Get a grip woman!

Suffolk_lass

Futile list number 397:

1. [STRIKE]Got to write the post-box Christmas Cards[/STRIKE] done and posted
2. [STRIKE]Prepare one-pot for next Friday (at least buy the ingredients)[/STRIKE] bought beef skirt
3. [STRIKE]Look for the small amount of Christmas chocolates and maybe buy[/STRIKE] bought from Morries
4. Put up tree and decorate - next Friday...
5. Re-do outside lights (at least the faulty ones were identified before Xmas!) also next Friday as Son was too late arriving
6. [STRIKE]Run the bar at lunch time[/STRIKE] DH did this while I finished the cards
   [*[STRIKE]]Cook roast pork and all the bits[/STRIKE] Yep. Delicious!
7. [STRIKE]Make a pannetone trifle (I know, not on our diet...) [/STRIKE]and half eaten. Yum!
8. Empty the recently rat-inhabited roof space and decontaminate the contents (might slip to next week) yep. slipped
9. [STRIKE]Spend some time with DS[/STRIKE] yes done - he confessed to something and was very contrite. We will have to bail him out financially
10. Wrap SS parcel tomorrow
11. Start next week's shopping list - and check MySM not done
12. [STRIKE]Attend Carol Service (take lesson reading)[/STRIKE] done. Was lovely
13. [STRIKE]Change our bedding and wash it[/STRIKE] done and bed made
14. And breathe bit wheezy after that lot!

Karmacat

Very, very well done :A:A:A

Suffolk_lass

Oh dear. DS has got himself in a bit of a financial mess and finally confessed (we knew there was something stressing him but he was too ashamed to tell us). You could literally see the weight coming off his shoulders as we agreed to support him and bail him out to meet his short term commitments.

We don't yet know the scale of the issue but initially his car insurance of just under £600 which is sitting on my December Credit Card statement (will be paid in full on 10th Jan) cannot be reimbursed. As my own car insurance hits the same month, this is an unwelcome Christmas Present. Worse to come is that he was too fearful to confess earlier and he has a ski-ing holiday to pay for next month that he has not got enough money to pay.

I did this in my first few years at work and my Dad bailed me out. It would have been my Dad's birthday tomorrow, had he not died early. It is my pleasure to help DS but I must make him pay me back in full so that he learns his own debt lesson (as my Dad did with me). Initially I have suggested he get some part-time pub work if possible for 2 nights a week - one to give him some spending money and one to add to his pot of reserves. He can pay me back over the next year, hopefully.

He used to keep the debit card for the second account at our house, but this year he wanted to keep it and at 25, of course that was his choice. So he kept the debit card for his reserves EF account and has been dipping into it over the last year so that now there is not enough left to meet his commitments. He has long-standing SO set up from his current account - £100 for car, £100 for hols and I scrape away the TTs at the end of the month but as he has been regularly drawing cash it has nearly all gone!

You cannot teach wisdom, you can only learn it....

Busy_Mee1

Oh dear Suffolk Lass. We have done something similar with our DS this year...he made the classic error of forgetting the VAT on some work he had done on his house, so his bill was much more than expected. He was very stressed and the bank of Mum and Dad came to the rescue. We always make a point of making our DC repay any money owed by standing order as they do need to learn.

I have also been reminding ours that once we are retired, things will be different as our income will be much reduced. We might even need the bank of Son and Daughter :rotfl:

Busy_Mee1

PS My daughter loves her 1 night a week pub job, which she started when at university. Even though she has a proper job now she has kept it because she likes the social aspects and the extra cash.

enthusiasticsaver

Oh dear. Hopefully he has learnt his lesson. I agree with making him pay it back at least to start with. If no consequences how will he learn. I know I would do the same with either of my girls though. Not what you want round Xmas though.

Karmacat

Ouch! Sounds like you've sorted it really well. It was literally weighing on him too

And a job in a bar can be a really good thing - there was a dfw-er last year, I can't remember his name he had a really nice flat in Brighton, and wanted to live the high life as well as pay his mortgage off early, and one thing he did was get a job in a bar, exactly that. He found it fitted really well with his social life too :rotfl: it sort of became a cheap night out, even though it was so tiring :rotfl:

Suffolk_lass

Thanks to all of you - I think the point about the extra job being part of his social life is well made. We did say, get yourself to your favourite pubs and make sure you are a regular in one or two, so you know you fit in, and so do they.

It looks as though the shortfall is about a thousand, maybe £1200 so not completely disastrous! He has got a cash present from Grandma coming and we were going to contribute to his hols anyway so he will get there but I need him to learn now. As you say Busy Mee1, he needs to learn this lesson now with our impending retirement.

beanielou

The joys of our DS's!

apple_muncher

Karmacat wrote: »

Ouch! Sounds like you've sorted it really well. It was literally weighing on him too

And a job in a bar can be a really good thing - there was a dfw-er last year, I can't remember his name he had a really nice flat in Brighton, and wanted to live the high life as well as pay his mortgage off early, and one thing he did was get a job in a bar, exactly that. He found it fitted really well with his social life too :rotfl: it sort of became a cheap night out, even though it was so tiring :rotfl:

Was it manvmortgage?