Mixed messages from work colleague

Geoff1963

she invites me to go to lunch with her every few days

That means you have a "relationship". Be happy with it.

justme111

DonGotti wrote: »

but I guess I just needed to understand why she didn't figure out her level of attractiveness to me earlier.

In what book does it say one can not kiss someone else without being sure they want to have sex with that someone else and they can not change their mind ?
Ah well I guess you are young (20s) so will hopefully learn.

bagpussbear

I think she has reflected on this, and feels uncomfortable about pursuing a relationship with a work colleague.

You could drive yourself mad over thinking this though. I feel for you, but better it finished quickly before feelings got strong.

PeacefulWaters

she invites me to go to lunch with her every few days

Are you the "make someone else who she's genuinely interested in jealous" bait?

DonGotti

PeacefulWaters wrote: »

Are you the "make someone else who she's genuinely interested in jealous" bait?

No it's definitely not that. I'll just put it down to experience and accept she changed her mind or had to go through whatever happened to decide.

justme111

Don't be surprised if she changes her mind again. The fact that she did not feel like it at some point does not mean she will feel the same in the future. Moreover , I think high chances she will engage in activities of interest with you. Just do not take it all so seriously, it's fun; not fatal attraction.

dekaspace

Perhaps its that she is attracted but put off by you not making the moves at the right time and as such has reached a point where any move is a bad move, be nice to her and she may think you are clingy, be assertive and she thinks you are creepy.


I have had girls outright throw themselves at me (sober) then when I tell them I want to wait they see it as a lack of interest by me (quite the oppostite I just want a girl to be with me even for one night with no regrets)

BrassicWoman

dekaspace wrote: »

Perhaps its that she is attracted but put off by you not making the moves at the right time and as such has reached a point where any move is a bad move, be nice to her and she may think you are clingy, be assertive and she thinks you are creepy.

There is no one magic right time, it's not like wac-a-mole.

Move on, OP.

PeacefulWaters

dekaspace wrote: »

I have had girls outright throw themselves at me (sober) then when I tell them I want to wait they see it as a lack of interest by me (quite the oppostite I just want a girl to be with me even for one night with no regrets)

Serious question, what are you waiting for?

dekaspace

PeacefulWaters wrote: »

Serious question, what are you waiting for?

I have been shy before, other times its been in a situation where whilst people are sober at that point alcohol is available so if regret happened at a later stage fingers can be pointed.


I once had a girl text me and outright hint at sex so asked her if that was what she meant and she said yes, she turned up in a very low cut top and told me her parents didn't expect her home that night but I had to make a move on her, cuddle up on sofa and she told me she had to go 30 minutes later, though in her case she slept around and that was on back of my mind too and of course she left for another hook up.


She was my ideal women in terms of looks and personality (outside of the sleeping around)

BrassicWoman wrote: »

There is no one magic right time, it's not like wac-a-mole.

Thats very strange, people talk about things like friend zone all the time, and I had girls themselves tell me (and others say the same stories male and female about people) that if you don't make a move they move on as assume you are not interested.


And evidently there is as OP mentioned the woman herself admitted she wanted to sleep with him on one occasion.