Is this a lousy comment or am I overthinking it?

Doody · 9 March 2017 at 10:14AM

It sounds like your issue with this woman is far deeper than this remark about the flowers. If you are thrown together so much by circumstances then perhaps it is time to try and find ways of distancing yourself.

For example, these trips away. You said your partner's friend likes to take his partner. How would it be if you didn't go? Had some other even that happened at the same time? It isn't a holiday for you and the more you get involved with this woman the more she will consider you her greatest friend.

There might be other ways of distancing yourself. When they come round, do you have to be there? Does your own partner know how you feel? Talk the situation over with him. It's really not fair to be spending time with some one you don't really like, worse for them to consider you their best friend.

I've got into a similar situation with the mother of a friend of one of my children. When children are young, the mothers are thrown together. I am kind of an open, chatty person and this other mother thought that because of that we were great friends. From my point of view, we weren't. It became quite difficult later.

catkins · 10 March 2017 at 5:14PM

I think it was very rude and I would have been both upset and annoyed.

I love getting flowers and appreciate any gift I am given. Personally I would not be buying her a present next year

Primrose · 11 March 2017 at 2:29PM

Next year just send her a card, and say "I was going to send you flowers but after last year I remembered you complaining we all gave you too many so decided not to repeat the same mistake this year".