Inheritance

onlyroz

On a practical note you can find out from the land registry (or even from rightmove) what the house sold for. However, you still might not see a penny of "your" inheritance if your mother ever needs to go into residential care. I'd suggest that you get on with living your own life and making the most of your own opportunities rather than waste away wishing for something you might never get.

rach_k

If you were my grown-up child and I knew you felt like that, I'd re-write my will to leave you a plant and give the rest of my estate to the cat rescue.

Have you considered that perhaps your grandparents didn't want to leave you anything? Would you still feel entitled to something then? Why?

bmthmark

This has got to be a joke

Tuesday_Tenor

bmthmark wrote: »

This has got to be a joke

No , I don't think so.

I suspect the OP's feeling of being 'hard done by' could come from knowing some people who HAVE had major gifts from parents when grandparents died.

I didn't inherit anything from anyone until I was in my 50s. Before that, everything I owned had been hard-won through my own sheer hard work for over 30 years. While I never felt a sense of entitlement to any family money, I DID feel a resentment towards friends who were suddenly enabled to buy houses, cars and holidays as the result of 'grandma's money from Dad'. The total randomness of it seemed unfair. To the extent that I felt no one should be able to inherit at all - everyone should have to work hard for their things as I had had to!!

So, in that sense I sort of understand where the OP might be coming from.

But, OP, life isn't fair. We all have different resources, talents, problems, support and challenges. Don't compare your situation with others or it will lead to resentment. Accept that you have no entitlement to your Mum's money. Count what blessings you do have. Be proud of you achievements - looks like you're nearly debt-free, through your own efforts, so well done.

Primrose

I know the costs will have been slightly different when you were younger , but if you look at these costs for bringing up a child, your mum may well be thinking that all that's happening is she's finally getting some of her money back !

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/11360819/Average-cost-of-raising-a-child-in-UK-230000.html

SuzieSue

Yes, it would have been nice if your mother had given you a share of her inheritance, I know I would have done if I had children and many parents do.

Unfortunately she hasn't so there isn't much you can do. Also, remember that many people (me included) did not have grandparents who left anything after their funeral costs were paid, so you are far from alone.

Don't let it eat you up as it will ruin your life. You can't rely on an inheritance because care home fees are so high so anything you get will be a bonus.

annandale

It's not automatic that the OPs mother will have to go into a care home. Many people live at home until the end of their lives.

SuzieSue

annandale wrote: »

It's not automatic that the OPs mother will have to go into a care home. Many people live at home until the end of their lives.

Yes, of course they do.

balletshoes

HeavyMetalFan wrote: »

I can't decide if I feel a bit badly done to or if I don't really have any entitlement.

My Mother is an only child (as am I) and she was the sole beneficiary of her parent's estate, which was basically a very well looked after bungalow with decent sized gardens. I was not named in the will but I have never seen it nor asked to.

My Mother is in a strong financial position and does not "need" the money. The house has been sold to a young family and was a private sale so I have no idea how much it sold for - she has never told me and I did not ask.

I have no idea how much of the money she had spent and again I habebt asked. She has spent some of the money on me - mainly on things for my house which I didn't ask for and didn't really need but it is easier just to say yes. I would say this came to £2,500 to £3,000.

There are times when I feel that due to the size of the inheritance and the fact that she has not had to split this, I should be told how much she received and that I should have been given between 10 to 25%. There are other times when I feel that it is her legal entitlement and I should stop being so selfish.

What would you do in my Mother's position and how would you feel if you were me?

I'm not you, but my feelings on inheritance in general are fairly straightforward - your parent's money is hers, to do with as she wishes in her lifetime. Its not your money, any of it, and you have no right to expect to receive any of it.

Person_one

If you won £50,000 on the lottery, how much do you think your mum would be entitled to?