First wife wants to take control of ex husbands funeral

KxMx

geminilady wrote: »

The children are 30 and 32 grown adults who should not need their mothers support.The first wife should respect her ex husbands wishes and not attend but if she does tell your cousin her husband would understand that there was nothing she could do as legally anyone can attend, she can however refuse to have her at any kind of wake.

Grown adults yes, but the loss of a parent is very traumatic, and needing the support of their remaining parent is quite reasonable.

From OP they want Mum involved in the planning as well as attending the funeral, that is the step too far for me.

Bath_cube

I have been over to see my cousin this weekend and I have discovered a few things. They were not getting on together for some time before his death and he made his family aware of this. He was a heavy drinker and went out every night leaving my cousin alone. He told his former wife he wanted to go back to her and force my cousin from the house so he could sell it and use it to fund a comfortable retirement with the ex. His family are saying this changes things for my cousin and she will have to leave the home and accept this. I have advised her to speak to a solicitor and not citizens advice and also the police as myself and my uncle (my cousins dad) think they are harassing her and are saying she killed her husband.

Yorkshireman99

Bath_cube wrote: »

I have been over to see my cousin this weekend and I have discovered a few things. They were not getting on together for some time before his death and he made his family aware of this. He was a heavy drinker and went out every night leaving my cousin alone. He told his former wife he wanted to go back to her and force my cousin from the house so he could sell it and use it to fund a comfortable retirement with the ex. His family are saying this changes things for my cousin and she will have to leave the home and accept this. I have advised her to speak to a solicitor and not citizens advice and also the police as myself and my uncle (my cousins dad) think they are harassing her and are saying she killed her husband.

If he died intestate then his widow inherits the first £250,000 so they are talking nonsense. Your advice to her is good. give her all the support you can!

Gingernutty

Anything he said before he died means nothing if it wasn't written down.

The first wife lost all rights at the point of the divorce.

The second wife, even if they were talking about divorce, was still married to the dead guy. She is the widow. Her rights come first.

The first wife, even if she is backed up by the rest of the family, is talking complete BS.

Bath_cube

I forgot to say that the written will my cousin found after his death isnt legal. As I said earlier it was one of these DIY ones and she has been told they don't carry much weight as it wasn't witnessed by a solicitor.

comeandgo

Wills don't need to be witnessed by a solicitor.

Yorkshireman99

Bath_cube wrote: »

I forgot to say that the written will my cousin found after his death isnt legal. As I said earlier it was one of these DIY ones and she has been told they don't carry much weight as it wasn't witnessed by a solicitor.

If the will is correctly completed and witnessed then it will be valid. There is no need fore a solicitor to be involved in the signing. Is the will dated after he remarried?

martinbuckley

If the ex wants to be involved, you could always send her the bill for the funeral.

Savvy_Sue

Yorkshireman99 wrote: »

If the will is correctly completed and witnessed then it will be valid. There is no need fore a solicitor to be involved in the signing. Is the will dated after he remarried?

Agree, and it should not cost very much to get a legal opinion on whether the will she has found is valid or not, and not very much more to get a firm warning letter sent to the ex wife if it IS valid.

Bath_cube

I always thought that those DIY wills weren't worth the paper there written on?. My cousin doesn't know who the two people who signed the will are and her husbands ex and the grown up kids are saying it could be a forgery etc.I have been told the f