I'm truly pathetic and just need to off load

Elinore

I was knocked off my bike in a hit and run. The impact sheared my front teeth clean off. I smashed and chipped several others.

It made me face my fear as the work had to be done, and do you know what i feel 100 times better because i own it. Yup i hate it still. I sweat throughout and get tense but i do it anyway - its very liberating.

I dont have fear of pain, mine is because they are all up in my mouth i cant breathe. I start to panic. I found having a 'stop signal' and a dentist that understood, was kind and very happy to help made a world of difference. Trust me, they dont judge, in fact they were so helpful and wonderful about the whole thing it deflated my nerves tremendously.

I know its not the dentist itself that is the issue - you have a phobia but i hope hearing that they just want to help you have the treatment you need, with no judgment will help you a little.

(saying that i have a endo appt on monday and i am already sweating - but i will still go!)

Loz01

OP your fear is understandable! You should speak to your doctor about CBT, it can be very useful in helping you get over your worries. Also join a new dentist that is sympathetic to nervous patients, they might just want you to go in to the building and have a quick chat to start off with rather than dive right in to the appt.

suejb2

Don't be hard on yourself. Maybe post on Health & Beauty saving, there are a couple of dentists who offer advise, Toothsmith and Brook2jack are two I recall. Good luck .

ripplyuk

Try this forum:

http://www.dentalfearcentral.org/forum/

Lots of useful tips and everyone there is very supportive. There's also a section where you can find a dentist that's recommended by other terrified people.

Kaye1

My daughter had a terrible dentist and she was terrified. I rang the surgery and explained she was very nervous.
They were brilliant. They gave her an extra long appointment so she didn't feel rushed. The dentist explained every single thing she was doing. And I mean everything. She also gave reasons- which seemed to help her. So for example, she explained what the instrument was and what she needed it for.
She also arranged a 'hand up' signal- so if she felt that she couldn't cope, she just raised her hand and the dentist would stop instantly.

And as for judging you- honestly, they've seen it all before. My good friend is a doctor and I once asked her how she dealt with embarrassing problems. She said that actually, in her head, she is just going through a mental checklist of all the things she needs to ask/prescribe and she isn't embarrassed at all. I'm sure dentists are the same- they are probably just working out what to do and in what order to do it.
Good luck.

brook2jack

An everyday part of a dentists working life is dealing with frightened people and dealing with people who haven't been for years.

Everyone says the same thing , they are frightened of being told off for leaving it too long, or for neglecting their teeth etc.

Every dentist has people in every day with those sort of fears.

Some dentists are particularly good at helping people overcome their fears. Very occasionally some people cannot overcome their fears and need to be referred to community dentists for sedation to help them overcome their fears. However the referral process can take months or longer.

Now , while you are not in pain and don't need very urgent treatment, is a good time to get recommendations from friends and family and make the first appointment. That is the most difficult part just getting through the door the first time.

The very worst time to find a good dentist and overcome your fears is if you leave it until you have an emergency and will have little choice about who you see and timings of treatment.

You will have to see a dentist eventually and you can choose to do it now , under your own control, and find a dentist who will suit you and help you become healthy again, or you can wait until you have an emergency and take pot luck.

A dentist will say the most satisfying part of the job is taking someone who is terrified through the journey from lots of problems to a confident person with a lovely healthy mouth.

You can make the start of that journey.it just needs a phone call.

Potternerd

Absolutely agree about CBT, it can be brilliant for dealing with anxieties and fears.
I would also echo other posters; you aren't being silly and you clearly had a horrendous experience. Hope you find a sympathetic dentist!

Tigsteroonie

brook2jack wrote: »

Now , while you are not in pain and don't need very urgent treatment, is a good time to get recommendations from friends and family and make the first appointment. That is the most difficult part just getting through the door the first time.

The very worst time to find a good dentist and overcome your fears is if you leave it until you have an emergency and will have little choice about who you see and timings of treatment.

The above is very good advice. I only got Marley to a dentist 5 years ago because he was in agony. He had a second emergency appointment 3 years ago - and met a lovely dentist, who was incredibly understanding and patient. We made a deal with her that both of us would start having regular appointments so that we didn't end up in an emergency again (and have no choice about who to see).

We go again on Tuesday this week - back to back checkups, so that we can support each other through what we still find a very unpleasant but necessary process. And by support, I mean physically - it normally involves helping to pin each other's legs down on the dental chair so as not to kick out, and then holding each other up as we stagger back home for a cool brew

borkid

Northern78 wrote: »

Funnily enough the surgery is still there physically but apparently not long after my 'episode' with them, he left.

It's crazy, it's not just a mental thing, I actually sweat, shake and and feel sick if I see a sign for a dentist! What an idiot! I need someone to drag me by the scruff of the neck and put me in the chair. I'm such a nob! (excuse the language)

That could still be a mental thing. I used to have the same with performance nerves, I really wanted to play in public but the very idea set me into a panic attack including at one point being physically sick. If you have the money have you thought of either hypnotherapy or EMDR? I found for me EMDR worked best I still use techniques I learnt in any stressful situation including dentist visits. I suggest you talk to your GP in some areas you can get EMDR on the NHS.

Primrose

You're not pathetic. Many people have phobias - dentists, spiders, fear of flying, whatever. You were probably just unlucky to have a very poor dental practice. I travel to a dentist in a very run down area a long way from my home but keep going there because she is an excellent dentist so don't necessarily judge dental practices by their external appearances.
Might be worth asking your GP for good local recommendations, and check their Quality Care Commission reports. Also ask your neighbourswho they use and thwirnopinionnof them. Most dental work is fairly painless these days, although I know with your nervousness in the chair your emotional discomfort may be higher than many experience. Please don't let your fears hold you back. Once you've overcome your initial fear you may well wonder what held you back for so long.