Selling the house, need permission from other adult occupants

somuchindebt

Ok AdrianC you are not intending to be hostile, but your comments are unnecessary and hurtful. I do know that we need to move out to get the money for the house. I am acting now based on my worries, to get equipped with some knowledge just in case something does happen. It may not even be a problem. But my husband made couple of comments recently that got me very worried. I don't need you to rub my face in my tragedy

marksoton

somuchindebt wrote: »

Ok AdrianC you are not intending to be hostile, but your comments are unnecessary and hurtful. I do know that we need to move out to get the money for the house. I am acting now based on my worries, to get equipped with some knowledge just in case something does happen. It may not even be a problem. But my husband made couple of comments recently that got me very worried. I don't need you to rub my face in my tragedy

But you're clearly not addressing the issues.

Time to take your head out of the sand. Especially with 3 children.

AdrianC

somuchindebt wrote: »

Ok AdrianC you are not intending to be hostile, but your comments are unnecessary and hurtful. I do know that we need to move out to get the money for the house. I am acting now based on my worries, to get equipped with some knowledge just in case something does happen. It may not even be a problem. But my husband made couple of comments recently that got me very worried. I don't need you to rub my face in my tragedy

I can only assume you've completely misunderstood my comments about being liable for the costs of others, in the event your husband decides to have the "I don't want to move" tantrum (your fear of which prompted your question, after all) at the time of moving, rather than when it's just a paperwork question...

Marvel1

somuchindebt wrote: »

Bonfire, he is not happy to sell as it's convenient for him, he has his own bedroom, does not pay anything towards the bills. He buys the food and we should all be grateful for that... Unless of course we have an argument then I have to buy food as well. Yes, all marriages go through tricky times, but mine is just very tricky one..

First of all, I aplogise how blunt this is going to be:
When you and your husband move to your new property, you should split the bills 50/50 - or close too, not all you.

If not, why are you with him?

somuchindebt

What do you mean that I am not addressing my issues? I have not burried my head in the sand. Why are you saying so? I want to sell the house, settle debts and start fresh with or without my husband. Yes, I have 3 children that I need to worry abut as their fathers are useless and horrible people. Yes, I have been stupid enough to get myself into this situation but I think I am actually doing something about it. Or tell me, what should I do? Just wait until my house gets repossessed or something? Go bankrupt? This is the last resort! I suggested counselling to my husband, I spoke to his parents, I have been pushing him to go to GP... Tell me Marksoton, what do I need to do. Ho do I address the issues? Have you been in my situation? Have you got better idea? Ok, please tell me, I want to do something right for once...

marksoton

somuchindebt wrote: »

What do you mean that I am not addressing my issues? I have not burried my head in the sand. Why are you saying so? I want to sell the house, settle debts and start fresh with or without my husband. Yes, I have 3 children that I need to worry abut as their fathers are useless and horrible people. Yes, I have been stupid enough to get myself into this situation but I think I am actually doing something about it. Or tell me, what should I do? Just wait until my house gets repossessed or something? Go bankrupt? This is the last resort! I suggested counselling to my husband, I spoke to his parents, I have been pushing him to go to GP... Tell me Marksoton, what do I need to do. Ho do I address the issues? Have you been in my situation? Have you got better idea? Ok, please tell me, I want to do something right for once...

http://www.mumsnet.com/

These people will be better suited to your taste....

AdrianC

marksoton wrote: »

http://www.mumsnet.com/

These people will be better suited to your taste....

I was about to suggest http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/forumdisplay.php?f=24

Honestly, OP, your root problem is not a house selling one. That's a symptom. Your root problem is definitely a relationship one...

eddddy

somuchindebt wrote: »

... I do know that we need to move out to get the money for the house.

Just to make sure you really do understand. It's actually worse than that.

If you exchange contracts, and then your husband doesn't move out - you could be sued for damages.

In an old thread from 2009, somebody had to pay over £30k in damages because they didn't move out after exchanging contracts. See: https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/comment/24724055#Comment_24724055

If you think there is a real risk of problems, it might be better if you made sure your husband vacated the house before you exchange contracts.

Then, if he refuses to go, you can decide your next steps without the risk of being sued hanging over you.

catshark88

Somuchdebt, this is a very practical part of the forum, with a number of regular posters who have a lot of knowledge about the selling and buying process.

I totally understand that you are in a horrid situation and are feeling fragile, but the posters above are not meaning offence, just to warn you about the considerable problems created if a sale does not complete properly after any exchange.

The Relationships section of Mumsnet is fab for support and advice about the personal side of your situation, but please do listen to the advice given here about the property side.

With best wishes.

barbiedoll

How often does he go back to "his flat" at his parents place? Could you tell him to stay there for a few weeks/months, saying that you want a "break"? Are there any utility bills in his name?

You could contact the council and take his name off the council tax bill, likewise with any utility bills. The council may well ask for a forwarding address for him, if so, give them his parents address.

You can then legitimately claim that he is not living at your house, and you can carry on with the sale.

You need to be hard-headed about this and not let your relationship problems affect your judgement. You can work on the marriage when you have sold your house, don't let yourself be held to ransom by him at this stage. If you take away his power, he can't hold it over you.