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I WILL be Debt Free but need help

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  • Bobarella
    Bobarella Posts: 10,824 Forumite
    Savvy Shopper! I've been Money Tipped!
    Small treats are a great motivator Hiraeth. We all need a little something to look forward to.
    " Your vibe attracts your tribe":D

    Debt neutral :) 27/03/17 from £40k:eek: in the hole 2012.
    Roadkill 17 £56.58 2016-£62.28 2015- £84.20)
    RYSAW17 £1900 2016 £2,535.16 2015 £1027.20
  • Hiraeth
    Hiraeth Posts: 55 Forumite
    Ninth Anniversary
    I'm back with a bit of an update. I've been feeling a bit frustrated over the past week because I've really felt the need to - no not need, but want - to go out and splurge a bit of money.


    I've been shopping for Christmas presents, having made lists and being very very careful to choose things that will be welcomed, liked and used by the person to who they are being given, and so far I've been able to stick to it.


    However, there is a fine line between getting what you know they will like and use BUT also adding to it something you also want to get them because YOU like it and would like to give it to them.


    My family don't expect gifts - just token things that we know each other will like. But it's MY want to give them something really special that catches my eye and that I would like to give them.


    It's hard keeping the hand and purse in the pocket but I'm doing it.


    But my frustration has been improved somewhat by my swagbuck points adding up to enough to get a $50 voucher. That also has been mind numbing and has meant keep logging in to the computer as there are not lists and lists of surveys to complete, but I manage to find a couple a day. So am pleased that I have got that and I will keep on as I have two grandchildren with birthdays in January and 2 children with birthdays in February. So I should have enough by mid January to buy each a 'token' gift - as long as I keep my head down and log on a couple of times a day.


    Good luck to everyone else who is struggling like me, particularly as Christmas comes near and with it the added expenses.
  • Hiraeth
    Hiraeth Posts: 55 Forumite
    Ninth Anniversary
    Here's my latest update. Haven't managed to pay anything else off my credit card - balance still the same - however, have managed to earn a $75 gift card which I have just redeemed and which I will be able to use for birthday presents in the new year. Just have to do the right thing and make sure I transfer the amount I would have spent off my credit card. Hope that everyone else is managing to knock the odd dollar or so off their debt.
  • Bobarella
    Bobarella Posts: 10,824 Forumite
    Savvy Shopper! I've been Money Tipped!
    Hi Hiraeth

    Funny enough I was just wondering how you were getting on so I'm glad you posted.
    Your signature has disappeared did you realise?

    I know exactly what you mean on feeling frustrated. We aren't known for our rational thinking us humans!

    Well done on getting £50 dollars too that's great work.

    Bob
    " Your vibe attracts your tribe":D

    Debt neutral :) 27/03/17 from £40k:eek: in the hole 2012.
    Roadkill 17 £56.58 2016-£62.28 2015- £84.20)
    RYSAW17 £1900 2016 £2,535.16 2015 £1027.20
  • Hiraeth
    Hiraeth Posts: 55 Forumite
    Ninth Anniversary
    Hi Bob - what do you mean my signature has disappeared? I haven't been on the forum long enough to know the ins and outs. Do you know how I get it back?
  • Hiraeth
    Hiraeth Posts: 55 Forumite
    Ninth Anniversary
    I love Christmas, it's one of my most favourite times of the year. It's a looking back at childhood thing. As a child it was the only time we received presents (comes from coming from a large poor family), and my parents would work hard all year to make Christmas Day and Boxing Day special. I know I have always tried to re-create that feeling in my own family and I have to admit that somewhere along the way I got a bit lost between feelings and possessions. I think I thought the more I bought my family then the better it would be, so I would buy more and then a bit more and then would still be disappointed because despite all the buying it wasn't the same. It took a while to realise that the gifts and presents couldn't make up for the 'feelings' that I was trying to re-create.


