Money Moral Dilemma: Should I agree to pay my mum more rent?

jooleybooley

I have 5 children - and all are now young adults and working. All have various incomes. Two youngest are apprentices, one son is paid better than the others. One is just starting out - and one has a salary in between all the others. All have different incomes. As there are now 7 adults in my house, it woudn't be fair for my husband and I to pay everything when they earn, eat, use electricity with their gadgets, and the amount of toilet rolls and shampoo we get through is ridiculous! Everyone needs to teach their children responsibility and to take control of budget and income and outgoings, and so I asked 20% of take home as family 'keep'. Their first wage is theirs to do with as they want, but after that, they keep 80% to blow on whatever else they want and contribute to the family home with their 20%.
So each pays a different amount - those on the lowest wage - it is only about £27 a week. The next one it works out to £30 a week and so on with just one paying the full £200 a month. The one rule I have, is this is only up to the first £1000 of their earnings. If they earn more than that in a month, then fair play to them and they keep it. They earn it and as their mother I am proud if they earn more and I don't want to take from that. They still need enough for driving lessons, saving for their how home etc.
They are young so havent amased high earnings as they start out - but when all 5 are above the £1000- that will be 'keep' money of £1000 in total to help my husband and I with the living expenses of running a full household. That may seem a lot and a nice income for use in itself - but for 7 of us, our food bill is about £1000 a month - so that will mean that one bill is sorted with their contribution and healthy apetites, and we can cope with the rest because, as parents, we are also happy to keep them safe and warm at home until they move on. And then I will be around there house - eating their biscuits and drinking their tea
I would say to the moral question - speak to your mum and ask on why that amount now when it was lower before, and once she gives you her reason and you see what is paid out every month to run a home, then you may feel it is now the right amount.

dippy3103

When my son starts work I will charge him towards the cost of his keep. But I will put half of the money he pays me into a savings account for him to have when he leaves home. I am not going to tell him this, so it will
hopefully be a help then and a nice suprIsev

mintymoneysaver

My family situation changed a few years ago when I got divorced and bought my ex out of our family home. Since then I have paid all the bills by myself, and can manage it, but from my 'fairly decent' wage there is little left for luxuries such as exotic holidays etc. My student daughters paid nothing if they lived away from home, but when the eldest lived at home for her last year I charged her £50 a month. Now that she has returned home after living abroad for a while and got herself back on her feet financially I am charging £225 a month ( £50 a week) I gave her two months rent free as she had a holiday booked, but now she's set up a standing order. That money will go towards the extra council tax, food, electricity etc, and I'm not ashamed to admit that the £225 that frees up from my salary will be spent on me. I'm looking forward to finally not worrying about whether I can afford a night out, or a new pair of shoes out of the money that I earn. And I know that even with the amount I take she will still be far better off than me, whilst earning a much lower wage.

svain

mintymoneysaver wrote: »

My family situation changed a few years ago when I got divorced and bought my ex out of our family home. Since then I have paid all the bills by myself, and can manage it, but from my 'fairly decent' wage there is little left for luxuries such as exotic holidays etc. My student daughters paid nothing if they lived away from home, but when the eldest lived at home for her last year I charged her £50 a month. Now that she has returned home after living abroad for a while and got herself back on her feet financially I am charging £225 a month ( £50 a week) I gave her two months rent free as she had a holiday booked, but now she's set up a standing order. That money will go towards the extra council tax, food, electricity etc, and I'm not ashamed to admit that the £225 that frees up from my salary will be spent on me. I'm looking forward to finally not worrying about whether I can afford a night out, or a new pair of shoes out of the money that I earn. And I know that even with the amount I take she will still be far better off than me, whilst earning a much lower wage.

To be fair (and not criticising your reasoning at all, as think you are being very fair) ... but even if your daughter income is higher than yours, you already being a homeowner means you are still better off than your daughter

Starrystarrynight1

I know people are saying 'look what you're getting for the money' but I always bear in mind that it's not the same as renting or owning your very own home. That's a big chunk to lose if you're saving up for a house deposit.
I think the hypothetical OP should sit down with her mother, look at a breakdown of how the figure was arrived at, then take it from there. It seems an oddly round figure so I would negotiate if it were me.