From debt to freedom...

Honeysucklelou2

Yesterday was a slower paced day as the weather was very different. We've had glorious sunshine for days so the downpour yesterday was a bit of a shock! I used the time to tackle the ironing mountain, which I've halved but not completely finished. Two of the DDs decided that would bramble chop at the allotment for me, despite the rain which I'm very thankful for.

Today is pay day so last night I did take time to go through and allocate everything. The little surplus this month will be taken up with birthdays. Today is birthday 2 of the 8. DS2 has requested tea on the beach and us playing laser tag locally. Unfortunately DS3 has been up for much of the night with earache so not sure how energetic he or I will be during the game!

Off to Mr T's in a minute to get ingredients for pancakes and birthday cake.

crazy_cat_lady

Happy birthday #2 - and more pancakes. That raspberry and white chocolate cake sounds amazing!
Hope you're ok today - looks as though you were up early this morning.

Cherryfudge

Happy birthday DS2! I hope the earache and tiredness don't put too much of a dampener on things - ditto for the weather.
Living near a beach hasn't been on my bucket list (it's on DH's) but every time I read your thread, I get a step nearer to changing my priorities. I am in danger of overusing the word 'idyllic'. Money-saving-wise, too, it has to be a wonderful move: you seem to have endless hours of fun just being there, and I am sure your children will always go back to beaches to unwind.
Have a lovely day.

Honeysucklelou2

Thank you CCL and Cherryfudge.

Thankfully DS3 woke up bright and breezy and ready to go. He did very well at the laser tag. I think he's the youngest they have ever had but he joined in with gusto! We all enjoyed the laser tag. 90 minutes flew by! We came home for birthday pancakes, a tradition in our house.

The beach is an amazing place. It's gone full circle as most of my childhood memories are of visiting beaches with my parents, grandparents and cousins. I love taking my lot to the beach...teaching them to both enjoy it and respect it. My older DDs now go from choice and DD2 has just got into paddle-boarding which seems a delightful way to relax ( from where I'm standing on the beach!).

It's been a bit of a spendy day due to birthday celebrations but hopefully the ex will chip in for food later.

savingholmes

Sounds like fun at the beach.

Honeysucklelou2

:wave:Hi Saving Holmes, thanks for dropping by.

The birthday went well until later in the evening. The ex went to pick up DD1 from work. Usually I do it but I was dealing with something with DD2 and couldn't. Unfortunately DD1 came back in a stressed state because she'd had to listen to the ex blaming me and my family for the demise of our marriage . I don't know what makes me more frustrated, that he should use the rare time he had with her to have such a rant or that my poor parents who have treated him with kindness and politeness throughout should be lied about:mad::mad::(

The one downside to being at home is that I realise how many times the ex comes to the house. This morning I was about to walk out of the bedroom door and he was outside the door. I hadn't even heard him drive here or enter the house:eek:. The 2 close birthdays have meant he has been around more too. Today I have made sure that I've been either busy or out to avoid having any more communication than is absolutely necessary.

The direct debits left my account today so mortgage and bills are paid . I've been reading Foxgloves' diary with awe at her decluttering project, so I started today. The kitchen food cupboards were turned out and wiped down. For some unknown reason I had 3 partially used pots of bicarbonate of soda :think: so have decanted it all into 1 pot and recycled the other 2 pots. I also discovered I had more mincemeat left over than I thought so must remember when it comes to Christmas time as it's all in date. I also discovered a piece of paper tucked at the back of the cupboard in my grandmother's writing...a recipe for Toffe Apple and pecan cake. I remember her writing it out so I know we did try it once. Must have another go!!

After so much decluttering I had to get out so we got to the beach for the afternoon. It was incredibly packed. I don't think I've ever seen it so busy...good job the tide was out!!

2 loads of washing done and line dried

Lupus_Lou

Sorry to butt in but your exes behaviour is unacceptable.
I haven't read your whole thread but is there any reason why you can't change the locks.
Also, if you have joint debtsyour creditors should write to each of you individually and not jointly.
I work in rent collection and where there are joint tendencies and rent arrears we have to send individual letters to both, even at the same address.
Sorry if this has already been raised.

Lou x

savingholmes

I don't know the circumstances but I too would have changed the locks - probably the first day!

Buffythedebtslayer

Honeysuckle! I never realised you had a diary

Beach sound heavenly.

Cake making daughter sounds awesome.

Ex is a scum bag. Sorry if that sounds harsh and judgey. I mean it in a harsh and judgey way! what a crappy and selfish thing to speak to your daughter like that and WHY is he just coming round to the house all the time??? Can you change the locks?? like tomorrow?

Big hugs and sorry I didn't find you sooner XXXXXX

Honeysucklelou2

:wave:Good to see you Buffy! Thanks for dropping by Lupus Lou. Thank you Saving Holmes.

Unfortunately my solicitor has said that because the property is jointly owned I can't stop him from entering or change the locks until the financial order part is done. I've got all the statements etc prepared but am waiting for my pension provider to get back to me. Then all my part is complete. No idea if the ex has completed his part or not. I do have a new lock barrel and spare keys to change the locks the second I am legally able to do so.

The solicitor did say I was at liberty to return to sender any post that arrives. During term time I'm often the last home so don't always see the post. In the week I've been off I realise that quite a bit of post is arriving including financial stuff, so have redirected those back to sender as he hasn't lived here for over 2 years.

Thank you Lupus Lou, I had no idea that any creditors could send 2 copies of documents separately addressed. I've had to order copies of statements because they have presumably arrived but the ex has got to the post before me and an haven't caught a glimpse of them.