    So I have tried in the last couple of years to cut down on the spending and remember that my family don't want or need them. They also want the happy memories I had. But with all the good will in the world it has not been easy and although I thought that this year it would be easier it hasn't been.


    But - I hang on to the thought that when Christmas is over this year I will owe no more than I did before Christmas. So while walking through the shops and looking at things I would like to buy I just try and keep that thought in mind. I have of course bought gifts, but these have been bought slowly throughout the last few months, and I have to admit that they have actually been brought with a lot more thought! Where I might have previously picked up a game (or whatever) for $30, I now come home and do an internet search and see if I can get it cheaper elsewhere, or even a cheaper similar item - and how pleased I am when I do save money.


    Yes it takes extra time - but it is worth it because I don't have to put it on my credit card and then I don't have to sit and have that horrible sick feeling and a feeling of fear if I have to check my balance online.


    Of course what I still owe frightens the life out of me - but at least I am not adding to it.
  • ani*fan
    ani*fan Posts: 1,554 Forumite
    1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    I just wanted to say that I understand your difficulties with christmas shopping. Doing it within a budget means you do have to think long and hard about each individual in your family, what they like, how they are and this undoubtedly leads to some thoughts about your relationship with them.

    The first year I stopped using credit cards and mindlessly throwing money at the situation was a real eye opener. My older brother moved quite far away and rarely comes home. I used to send ridiculously expensive gifts to him and his family then feel dreadful looking at the credit card statement. Now I have to ponder that fact that I barely know him any more, and that's very painful, but the budgeted gift of treats or other token gesture I send at christmas lets him know that I think about him and I'm here and open to much better communication than we currently have, should he ever be able for that. And that's enough. The difficult feelings are where they belong, and not on my credit card bill.

    Best of luck as you navigate this. It does get easier.

    And well done on your debt reduction! :T You're doing great. I wish you could get rid of the interest though, still no chance of getting a 0% deal? It might be worth trying.

    AF :)
    If you know you have enough, you're rich. ;)
  • ani*fan
    ani*fan Posts: 1,554 Forumite
    1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    p.s. about your signature, I don't think you had created one, I think you are adding a list of your debts to your post, which is fine, but if you want to make a signature then go to 'User CP' along the top tool bar, then look down the lefthand side and click on 'edit signature'. Your signature will appear at the bottom of every post without you having to do anything. ;)
    If you know you have enough, you're rich. ;)
  • Bobarella
    Bobarella Posts: 10,824 Forumite
    Savvy Shopper! I've been Money Tipped!
    Hiraeth wrote: »
    Hi Bob - what do you mean my signature has disappeared? I haven't been on the forum long enough to know the ins and outs. Do you know how I get it back?

    Looking at it again it hasn't. I thought you had one but it was just written into your post.
    A lot of users like myself keep a note of their totals to pay, challenges they are part of, in their signature. Your running total reducing could go in there.
    " Your vibe attracts your tribe":D

    Debt neutral :) 27/03/17 from £40k:eek: in the hole 2012.
    Roadkill 17 £56.58 2016-£62.28 2015- £84.20)
    RYSAW17 £1900 2016 £2,535.16 2015 £1027.20
  • Bobarella
    Bobarella Posts: 10,824 Forumite
    Savvy Shopper! I've been Money Tipped!
    ani*fan wrote: »
    p.s. about your signature, I don't think you had created one, I think you are adding a list of your debts to your post, which is fine, but if you want to make a signature then go to 'User CP' along the top tool bar, then look down the lefthand side and click on 'edit signature'. Your signature will appear at the bottom of every post without you having to do anything. ;)

    Thanks ani:)
    " Your vibe attracts your tribe":D

    Debt neutral :) 27/03/17 from £40k:eek: in the hole 2012.
    Roadkill 17 £56.58 2016-£62.28 2015- £84.20)
    RYSAW17 £1900 2016 £2,535.16 2015 £1027.20
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