Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally

[Deleted User]

HMRC100 wrote: »

Aren't any of your boys able to drive? You seem to have to chauffeur them here there and everywhere... including to the shops. Think it's long overdue for them to get their driving tests sorted, assuming they haven't yet passed, and get to stand on their on two feet.
You do a sterling effort in supporting and helping them as all good parents strive to do... but they are adult men.

Being able to drive is, IMO, an essential life skill. DH and I decided we would pay for a full course of driving lessons (as many as it took up to test stage:eek:) for each of our 4 children for their 17th birthdays. This is a rural area with practically no public transport so being able to drive is essential. Athough we knew they probably wouldn't make their careers here we still felt strongly that it was a step in the right direction to helping them with whatever they went on to do wherever that was. The boys were mad keen to learn even though there was absolutely no prospect of DH and I (who were constantly struggling financially) to buy them a car of their own, even a banger and there was no hope of them buying their own as they were at school doing 'A' levels. I (and they) were so pleased we funded the lessons though as DS2 is a paramedic and the fact that he could already drive when he applied was a time-saver in his career progress. He still had to learn to drive a big ambulance at high speeds to emergencies though:eek:. Rather him than me!. DS1 is in the army, and is a Chieftain tank driver. I don't think having an on-road licence fitted him for that though:rotfl:

DD1 learned but has never needed a car, living in London, but she has hired one on occasion for long journeys to family events/holidays. DD2 took a rain check on her lessons. Good thing too as she and DS2 are twins and them both learning at the same time would have been financially crippling:o. The offer still stands though even though she now lives and works about 250 miles away from here and is 27:rotfl:. We always made sure we treated them all the same.

[Deleted User]

HHOD, just meant to add a comment about veggie cookbooks that you mentioned buying. I'm a book addict:o ( a big contributer to my past financial woes:eek:) and I used to buy every cookbook going. Well, not every single one, but all the ones that came out with lots of fanfare :rotfl:. More often than not I was very disappointed because there were invariably only about a handful of recipes that I even wanted to try and even less that became favourites:mad:. Have a look around charity shops, visit your library and have a good thumb through before you buy anything. The internet is a brilliant free resource for recipe ideas as are the lovely people who post all over MSE.


As far DS3's computer problem goes, is there no way he could buy a duplicate one to keep at home so he doesn't have to lug the other everywhere? I know you said it was a big desktop model but he could probably pick one up second hand. It may seem like unnecessary outlay but at the end he could always resell it and it would save so much in time, effort and money getting it to and fro at the end of every term. Add up how much it has cost in petrol and staying over for you and DH so far and it seems like DS3 have been well on the way to recouping any losses. He could then take his essential stuff by coach and be totally independent. Good for all concerned I'd have thought.

milann

Hope you are picking up a bit. Good news on the TA cover.

HairyHandofDartmoor

Finally_Solvent wrote: »

Being able to drive is, IMO, an essential life skill. DH and I decided we would pay for a full course of driving lessons (as many as it took up to test stage:eek:) for each of our 4 children for their 17th birthdays. This is a rural area with practically no public transport so being able to drive is essential. Athough we knew they probably wouldn't make their careers here we still felt strongly that it was a step in the right direction to helping them with whatever they went on to do wherever that was. The boys were mad keen to learn even though there was absolutely no prospect of DH and I (who were constantly struggling financially) to buy them a car of their own, even a banger and there was no hope of them buying their own as they were at school doing 'A' levels. I (and they) were so pleased we funded the lessons though as DS2 is a paramedic and the fact that he could already drive when he applied was a time-saver in his career progress. He still had to learn to drive a big ambulance at high speeds to emergencies though:eek:. Rather him than me!. DS1 is in the army, and is a Chieftain tank driver. I don't think having an on-road licence fitted him for that though:rotfl:

DD1 learned but has never needed a car, living in London, but she has hired one on occasion for long journeys to family events/holidays. DD2 took a rain check on her lessons. Good thing too as she and DS2 are twins and them both learning at the same time would have been financially crippling:o. The offer still stands though even though she now lives and works about 250 miles away from here and is 27:rotfl:. We always made sure we treated them all the same.

DS2 is the only one who can afford driving lessons and he rarely asks to be driven anywhere. When he wants to learn I'm sure he will. DS1 is on benefits and DS3 is a student. They will no doubt learn when they can afford to pay for the lessons which are extremely expensive.

