Selling the house, need permission from other adult occupants

[Deleted User]

To be honest, the next time he leaves to go to his parents, I'd change all the locks (vids on YouTube as to how to do this).

BUT having been in a similiar situation, as posts on here have said, that is only part of the problem. With alcoholics/abusers, there is a victim but that person has to agree somewhere to be a victim.. They may be a victim, but they are also an enabler. There is someone who is being manipulated (otherwise the alcoholic wouldn't be there, refusing to pay his way, drinking with all the problems that causes, and causing or at least not helping with the debt problem. He isn't having many consequences if he can walk out when you get irate, and then walk back in still not facing consequences because he is allowed to walk back in and not indulge in conversation about what's happened. He shouldn't be able to walk back in without a long term change). These are big complicated issues, and you need to get advice on how to deal with them. It took me nearly a decade to sort out my head and stop doing the things that allowed my ex to come back. It was awful at the time, but once I started becoming more certain about what was acceptable and what wasn't, and I had a right to acceptable, to not be manipulated, each step became a little bit easier.

I know your brain is probably mush right now, trying to deal with things, its hard to see that that is part of the problem. Like I said, with each step I took, the mush reduced.

I'm afraid I agree, this is your first step.., not selling the house so much.

AnotherJoe

AdrianC wrote: »

"I doubt" isn't really good enough, to be honest. If you cannot deliver vacant possession on completion, life is going to get VERY expensive indeed, because you will be liable for all costs arising from the failure to complete. And that won't just be your buyers, but anybody else down the chain. This might be thousands of pounds...

If your husband really is going to give grief over it, let him get his tantrum out of the way now, when it's just a paperwork delay, rather than when he should be putting his fully-laden toybox into the removal wagon, because the buyers are waiting for the keys...

Not really - if the concept of him moving out is going to causing problems, it's unquestionably best that those problems are dealt with now, rather than rearing their head at the point of completion.

I can't speak for Joe, but I can assure you I'm not intending to be hostile. I just think you're worried about the wrong thing. The question on the form is not your problem.


As far as the buyers are concerned, though, it's just a married couple selling, not a tenanted property. Moving out on exchange would not be normal at all - moving out on completion would be the usual.

I agree but when their solicitor points out there's another adult in the property who hasn't signed this agreement I think things will change.

As for the OP saying I'm "hostile", eh ? OP if you were buying a house from a couple one of whom hasn't signed the documents, what would you do ? Is that hostile or realistic ?

Given you are moving into rented anyway, and your ex ( or is it current, I can't recall) the troubles he could cause by not moving out on completion would be massive and more to the point costly. So as said, head out of sand and deal with the issues Up front, rather than have a big ugly expensive mess on moving day

easilydistracted

I was very tempted to post what dennatrois has, but I would suggest you get some legal advice first. The Citizen's Advice Bureau can identify solicitors who will give you a free half an hour. Be swift and clear with them as obviously they are trying to sell their services.

A couple of things you have mentioned make it sound like he is abusive (rather than just a drunken !!!!). If this is the case Women's aid will help.

I think you did post on the right part of the forum btw, as you need practical advice. But the realistic practical advice is that you need to get him out now as your sale could fall through if he doesn't go and his delaying tactics would be a massive red flag to buyers. I had a friend who was house-sitting for me when I was selling my last place. The buyers tried to insist she was out before exchange but were calmed by her signing that she would leave, as would have always been the case.

Your husband has somewhere to go, he goes there when it suits him. Send him off to his mother's and worry about whether you are having him back when you have sold. If he gets some alcohol treatment all the better, but it wont fix the rest of his behaviour or his personality! Good luck