Is this a lousy comment or am I overthinking it?

dirty_magic

I wouldn't say that to anyone even if the flowers had been bought by someone else. I was brought up to be grateful for gifts even if I don't like them, so when I hear people complaining about gifts it comes across as rude.

justme111

Often dealing with people we would not have chosen to deal with otherwise prompts us to become better people. I do not see anything horrible neither in her flower remark nor in feedback to the restaurant. Is she not British by any chance?

chesky

...actually calls me her best friend ...

How very sad to think that your best friend is someone who actually dislikes you. Poor woman.

warby68

I remember getting inundated with flowers for a landmark birthday

As a lifelong lover of flowers as a gift and hardly ever getting them, I was a bit shocked at myself for feeling slightly ungrateful. All of a sudden my favourite thing turned into something where people couldn't actually think of a gift so turned to woman=flowers. I never dreamed of mentioning it and am still slightly ashamed of myself but can't deny the thought was there. Never had to worry again though lol - flowers soon went back to being a rare treat lol

justme111

When people feel uneasy about something they often do silly remarks when put on a spot in conversation

justme111

pearl123 wrote: »

Perhaps she just feels uncomfortable about receiving flowers from you. You say you don't like her much, perhaps the feeling is mutual. People do pick up vibes.

Judging by what op says she would have liked to be liked by op but despite op's politeness feels something is not quite right - people indeed pick up on vibes , they just often misinterpret them. If she lacks social graces she is bound to have hard time and frustrations in dealing with all those that sent her flowers - I would have felt awkward at getting them from people who dislike me.

seashore22

PasturesNew wrote: »

Some people aren't any good at being "put on the spot" with conversation over a phone. I could easily say the same thing myself - I bet that's how I "upset" a lot of people without even realising.

You're overthinking it.

This is something I can imagine doing too. I'm not deliberately mean or nasty, but I've lost count of the number of times I've put my foot in it over the years. I still cringe about some of my more momentous gaffs.

And no I don't have aspergers.

Pop_Up_Pirate

tensandunits wrote: »

Surely you just need to learn to think before you speak. I used to be tactless, and a bit outspoken too as a child, but as I grew up I learned to be more mindful what I was saying.

Anyone with a chronic illness such as Fibromyalgia or anyone on the AS can't always think before they speak.

OP...Don't take this sort of thing to heart. She probably feels much worse than you do.

Out,_Vile_Jelly

My mum is terrible with remembering what presents she's bought for other people (often gives the same thing two years running) and what others have bought her (regifts things with a lack of tact). Some people are just vague about posessions; it's certainly not meant to be deliberately rude.

Brits don't traditionally complain about poor service; she obviously has a more American attitude.

Life and work circumstances often mean we have to spend time with people we have nothing in common with unfortunately.

Fireflyaway

Maybe she was trying to be sarcastically funny? Or maybe she is just a bit rude and ungrateful?!
Don't let it bother you. Some people don't have much tact and don't censor what they say. Its not like she is a family member or work colleague you have to spend every day with.
You made a really kind gesture but unfortunately some people are just ungrateful.