Money Moral Dilemma: Is it mean to question my share of the bill?

Pollycat

GillM wrote: »

How many more times is this going to be debated? Many threads discussing this at great length, if you do a brief search.

karcher wrote: »

Quite.

It's worth noting the thread was posted on the 19th May and had no replies until today, the 23rd May...

Says a lot about the nonsense that is the MSE Moral Dilemma (or more accurately, an opinion finding mission for filling for the next Weekly email)

Me, a cynic? Never

Yes. How many more times?

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/5440372

Here's a thread ^^^^ titled "large booking at restaurant- how to split the bill?" that's 105 pages long with over 2000 replies.
I'm sure every opinion is covered if the person with the dilemma wants to read it.

peachyprice

More MSE Clickbait

loops298

Are you charging them for your petrol and wear & tear? I have been in your situation and as the driver my friends have always covered the drinks bill between them and I only pay for the food. I am doing them all a favour by driving and they appreciate that.

Bellisima

I don't drink alcohol so am usually the driver. I personally can't bear all that faffing who had what at bill time, so prefer just a straight split with the number of people. Sometimes someone points out that I only drank free tap water so will ask me to pay less, but I'm not bothered by it. By the way soft drinks do NOT cost as much as alcohol! A bottle of mineral water does not cost as much as a restaurant bottle of wine!

peachyprice

Bellisima wrote: »

By the way if you only want to drink water soft drinks do NOT cost as much as alcohol! A bottle of mineral water does not cost as much as a restaurant bottle of wine!

There, corrected that for you.

In many restaurants soft drinks DO cost as much as alcohol,small glass of wine £4.50 bottle of Fentimans £4.00. Bottle of beer £3.50 bottle of San Pelli blood orange £3.50 and so on.

DragonQ

You could always just ask for fuel money to compensate. More diplomatic perhaps, if you don't want to bring it up.

borkid

Bellisima wrote: »

I don't drink alcohol so am usually the driver. I personally can't bear all that faffing who had what at bill time, so prefer just a straight split with the number of people. Sometimes someone points out that I only drank free tap water so will ask me to pay less, but I'm not bothered by it. By the way soft drinks do NOT cost as much as alcohol! A bottle of mineral water does not cost as much as a restaurant bottle of wine!

I did say it depends on what you drink. Some of the fancier bottles of soft drinks are around £2.50 for a small bottle whereas you can get a pint of beer for £3.50 sometimes less.

crmism

You shouldn't feel bad about this at all.

You don't say how often you meet up for a meal but, if it's only once a month, you're still forking out a lot of money for others' drinks, and they're not cheap. You need to explain that, in future, the bill should be split on the basis of who eats/drinks what, so that you pay only for what you consume. Going halves, or sharing the cost equally, isn't fair, and you're being taken advantage of, so get hold of the bill at the end of the meal and add up what you've had and put that money with it. And that ignores the taxi service (fuel, wear and tear) you provide both ways.

If your friends don't like it, then duck out altogether and see how they cope without you.:)

elizabethhull

crmism wrote: »

You shouldn't feel bad about this at all.

If your friends don't like it, then duck out altogether and see how they cope without you.:)

This is an obvious first step. Miss the next outing with a 'sorry going to see Mum/sister', whoever, and see how they manage.

It's all very well for people to state that some branded drinks of which I've never heard are as expensive as wine (which I doubt), but I always drink water ! In any case, one J2O is never as much as 2 or 3 glasses of wine.

I'm often the designated driver, and whenever we get where we're going my pre-dinner drink is paid for. Sometimes I'm offered petrol money which I decline as I was going anyway (what accountants call the 'marginal costs' are minimal). Then whether I choose to pay an individual bill may well depend on the degree of closeness to dining companions. For instance, going out with a club for an occasional social where people are necking beer and wine freely, I pay individually. If it's with close friends, I reckon the pleasure of the occasion far outweighs any nitpicking financial differences.
If I was strapped for money, I would simply only go out on half the occasions, or suggest we meet at someone's house and we all bring a course.

I tend to think that real friends would see the inequity and offer to do something about it.

[Deleted User]

"Guys, I'm not drinking and since I'm giving you all a lift home, can you knock something off my portion of the bill"

Grow some balls people