Not saying thank you for presents!

bestpud

hellies wrote: »

This infuriates me! when we were kids we either had to phone relatives or write to them to say thanks, being a bit shy we always opted for the latter. I would never not say thank you for a gift, and take great effort in writing thank yous from dd as she is only 2 (have done this since we received gifts when she was born!) as I would hate for people to think we just open her pressies and then thats it. I actually enjoy doing it, oh's family think I am abit mad but they do say they keep them all, I just explain that I don't like the thought of people thinking we are not grateful for gifts.

Is it just the lack of a written thank you which infuriates you though? As in you find a verbal thank you alone unacceptable?

I'm thinking we are all giving opinions here but there are so many different ways to give a gift and types of relationships....

Kethry - glad you've managed to move on. Thanks for sharing your experience as it shows we should be careful about jumping to conclusions!!!

MrsTinks

I have to say I've never done written thank you's apart from after my confirmation many many moons ago... I settle for thankyou face to face or on the phone... then again I am also one of the people who never send christmas cards... I write them, but forget to send them... hand all the "by hand ones" out no problems tho

buxtonrabbitgreen

I was taught always to write thankyou letters. I still do. I expect my children to as well. Though as my son hates writing I allow him to email his thanks to the members of the family with computers. Personally I think it is rude not to send a thankyou note when someone has taken the time and trouble , and thier money to buy you something. I agree with the op , if people can't be bothered to thank me I stop buying for them. In the case of kids I wait till they get to 16. If they haven't learnt any manners by then it is tough for them.

PasturesNew

I've never written a thank you note... but then when I think about it, I've never written more than 6 letters in my life. All over 30 years ago.

It wouldn't bother me if I got people pressies and they didn't say thank you. I'd not even think about it/realise.

Just stop sending the presents if it bothers you.

Nutty_Tart

We always had to write thank-you letters to grandparents as we didn't see them that often. I always say thank-you on receipt of a gift and again as we/they are leaving and have also instilled this into my kids. They even say thank-you to their dads girlfriend for having them over (we have been split for some time). Although, I was annoyed when we went out of our way to buy a gift (all beit a small one) and birthday card for a friends son, and didn't get a thank-you. Nor did they even bother to get a card for my DS birthday a week later. I just thought it was so rude, so they have been crossed off the present list!

hellies

bestpud wrote: »

Is it just the lack of a written thank you which infuriates you though? As in you find a verbal thank you alone unacceptable?

No, its just when people dont bother to thank the giver of the gift, its so rude to receive a gift and not say thank you either face to face, on the phone or by letter!

*Bright-Idea*

When my 2 children open Birthday/Christmas pressies from the family they are usually in the same room so, thank you and a hug, is sufficient I think. For the family members who can't be there or send money in a card then it's a phone call or a thank you note depending on how much contact we have with that family member or friend.
When it comes to the kids parties tho' they never open the pressies at the party it's always after (for fear of them saying I've already got one or that blank look they get when not impressed.....) I take a photo of each child at the party with my child, I print these off and use the picture as the thank you note so the friend gets a reminder of the party and a thank you all in one!

AmyGroovy3

well, i have to say i'm in my late teens and have always said thankyou ,
my rules,
Verbal thankyous to parents, granparents, people who give present directly
Written thankyous - even just a card, to eveyone else! even friends

wolvesinwales

This is a pet hate of mine.
My nieces never thanked me for Xmas gifts so last year i just bought them token 99p presents and guess what i got a thankyou by e mail ! Leaving me feeling a little guilty.
Worst of all though is my step father, even when handed gifts he doesn't say thanks and puts them straight away onto a shelf or into a cupboard. I bought him a newly released DVD for his birthday in March and he put it straight onto a pile of other DVDs hardly looking at it.
I was down there last week and saw that it was still sealed in cellophane on the pile . If it's still unopened next time i'm there i will have it back and stick it on E Bay. Or i could give it him for Xmas

*Bright-Idea*

wolvesinwales wrote: »

Worst of all though is my step father, even when handed gifts he doesn't say thanks and puts them straight away onto a shelf or into a cupboard. I bought him a newly released DVD for his birthday in March and he put it straight onto a pile of other DVDs hardly looking at it.
I was down there last week and saw that it was still sealed in cellophane on the pile . If it's still unopened next time i'm there i will have it back and stick it on E Bay. Or i could give it him for Xmas

That's just plain ignorant, next time I wouldn't bother getting him anything. ungrateful so and so!:mad: