When things hit rock bottom the only answer is to fight the way back up...

UncannyScot

Hey missus

It's definitely stress, worry related.
As others have suggested, you need to find a way to release all that tension...
Meditation, Yoga, or seeking enlightenment and oneness with the universe whilst driving your fist through a 3" thick plank of wood... may work... ahem...
As you know, I work it out in the gym and find that training hard and sparring with my mates drives it away...
Find whatever works for you.
Hope you find your way to find your inner peace and quieten the noise that a busy mind creates
(((((HUGS)))))
:A

Hiddenidenity

I still feel I don't want to go to bed I have no idea why it's started up again unless it was the emergency dash to A&E. GP was pretty useless and just offered to chuck another tablet to add into the mix. No thanks. It really makes me feel like a child though

Anyway not a NSD because my son is a pain in the rear :mad: He decided skidding up and down the concrete playground on his knees is an awesome game to do at lunch time. Holey trousers and scuffed shoes!! The shoes I've said he has to wear until payday (half term ) Will polish them so he doesn't look to bad. However the trousers!! Where more like shorts! I wasn't impressed. I was half tempted to say he has to use some of his holiday spends for the shoes But I feel a bit too mean :rotfl:

£5 school trousers
£4.78 groceries (Salad/veg/bread) Seems we hit the right time for the reductions and I couldn't leave them

Thank you all for stopping in and your kind words. I think it is the anxiety side of things contributing to the dreams and youngests illness. When I'm awake I can control it the majority of the time, by cleaning/doing something else etc but obviously when I'm asleep I can't.

bagpuss38

Hey hidden, hope little one is much better now.
I wanted to thank you for reminding me about surveys, been doing them everyday and I've just ordered dd a Halloween costume from Amazon with the proceeds. Feeling very chuffed. Thanks again x

missymoo81

I hope you slept ok lovely x

Toni'sfriend

Hope you're feeling better, Hidden. I think it's probably stress related too. A combination of the wee one being ill and the situation with your mother. I can't understand how she came up with this increased amount that you owe her.

Hiddenidenity

Mum is a weird one! I understand some of what she's added on (Day trips and things but some is just ridiculous.) Then she keeps moaning she doesn't want £20 a week.. Then last night rang me to ask if I wanted her to pick the winter coats up for the kids and I can give her the money 'when I can'! No thank you! I will buy the winter coats myself next week!

Speaking of which how expensive have coats gone in the supermarket? DS tried on about 10 last night and his size is £20-£22! The girls weren't much cheaper £20 and £18. Now I think maybe I'm cheap but £60 :eek: Just for coats from the supermarket. They aren't anything special either nor the most expensive! Just the ones that aren't really thin waterproofs.

I think I might give in and do a bit of shopping today, I feel really bored of the same stuff We are really short on milk and have no juice. Or maybe I'll just get over it :rotfl: and stick with the plan. I could make sausage casserole for the smalls today that's one of their favourites and I have reduced veg could do with some carrots though :cool:

Maybe I'll leave the food shop until weekend, I need nappies too then.

I'm struggling to find someone have youngest today and school won't take her why she's still in the red zone of her Action plan (6 inhaler puffs 4 hourly) she's too 'high risk' which is understandable still a pain on the plans though.

HairyHandofDartmoor

I agree that it's probably stress.

I was feeling miserable yesterday morning and I made a list of reasons to be cheerful. It was much longer than I expected and cheered me up.

I think that could help with your anxiety and stress if you gave it a try. It's so easy to focus on the bad stuff.

Hiddenidenity

I think it definitely relates to youngest illness and things that have happened/I've seen happen in the past with/too her.

I see the counsellor later this week and I think I'm going to speak to her about this, we haven't before but I think this is the cause of a lot of anxiety and things. Not all but it's definitely a huge trigger for the out of controlness.

Walking back into A&E brings back those memories from the very first time, the first time and she was so close to being 'gone' and now I feel like well what if it's this time etc. Plus all the procedures and things she has to deal with, meds and side effects. I feel she is only 3, she shouldn't know or have seen and had done 99% of the things she has. Had there not been mistakes made at the start maybe we wouldn't be in the situation we are now?

I know you can't think what if's or why etc and I should be grateful and I really am she is here and it could be much worse but it also could be a lot better.

We can't change what's happened I need to learn to deal with that so in future a 'small' back step and an a&e visit doesn't make me feel like this.

Sorry that turned out really long

Toni'sfriend

I think that's very wise. Why doesn't she want £20.00 a week? Does she want more or does she want it all at once? Apologies for saying so but she seems to want to control your life and isn't giving you any credit at all for what you're managing to do.
Hope you find someone to help you out today.

DrSpendLittle

Hi Hidden, didn’t want to read and run. Your mum’s behaviour sounds just like my MIL. It’s a difficult situation for you, one I imagine in which you’ll never win and she will never change. I think you’ve done exactly the right thing not letting her buy the smalls coats. You could still save the £20per week as planned and then give her a lump sum when you think it appropriate. Potentially £200 on Xmas day...