14 years I feel Ive wasted,not sure how to cope

my-user-name

Without doubt this video is going to the top of my Facebook page Edward,I haven't laughed so much in ages lol
(Sent you a message but not sure if you received it or its still floating around the universe)
You crack me up lol

Primrose

I hope things are starting to feel better for you now and you're gradually feeling you've turned a corner. I should think that by now your Ex is starting to feel the financial pinch with all his new expenses kicking in! Just look around your newly decorated room and enjoy the results of your efforts.

my-user-name

Primrose wrote: »

I hope things are starting to feel better for you now and you're gradually feeling you've turned a corner. I should think that by now your Ex is starting to feel the financial pinch with all his new expenses kicking in! Just look around your newly decorated room and enjoy the results of your efforts.

Hi Primrose,
I'm still stripping,painting and decorating...........I'm on to the bathroom now lol
I mentioned the money he put into my bank account(one grand less that he agreed on but hey ho),well the other day I received a letter from him,through my door,no stamp on it.
It was a weird one:( stupid things to begin with like "I have just the best nights sleep ive had in months because I now know you can no longer get under my skin"then he said " I now realise I am completely over you and if you want to be cold then I can be colder"
He finished off by saying "there will be no more money today or any other day.I ma going to concentrate on my family,my home,my life"His final words were "so leave me in peace to get on with it.Goodbye"
Havent got a bloody clue what he was on about??? I could of contacted him but I didn't.
However a neighbour who I know seen him coming away from my flat and spoke to him.He said to him"neither of you look happy since you split up" and he replied "well it was her choice" erm no it bloody wasn't
Men I,ll never understand them

Primrose

Sounds as if he might possibly have been drinking or at best is under some serious disillusions. In either case you're better off moving forward on your own. It has obviously got under his skin that you never contacted him to query the missing £1,000 from the payment he made and I see the letter as a spiteful response to try and even out the temperature. Your not responding to that either has probably ruffled his feathers even more because he now knows, despite his disillusions, that he has no way of permeating your armour.

Mojisola

my-user-name wrote: »

the other day I received a letter from him,through my door,no stamp on it.

It was a weird one:( stupid things to begin with like "I have just the best nights sleep ive had in months because I now know you can no longer get under my skin"then he said "I now realise I am completely over you and if you want to be cold then I can be colder"

He finished off by saying "there will be no more money today or any other day.I ma going to concentrate on my family,my home,my life"

His final words were "so leave me in peace to get on with it.Goodbye"

Havent got a bloody clue what he was on about???

I think he's feeling the complete opposite of everything he said in the letter.

You were 'leaving him in peace'; you haven't asked him for any more money; he is so not 'over you'!

Sending you less money than agreed was obviously meant to get you contacting him again. You called his bluff and didn't.

He's struggling to come to terms that he has got himself in this situation and can't understand why you aren't chasing him and pleading for him to come back.

Pollycat

Mojisola wrote: »

I think he's feeling the complete opposite of everything he said in the letter.

You were 'leaving him in peace'; you haven't asked him for any more money; he is so not 'over you'!

Sending you less money than agreed was obviously meant to get you contacting him again. You called his bluff and didn't.

He's struggling to come to terms that he has got himself in this situation and can't understand why you aren't chasing him and pleading for him to come back.

My thoughts exactly ^^^^.

Pollycat wrote: »

I think that's the best thing to do.

I too think he's done it on purpose with some ulterior motive in mind.
And is waiting for you to bite.
So - don't.

You've double-sixed him by acting totally opposite to the way he expected.
The joke is most definitely on him. :T

Primrose

He could have posted the letter. I can,t help wondering if he hand delivered it half hoping that he might have bumped into you and been able to heldge his bets on how he would play things if that happened. He's obviously not anxious for your neighbours to know the truth that it was he who actually quit of his own volition.

VintageHistorian

Aaah, I was right on the money, he really doesn't like that you're living fine without him.

Don't get in contact again, but I'd keep the letter just in case you start getting more of them, it'll be useful if you ever need to get a friendly PCSO to have a chat with him about harassment.

Primrose

He's either going to run out of steam now or the pent up frustration of you not acting in the way he had anticipated could cause him to flip and really start acting out of character. I suspect he's very frustrated that you seem to be getting on with your life whilst perhaps the financial pressures are now starting to creep up on him, with the realisation that the grass was not necessarily greener on the other side and he may finally have burnt his boats.


If he was "completely over you" he wouldn't even be wasting his time writing a letter to you and coming over to your place to hand deliver it.

my-user-name

HI everyone,many thanks for the recent posts regarding him and his latest antics.
All of you are right,if the shoe was on the other foot and I thought the grass was greener the other side only to find out its actually not and then see the one Ive got rid of actually getting on with their life I'm certain it will pee me off good style.But he only has himself to blame at the end of the day,silly man.
I'm still going through different feelings,some days I hate him for basically stringing me along for so long,some day I'm angry with myself for actually allowing it,then theres the times when a certain songs comes on which brings back a memory and the odd one or two tears arrive.
But apart from that I am getting on with life and I still love that feeling when I come home from work and see my lovely living room and hallway.....soon to add my bathroom to the list of rooms,yay!!!
I still don't understand the words in his letter to me and as posters have mentioned the fact he could of posted it instead of hand delivered,however according to the neighbour who spoke to him they said he delievered it through the door at a time when he would of known I was in work,very weird??
One good thing is I'm off work for 11 days at the beginning of May and I'm determined the bathroom will be done...........and then I start on the kitchen lol By the time I get to my bedroom I,ll be well and truly shattered lol