Finally_Solvent wrote: »

HHOD, just meant to add a comment about veggie cookbooks that you mentioned buying. I'm a book addict:o ( a big contributer to my past financial woes:eek:) and I used to buy every cookbook going. Well, not every single one, but all the ones that came out with lots of fanfare :rotfl:. More often than not I was very disappointed because there were invariably only about a handful of recipes that I even wanted to try and even less that became favourites:mad:. Have a look around charity shops, visit your library and have a good thumb through before you buy anything. The internet is a brilliant free resource for recipe ideas as are the lovely people who post all over MSE.


As far DS3's computer problem goes, is there no way he could buy a duplicate one to keep at home so he doesn't have to lug the other everywhere? I know you said it was a big desktop model but he could probably pick one up second hand. It may seem like unnecessary outlay but at the end he could always resell it and it would save so much in time, effort and money getting it to and fro at the end of every term. Add up how much it has cost in petrol and staying over for you and DH so far and it seems like DS3 have been well on the way to recouping any losses. He could then take his essential stuff by coach and be totally independent. Good for all concerned I'd have thought.

Thanks for the suggestion FS but DS3's computer cost about £2,000 and is a specialist piece of kit for his programming course. Not something he could afford to duplicate and not something that would be available second hand.

HairyHandofDartmoor

Onebrokelady wrote: »

Good news about the TA cover Hairy,I hope you are feeling up to doing it by Friday, good idea to take today off,I gave in last week and had the Sunday off because I felt awful and I think that was when I started to turn the corner xx

milann wrote: »

Hope you are picking up a bit. Good news on the TA cover.

Thank you both .

HairyHandofDartmoor

l feel very tired and have a funny taste in my mouth but I'm going to try and at least do my paid job tomorrow. This lergy has certainly lasted a long time.

DH attempted to go to the walk in clinic at the doctor this morning but we have a flat tyre (again) . He's called our breakdown insurance and they're going to come out and change it for the spare. So he can have a second attempt to go to the doctor this afternoon! He feels like he has fluid on his chest and has a swollen knee.

[Deleted User]

Sorry to hear about the tyre and DH's health issues. I hope by now that he's seen the Doctor and has some medication and advice. Sending hugs to you all:kisses3:


I take the point about DS3's computer. What a pity a solution for the to-ing and fro-ing can't be found:(


HHOD, this might not be any use to you but I seem to be on Boots' mailing list and get frequent emails, usually totally irrelevant:rotfl:. Today's was about a Wellness Reboot and although it's probably designed for Boots to sell us stuff;) it looks as if it might show various issues in our health. It doesn't look as if it's personalized to me so if you'd like to have a go, here's the link.

https://www.boots.com/online/wellness/reboot-quiz


I haven't tried it myself yet so have no idea if it would be any use to anyone:o

[Deleted User]

Hi Hairy,

Sorry to hear the DH is still feel poo, hope that the doctors can fix him up quickly....sending big hugs to you both xx

HairyHandofDartmoor

Finally_Solvent wrote: »

Sorry to hear about the tyre and DH's health issues. I hope by now that he's seen the Doctor and has some medication and advice. Sending hugs to you all:kisses3:


I take the point about DS3's computer. What a pity a solution for the to-ing and fro-ing can't be found:(


HHOD, this might not be any use to you but I seem to be on Boots' mailing list and get frequent emails, usually totally irrelevant:rotfl:. Today's was about a Wellness Reboot and although it's probably designed for Boots to sell us stuff;) it looks as if it might show various issues in our health. It doesn't look as if it's personalized to me so if you'd like to have a go, here's the link.

https://www.boots.com/online/wellness/reboot-quiz


I haven't tried it myself yet so have no idea if it would be any use to anyone:o

Interesting B00ts quiz FS. The results say I need to do more strength training and sleep better, but apart from that I have a very healthy lifestyle .

Deleted_User wrote: »

Hi Hairy,

Sorry to hear the DH is still feel poo, hope that the doctors can fix him up quickly....sending big hugs to you both xx

Thanks Purplemum . The car is fixed but DH feels exhausted now so he's going to the walk in clinic tomorrow morning instead.

teafor2

Hi HHD Sorry to hear you and DH are still not fully recovered. Cars, like everything else, are great until something goes wrong with them

Driving is a good skill to have but it doesn't come cheap these days, although it probably never did as it's all relative. But back in our day we could at least afford to buy and run a car after we'd passed our test. Not sure that's the case now for a lot of youngsters. DD and my nephew both passed their tests while at college then went to Uni so of course there's no way they can afford to buy a car and run one on a student loan. I bet DD has to take a couple of refresher lessons if she decides to get one and that will definitely be the case before I let her borrow ours :rotfl:

Excellent news about the TA cover. Fingers crossed you feel up to taking it on. xx