The Illuminative Project.

Bobarella

I was just thinking how positive this update was. Yes you haven't done it all, but you sound like you are being kind to yourself and that's so good.

Chandelier.

Thankyou Bob. It does seem a lot more positive then recent weeks.

So last night I went to the gym with my mum and met my cousin there. It felt like it was a right family outing lol. My cousin and I have said we'll do some classes together so we've booked onto the leg, bums and tums for Wednesday night. I don't think he realises most of the class is ladies but I'm actually quite excited for it. Today I've decided to get back on the bandwagon of watching what I eat and monitoring times when I crave junk food. I'm hoping to distract myself from this.

This morning I've been to the doctors and picked up a prescription. I have also arranged a meeting for today to meet with someone regarding my personal development this morning. We were thankfully able to fit one another in so it's time to discuss my options and work out the next steps forward.

I also may be attending a catch up CBT class this afternoon. I'm awaiting confirmation of the times and if I can fit it in then it's a bonus.

I've quite a few things I need to do today so here is my list.

- Attend meeting with work place regarding personal development goals and set out dates to attend. Figure out the more important ones and do these first.
- Use up potatoes and make up some mashed potato for tea and freeze what's left.
- Fill in the boys passport details. His dad finally sent his over.
- Update banking and work out remainder of my budget.
- Attend CBT session if able to.
- Refill my medication pot for the week ahead.
- Phone the boys school and enquire about breakfast club for the end of the week.
- Tidy kitchen.

So I have quite a few things to do really, some are more important than others. We'll see how I get on but I like lists, they make me feel as if I've accomplished something even if only small things.

In my next post I'll update what I'd like to achieve each week in regards to my goals. I'll also add an extra post to update my debt totals.

Chandelier.

Morning!

So yesterday ended up being a successful day in regards to getting things done.

My original to do list as follows from yesterday:-

-[STRIKE]Attend meeting with work place regarding personal development goals and set out dates to attend. Figure out the more important ones and do these first. [/STRIKE] So I met up with the person who is in charge of training. I was very nervous as last time I saw this person they made me cry and feel awful about myself (Just before I went off). In hindsight I don't think this was the intention, I was just more sensitive and vulnerable back then. Anyhow we had a catch up and have agreed what my training needs are and which to undertake. She was happy for me to take lead and choose which ones I thought would be beneficial and all that's left to do is recieve confirmation I am booked onto these.

-[STRIKE] Use up potatoes and make up some mashed potato for tea and freeze what's left.[/STRIKE] I used up half the potatoes and made the mash for tea. The rest has been frozen. I'll use the remaining potatoes to make a potato and leek soup today.

- [STRIKE]Fill in the boys passport details. His dad finally sent his over. [/STRIKE] I've completed this and have sent it with my mum to be countersigned by someone who has known us since forever. I'll pick it up later on and get it sent off through check and send at the post office.

- Update banking and work out remainder of my budget. I will do that this morning. Yesterday was hectic and none stop. It will only take me five minutes.

- [STRIKE]Attend CBT session if able to. [/STRIKE]
I attended this session and caught up with what I missed whilst away last week. The session was very helpful regarding stress triggers and how to deal with stress. I'm also not there as I'm on a course next week so I've arranged a catch up session for following week.

-[STRIKE] Refill my medication pot for the week ahead. [/STRIKE] All medication dispensed into pots including additional new medication for next six weeks. This organisation brings me satisfaction.

- [STRIKE]Phone the boys school and enquire about breakfast club for the end of the week. [/STRIKE] The boy is booked in for this Thursday and next Thursday/Friday as I've early starts. This means my mum can take him on her way to work. The boy loves breakfast club.

- [STRIKE]Tidy kitchen[/STRIKE]. Kitchen tidied and cleaned. I will look at doing a big deep clean at some point in upcoming weeks including sorting cupboards etc..

In the afternoon I had a nap as for some reason I was really exhausted. When I woke I had my tea and went to the gym with my cousin and my mum which was fun. I much prefer going with other people. I am comfortable going myself but sometimes it's nice to catch up with others or help and encourage one another.

If I'm on my own I usually just listen to music. I like sp0tify however I refuse to pay £9.99 a month for it whilst times are tight. After some googling I found an offer for £1.99 for two months which I've kindly took advantage off using a extra email address I have lol:rotfl:! So if you look at it from the point of view of me paying two months at full price compared to this offer, I've saved £17.99 .

I've also decided to change my medication routine and see if taking it earlier in the evening makes it easier to wake in morning. Especially for the 7:30am starts I will be undertaking. It's not going to be a quick fix but hopefully I can get back into a routine soon. If I'd of known these shift patterns were to occur weeks ago I'd have already prepared myself.

I've not much happening today, just a few small things. So here we go:-

Tuesday's to do list.

- Finalise course bookings and enter into diary.
- Phone manager at work and update on work situation and where I'm at. We keep missing one another when phoning.
- Attend course today which is for an hour in total. (I've already done this but fancy a refresher).
- Pick up the boys passport after being countersigned and get it sent off.
- Update banking and budget for rest of month.
- Cancel boys extra curricular for Thursday/Friday as it clashes with work schedule and other planned things. (This will save me £)
- Walk to school to pick boy up. He has late finish today. I might even take his scooter and use it myself on the way. Big kid and all that
- Message roofers who did some work for us and query something and get guarantee paperwork they promised.

So this has ended up a longer post then I envisioned. I've still yet to post my weekly goals and updated debt totals but it's not the end of the world.

