pay money that you don't have. I think there's much more pressure on companies these days to treat people in difficulties fairly.

Good luck:beer:


As for your worry that you moan too much, I second what elizabethhull said earlier. Your moans (and they aren't moans at all IMO) are entirely reasonable and it's your diary so you can say whatever you want on it. We're all here for you, we'll keep reading and posting whatever you might have to say, so please don't worry:kisses3:. As the old BT ad used to tell us, 'it's good to talk'. Talking to us on here is often a lot easier than opening up to people closest to you in real life. It's not healthy to bottle things up.