Mooloo's Joining up the dots in 2017

Savvy_Sue

Mooloo wrote: »

Another day where I struggle to move on waking up.
My ankles are especially stiff so coming down stairs was difficult.

Mooloo, I've had that problem and now I rarely get out of bed without circling my ankles, and flexing and stretching my feet. I do it at the same time as my shoulder exercises, and spend about five minutes on it.

Savvy_sewing

Savvy_Sue wrote: »

Mooloo, I've had that problem and now I rarely get out of bed without circling my ankles, and flexing and stretching my feet. I do it at the same time as my shoulder exercises, and spend about five minutes on it.

I normally stretch etc while the kettle boils, and the cools a bit.
But I didn't really leave myself enough time.

Savvy_sewing

Dgd is visiting her Grandad with her Aunty, BF is on an adventure weekend god knows where. I am home from work and chilling with old episodes of NCIS.!
I know I should be doing jobs around the house but there is always tomorrow!
( I have the washing machine on, and will move it on when necessary).

Savvy_sewing

Just broken one of my back teeth eating a piece of cheese! Owww toothache already.
Dgd on her way home.
Two episodes of NCIS watched. Two washing loads finished and third in. But not hung up yet as I plan on having a bubble bath with candles and book first.

Slinky

Ouch sorry to hear about the tooth, I hope you've got an NHS dentist.

beanielou

Boo to the tooth.

Savvy_sewing

So, I didn't even get dressed yesterday!
I woke up in a very very low mood and with a cup of tea beside me I started to write my diary. First the update of the previous few days activity and then, I wrote what was going on in my mind. I wrote for hours! I was going to go for a bath, dye my hair, sort out the clothes mountain, take Dgd out somewhere and do the food shopping!
I wrote for my sanity, I wrote about struggling to reach my dreams and when I started to write, I was ready to give up on my dreams.
I was/am restless and frustrated with my self.
I stopped for a while to watch Annie the movie with Dgd, and then I only kept the washing going, and tumble dried some of it afterwards. I drank copious amounts of tea and occasionally picked my diary back up to write somemore. Then I watched Youve got Mail on the tv, and Dgd popped to the shop for yoghurt and fruit. I chatted to my brother who rang me on Skype and then spent hours looking at semi ruins in rural Portugal!
I don't have time to tell it all over again here.
But I have decided that I need to still have a dream or goal or I am lost.
I don't know how to make my dreams work at the moment because of my family and my BF. But at the beginning of my writing it became obvious that I would probably either have to give up on my dreams if I stayed with BF, and yet I didn't want to give up on him. I should be happy and I am lucky that I have a roof over my head, that Dgd is happy here, that work is doing quite well, that it is indeed a saleable business, that I get the best of both worlds with BF. But should and actual are two very different things.
I still want to spend a lot of time in Portugal, sooner rather than later, but with my financial history I need a miracle! With BF I know that he will never leave his place or Family, and if I did have a place abroad then I don't know that we would have each other.
Yet when I think about living here, and doing the same things years later, I am horrified by the thought, I feel trapped in a house I don't like, and in a mundane life, with superficial friends ( I have two real friends but I rarely see them now, life takes us in different directions), I want to run!!!!
So I can't run until I can afford it!
So from today I am going to start to put away 20% of my income not 10%, and I am going to look for other income streams to find another 10%.
I I have to find a way out of this feeling of being trapped.

Feral_Moon

Have you thought about maybe writing a book?

beedeedee

Rather than bricks and mortar in Portugal, have you thought about a caravan being kept over there? Plenty of nice sites and if you have a long stay pitch or put it in storage, very reasonable. Touring caravans can be easily moved if you want a change of scenery. You could go over whenever the fancy took you and if you decided to make it a permanent move eventually....we'll you'd have somewhere to live till you found the dream property. Just a thought, it might make one dream a little closer?

Savvy_sewing

Feral_Moon wrote: »

Have you thought about maybe writing a book?

Often but I wouldn't know where to begin as all my writing is about my life and my thoughts so not a thriller or a best seller.
Have wondered about doing a sewing book, but again so many out there!
I am not sure if I have the imagination for fiction!