Things seem a lot brighter and I hope they stay this way :T

SpekySquarehead

Go you! Very productive and today looks to be much the same.

Scott_Weiland_2

Hi Chandelier do you not think thats a hell of a lot to change just looking at your list on the 12th of march. Brilliant you have a plan etc etc but thats a lot i can only comment from my own point of view ie you know my medical history but that would stress me out a tiny bit and break it down to 2-3 things every month.

Chandelier.

Hey Scott! I agree it does look alot but it's one I posted at the beginning of the year and somethings will hopefully form into place and become habits. I don't look at this religiously and think I need to do XYZ and then tick it off. I know which areas put the most pressure on.. Work related pressure is the biggy for me so it's finding that fine balance. Money wise, as long as things tick over nicely and debt reduction takes place, I've decided no longer to become obsessed with watching the numbers reduce each time they reach a new below level if that makes sense.

In regards to what I managed to get done yesterday it was a pretty successful day.

Yesterday's to do list :-

- [STRIKE]Finalise course bookings and enter into diary. [/STRIKE] All courses booked and finalised for upcoming months.
- [STRIKE]Phone manager at work and update on work situation and where I'm at. We keep missing one another when phoning[/STRIKE]. Manager updated on progress made and seems to be happy
She's just going to query a couple things in regards to what's classed as my return to work date. I think this is making a mountain out of a molehill, but whatever I'll just go with it. It's my first shift back tomorrow.
- [STRIKE]Attend course today which is for an hour in total.[/STRIKE] Course done, just need to do reflection based on this. Very informative session and a nice refresher.
[STRIKE]- Pick up the boys passport after being countersigned and get it sent off. [/STRIKE]Passport signed, checked by PO and sent off. Hopefully it will not take too long.
- [STRIKE]Update banking and budget for rest of month. [/STRIKE] All updated and clear for rest of month.
- Cancel boys extra curricular for Thursday/Friday as it clashes with work and other planned things. (This will save me £) Will do this today
[STRIKE]- Walk to school to pick boy up. He has late finish today. I might even take his scooter and use it myself on the way. Big kid and all that [/STRIKE] I ended up driving as I was out and about at the time running errands and was on the way.
- Message roofers who did some work for us and query something and get guarantee paperwork they promised.
Will do this today.

So overall a pretty successful day yesterday, it kept me busy at least. I also made potato and leek soup to freeze and a big batch of spaghetti bolognese.

Wednesday To Do List

- Message roofers.
- Message to cancel extra curricular for Thursday/Friday
- Send email regarding a show the boy wants to participate in.
- Attend CBT group.
-Go the gym with my cousin, we have a class booked.
- Sort out washing and peg on line to dry.
- Look in my portfolio and see what needs doing first.
- Contact CPN and update where I'm up to.

Hope everyone has a nice day.

Chandelier.

So it's been quite a few days since I last updated and I guess quite a few things have happened since then.

I managed to complete the to do list that I posted last Wednesday. I'm still awaiting to hear back from roofers, I had an initial reply but nothing since. I'll message again later.

I returned to work last Thursday and did two short shifts Thursday and Friday. If I'm honest it completely wiped me as I've been off for so long. Once I'm back into a routine I expect I shall find it more easier. I have a training day this Wednesday and two 7.5 hour shifts Thursday and Friday again. This week is rather busy for many reasons.

The boy has an upcoming show at the beginning of April. He's only doing one routine but there is lots of practice in the run up to it.

Tonight I'm off to watch him do his swimming lesson. I've not seen him swim for a while as his dad usually takes him on the days he has him. I've then a class booked at the gym later on.

It's my friends birthday today so I shall drop off her card and present later. Its a big birthday for her so I bought her, her favourite tipple. I can't go wrong there. I was thinking about a bunch of flowers too but I know previous years she's recieved lots and struggles for space to put them.

Tomorrow I've not much planned aside from an appointment at doctors later in the day. I will make an effort to go to the gym.

Wednesday I have training as mentioned above. Then the boy has his extra curricular activity. I'll probably get home around 7ish.

Thursday I'm in work until half three. The boy is going to his friends for tea and then has yet another show rehearsal to attend. And Friday remains to be the same.

In regards to his costume for the show I've managed to piece something together and ordered the extra bits yesterday which should hopefully come towards the end of the week then we can try it all on.

I've paid a lump sum towards our holiday, only eight weeks to go now. I put the remaining balance onto a 0% credit card I'd not used for a while which has the offer remaining for the next nine months. Although I had money set aside to pay the full balance, I've decided to keep some funds back for upcoming expenses in the next month or so including my car servicing. That's another thing I need to look at and may head over to the motoring board for advice.

This weekend was pretty chilled. On Saturday we made some chocolate rice crispy cakes and then the boy helped cook tea- homemade KFC style chicken which was lovely and enjoyed by both of us.

I still need to get back on the band wagon of healthy eating. I managed 4/7 days last week then just went off track. I need to get back into the right mentality for it.

So not much else happening aside from this. I've not been spending much aside from necessities. I need to phone up payroll and ask that they have the correct details for my pay this week. I don't want another wage messed up.

Other then that not much else to say.

Bobarella

I hope your son's show will be really lovely!

SpekySquarehead

Good to hear your back to work. As you say, it'll take a bit of time to get back into the routine.

Scott_Weiland_2

Ace your back to work its hard going back dont i know it but it helps being back in a routine