Sexual harassment in the workplace

breakinthesun

Tiddlywinks wrote: »

Mis-understanding and mis-representing other posters by implying they were saying 'she asked for it'?
[...]
In discussing her sex life openly in the office she sexualised herself to her colleagues... still not acceptable to receive the uninvited attention BUT not quite the innocent herself is she?

You know, there will eventually come a point where it will click with you and you'll be all "Oh, that's why all those people called me out on that stuff. Turns out I *am* the problem".

For now though, this is your regularly scheduled irony alert.

...alert.

Tiddlywinks

breakinthesun wrote: »

You know, there will eventually come a point where it will click with you and you'll be all "Oh, that's why all those people calmed me out on that stuff. Turns out I *am* the problem". For now though, this is your regularly scheduled irony alert.

...alert.

If you're trying to have a dig then at least spell it out rather than trying (and failing) to use analogies.

I wasn't suggesting that posters say she was asking for it (just drawing attention to the fact that others have made such mis-representations) - nor was I saying she asked for it.

I'm purely saying that she also behaved inappropriately too.

breakinthesun

The explanation you're looking for is that it's a false equivalence. The more obvious, we-can-all-agree-is-wrong, example of this kind of thing is : "Yes, she was raped, but she was wearing a short skirt...". The sexism is in drawing of an equivalence between the two as if one explains the other.

What posters here have done is : "Yes, someone touched her !!!, but she was openly talking about sex...". The sexism is in the false equivalence. If your view is "Well, they're both as bad as each other and could have both been dismissed", then you are, as I said, part of the problem.

breakinthesun

Tiddlywinks wrote: »

I wasn't suggesting that posters say she was asking for it (just drawing attention to the fact that others have made such mis-representations) - nor was I saying she asked for it.

I'm purely saying that she also behaved inappropriately too.

Also,
...alert.

Tiddlywinks

breakinthesun wrote: »

The explanation you're looking for is that it's a false equivalence. The more obvious, we-can-all-agree-is-wrong, example of this kind of thing is : "Yes, she was raped, but she was wearing a short skirt...". The sexism is in drawing of an equivalence between the two as if one explains the other.

What posters here have done is : "Yes, someone touched her !!!, but she was openly talking about sex...". The sexism is in the false equivalence. If your view is "Well, they're both as bad as each other and could have both been dismissed", then you are, as I said, part of the problem.

No - my view is that openly talking about your sex life to work colleagues just draws attention to your sexuality - and may be misinterpreted as a result. Just like walking through the office shouting 'cake, cake' - expect someone to turn up with a plate and fork and expect a treat.

It's all about perception - this was a slap on the bum.... not a full blown violent assault and so we need to get things back into perspective.

Like it or not our actions have consequences and presenting yourself as someone who likes to talk about sex with colleagues is inviting people to view you differently to someone who is shy and retiring. It's just human nature.

And to be clear - no, unwarranted physical contact is not acceptable.

nicechap

Tiddlywinks - don't rise to the bait, if you look at their posting history, you'll see they have an agenda to disrupt and wind up.

Guest101

There's a massive difference between 'she was asking for it' and 'she didn't take reasonable care of her comments' - which it seems some people were actually saying

gettingtheresometime

must admit I never knew the term 'girls' was offensive.


I often refer to the women I worked with as girls when talking about them to a 3rd party.


And I'm a woman/girl/female of the species

stuart30

Seems a slap on the bum is over looked..what if done a "Crocodile dundee" and grab a handful of the front Bum.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2holvsTiY6E


Im sure that would be considered much more serious...why though,laying hands on someone (in an inappropriate area) who has not asked you to,should be a sackable offence.

Think the father has every right to see the bum slapper and ask for an apology in front of the staff who have been effected by his actions.

Guest101

stuart30 wrote: »

Seems a slap on the bum is over looked..what if done a "Crocodile dundee" and grab a handful of the front Bum.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2holvsTiY6E


Im sure that would be considered much more serious...why though,laying hands on someone (in an inappropriate area) who has not asked you to - not that it matters much, but I doubt she presented a list of areas she was and wasn't comfortable being touched. ,should be a sackable offence.

Think the father has every right to see the bum slapper and ask for an apology in front of the staff who have been effected by his actions.

The father? On what basis? What about the uncle? Cousin? Neighbour's daughter's god-daughters 2nd aunt?


The only person entitled to an apology is the woman in question (or any other victims)