feel so stupid

Mupette

sam_m wrote: »

The problem is no one can help, im on here because it is a job forum so a good place to ask what i do next. Like i said i have no idea what to do next because no one actually wants to take me on even as a part time job, even my stepsister has a part time job at a shoe shop and did such a good job they want her to work for them again during the summer before her next year at Uni.

I mean why can't i be like that

Quite the opposite.

You have turned down everything people have suggested,

The reason you don't have a girlfriend is your attitude, get that chip off your shoulder.

What you need is mindfulness, you need to learn to like yourself, before expecting others to like you.

You also need to give yourself a good kick up the backside and start being positive, But if you want to continue to be negative then you'll never get anywhere in life, actually you're already finding that out. Change your attitude, do some volunteer work

sam_m

I do loads of volunteering mate, the problem is it doesn't give me money, i do more things at the volunteering that some people get paid for. What do you mean my attitude its not my fault that women don't want to look at me in public or smile at me when i smile at them or message me on plenty of fish when i message them

DCFC79

You looked at Indeed lately ?

Kitchen Assistant at the Jack Mytton Inn.
KFC are still looking.

pinkduvetdiva

I already see a GP and get some counselling but it still doesn't really help, they can't magic me up a girlfriend, money or a car.

No, but they will help you to see things from a different perspective and work on techniques that can help you in challenging situations.

I was rude to KFC because they didn't even let me take a holiday, i mean honestly they should be happy i even applied for them which would really have been cleaning up peoples !!!! off the table. I would have been the best one there and wouldn't have stayed long but they should be happy that i wanted to work for them.

KFC is an employer. They pay their staff to be in the shop working for them. You had a pre booked holiday, but someone decided that in your case that was going to be an issue.
This is where the techniques I mentioned above would come in handy.
So instead of kicking off and burning your bridges, maybe you could have said, "That's a shame, but could you please keep my details on file in case anything else comes up?".
Remember, they originally offered you the job, so you must have come across well at the interview. I know it didn't work out, but surely that must be at least a small positive?

GarthThomas

sam_m wrote: »

Im not getting angry, its just the advice is not working, how can i take the advice if it isn't working, and why would you want me banned for getting upset about how my life is turning out, its not my fault no one wants to emply me

You told me to go and kill myself, so the above is a lie.

Sorry, Sam, but you are abusive, offensive and insulting. Of course you can't get a job, why would anyone want to work with you?

You won't be able to fix everything in one go, so why not work on the honesty first? While you lie so easily yo don't spdeserve a job.

jjj1980

sam_m wrote: »

i cant think of any posotive things

1. Havent got a job or much money-negative Been there but it only takes one interview to go the right way for this to change. Get registered on every job search website there is and all your local employment agencies.
2. never had a gf before-negative Turn it into a positive then, when you do find someone you will have bypassed all the silly teenage-style messing around and it will be a proper, adult relationship
3. cant drive-negative Once you have the job sorted, start putting money aside to take lessons if you want to.
4. cant cook-negative This is easy to fix as everyone else has said. Internet or books will give loads of simple ideas to try. Everybody gets a recipe wrong from time to time, you just shrug and try something else.
5. dont go to uni-negative I've never been, have nothing other than my GCSEs but hard work can often mean more than a result on a piece of paper.
6. dont have many qualifications-negative See above

I'm not normally harsh with my words but after reading the whole thread, I felt compelled to respond.


All the above are things you can work on and improve, IF YOU WANT TO. No-one else can do it for you and honestly, there is no more advice out there than you have already been given.


First and foremost though, you need to visit your GP and ask for a referral to either counselling or a support group specialised in treating people with Autism. You need more help to change your mind-set that a chat forum can give.


You need to stop with the thoughts that any employer should be glad or grateful that you have applied for their vacancy. I have interviewed people with the same mind-set and they have been an instant reject. The employer no doubt has a high number of applicants for their vacancy - for example, a vacancy on my team was advertised, pretty menial work on just over National Living Wage and we had over 400 applicants! I was very annoyed when the person I interviewed came across as wanting me to be grateful he deigned us as good enough for him to consider working for. I really felt I had wasted a valuable interview slot that could have been used for a more suitable candidate.


Once you have spoken to the GP, as above, get registered on every job search website you can find and all you local employment agencies. Also, see if anywhere new can give you a review of your CV. Any advice you can get in this regards is worthwhile. Look out for any job fairs happening that you can get to.


Try the Remploy website as there seems to be online support available.


There also seem to be tons of help and advice on the Autism.org website http://www.autism.org.uk/about/adult-life/work.aspx

DCFC79

Your at college right, what is it you want to exactly do after college eg job wise ?

Maybe you should be looking for a job in that area.

sam_m

DCFC79 wrote: »

You looked at Indeed lately ?

Kitchen Assistant at the Jack Mytton Inn.
KFC are still looking.

I would never want to try KFC again in my life, and i tried the kitchen assistant

sam_m

GarthThomas wrote: »

You told me to go and kill myself, so the above is a lie.

Sorry, Sam, but you are abusive, offensive and insulting. Of course you can't get a job, why would anyone want to work with you?

You won't be able to fix everything in one go, so why not work on the honesty first? While you lie so easily yo don't spdeserve a job.

Yes and i said sorry for saying that. Im not lying, the only reason why i can't get a job is because the people that i apply for won't actually give me a chance

sam_m

DCFC79 wrote: »

Your at college right, what is it you want to exactly do after college eg job wise ?

Maybe you should be looking for a job in that area.

I want to work in travel and tourism work in a shop, gift shop, being a tour guide, travel agent something where i can talk with the public because i quite like that