Is a single mothers benifits enough

weymuffred

dmg24 wrote: »

Chill out Dave/ Fred.

People are 'loosing' everything due to taking out mortgages that they cannot afford, and living lifestyles beyond their means (and I am talking about expensive cars and holidays, not day to day essentials).

So back to my question, should everyone that is better off on benefits give up work?

People take out these mortgages because they need somewhere to live and sometime have no choice but to take out the mortgage, affordable or not, then things can happen which are unexpected.

Zara33

black-saturn wrote: »

I'm glad that you think you have achieved something. If it worked for you thats fine. Personally I wouldnt be able to live with myself if I sent my children to a nursery or childminder when they were young and hardly saw them.

My parents never treated me badly. I always had a roof over my head, clothes on my back and food in my belly and I'm sure they had a sense of achievement. But I would have given up all that at the time to have my parents at home looking after me. Life isnt about material things at all. Hopefully it won't be too late for you to realise.

:eek: :eek: :eek: OMG i can't believe you just said that.

pandas66

dmg24 wrote: »

Good on you pandas, you have found a way to make things work for you and your family.

You clearly work very hard, I wonder if others are afraid of hard work? x

lol, thanks but I dont always work hard


not liking the way this thread is now turning tho, same old bleedin' hearts tho and as so many know my views I shall bow out [STRIKE]dis[/STRIKE]gracefully before I question certain posters about hypocracy.

PasturesNew

The world loves a hypocrite
Gives new angles to the discussion chugging along when it should have died aaages ago

dmg24

pandas66 wrote: »

lol, thanks but I dont always work hard


not liking the way this thread is now turning tho, same old bleedin' hearts tho and as so many know my views I shall bow out [strike]dis[/strike]gracefully before I question certain posters about hypocracy.

I know exactly what you mean x

weymuffred

dmg24 wrote: »

So move areas! I know several families who have left London and come to live in Nottingham, and now have a considerably better standard of living. It may seem an impractical option in the short term, but when you consider the longer term, it does make sense.

:rotfl: What just like that? I am more responsible. And what pray tell and I going to pay the removal costs, etc etc etc.

viktory

black-saturn wrote: »

I'm glad that you think you have achieved something. If it worked for you thats fine. Personally I wouldnt be able to live with myself if I sent my children to a nursery or childminder when they were young and hardly saw them.
My parents never treated me badly. I always had a roof over my head, clothes on my back and food in my belly and I'm sure they had a sense of achievement. But I would have given up all that at the time to have my parents at home looking after me. Life isnt about material things at all. Hopefully it won't be too late for you to realise.

I never left my children with a childminder or in a nursery - I used to lock them in the cupboard under the stairs

Sadly, I think it is too late for me to see the error my my ways re child rearing. My daughter is a 20 year old special constable who also has a full time managerial position in retail and my son is a parts apprentice at Honda.

Damn, where did I go wrong?

black-saturn

Good for them. I personally would be very upset with my children if they put career before their family life. I'm trying to teach them that to love your family and be there to nurture them is a good thing.

Sarahsaver

Going back to the original question, yes the benefits for a single parent were enough in my experience. I spent £20 a week on food for me and 3 kids and we ate really well.
I think I can safely say I did my bit for society by being a teacher for nearly 8 years (stopped in 2001, still see kids I tought in 1995 and they remember me) then having a stroke I needed DLA for a while, and incapacity benefit. Then doing the right thing by my kids I got the violent drugged up ex to move out and became a single parent.
I was financially better off as a single parent than I am now as a happily re-married woman with a wage earning husband. It DOES happen! And I think bringing up children responsibly is a job which is undervalued. I studied psychology part time to help my son who has behavioural/emotional problems, I used childcare intermittently. It just costs too much. WHY indeed work every day just for an extra £10 or £20? Better for my kids to be looked after someone who LOVES them (me) at no financial cost to myself than someone on the minimum wage who has a lot less life experience.
Bringing up a family IS work.
Now I have all but stopped 'working' (paid work), there is no childcare available round here, DS needs a specialist really anyway, and I am more qualified than anyone in that area!
I refuse to be called a burden because I will not get a fulltime 'job'.

dmg24

weymuffred wrote: »

:rotfl: What just like that? I am more responsible. And what pray tell and I going to pay the removal costs, etc etc etc.

I'm sure you'll find some benefit that will cover the costs. You find it for everything else.

The thing is Fred/ Bob/ Dave, you need to learn to help yourself. If you find a job in another town, you find a way to make it happen. You move up there for a few months on your own. For that few months, you get a room in a shared house, so minimal outgoings. Then, when you can afford it, the rest of your family can move with you.

Clearly some people just have more ambition than you.

I am more responsible.

Says the man who lets his IS claim lapse due to missing three medicals.