Money Moral Dilemma: Should I leave my inheritance to just my daughter?

gloriouslyhappy

A big thing to consider is whether the surviving spouse has been provided for - it's quite usual to grant right of abode, meaning although someone else will eventually inherit the property, the surviving spouse has the right to live there until their death or remarriage, whichever comes first. That way, the survivor doesn't have to lose their home as well as their spouse all at the same time. Another reason to have a proper will, and as others have said, it's best to let all interested parties ie children and step-children, know broadly what arrangements are in place.

Avoids having the grieving widow(er) get knocks on the door from beneficiaries wondering when they're going to sell up and move so said beneficiaries can have their inheritance - answer: when I'm carried out in a box!

happyinflorida

1 - have you discussed this with your wife and your kids (do you think of your stepson as your kid or not?)

2 - what are the amounts involved? You say your stepson is going to inherit from his father - is it the same amount say as you leaving half your money to him and half to your own biological daughter?

3 - if you feel the same way about your stepson ie you love him as your own, then as long as your wife and daughter are happy for you to leave him half, then I think you should as you never know what may happen - his dad might not leave him anything.

If you only want to leave your money to your daughter then do so

Be_Happy

If you have a Scottish will, please ignore most of what this thread says. In Scotland there is a thing called 'Legal Rights' where children can inherit a share of your estate (excluding property) no matter what your will says.

As well as any savings in the deceased's name, the estate would include such things as the deceased's personal possessions and half the furniture of the house, etc which would all have to be valued to establish the estate.

meknowalot-51

If the inheritance is split the way your suggesting it would equate to your daughter recieving 75%,do you feel that's fair?Planning out a will's never easy as everything is worked out on assumptions.What if your stepsons only going to recieve about 20k as his dad could possibly want to leave most of it to the rnli?What if your stepson won the lottery or his premium bonds came up,would you tell your wife to give 100% to your daughter?Depending on what happens to your kids could have you changing the will every month.I suggest you and your wife split it equally and let life sort out the rest.

XRAT

If you have an opinion on who you want to leave it to, seek advice. Make a will, make sure your children inherit on your death (if only in title)
You may well trust your wife to do as you wish, but if you pre-decease.., her over the years she may change her mind, or marry a toy-boy who outlives her and passes everything to a child of their own who you never knew at all!
An inheritance has the chance of being as messy as a divorce!

dillydilly

easy one for us at the moment as all three kids are on the "starting line" aged 20, 20 and 17. It will be harder if we're still around in 20 years or so as they have different levels of wealth. If two are loaded with wealthy spouses and one is struggling on their own say, I'd want to help the latter more and hope the first two would agree. I'm from a family of three, we're comfortable, my sister struggles, as does my brother but he chose a big mortgage on a big house. I just encourage my parents to have plenty of holidays while they can and assume care home fees will soak up the rest...

System

If my parents were to split inheritance (tbh i;d rather tthey spend any money they do have on themselves whilst they are alive to enjoy it, they earned it they should have a good life and not worry about what happens afterwards) AFAIK i;d b treated equally to my siblings, My step dad is to me my dad, and he has always treated me as his own daughter. He;s been in my life since i was 4, i'm 30 this year. I have nothing to do with my biological dad (and if he dies first my stepmum will inherit everything anyway).

I think it entirely deoends on how you view your stepchild. Are they your husband/wife's child, or are they yours too? If you consider them yours i don;t understand why you're treat them any differently from your biological children. Id feel very hurt if i was treated differently, i'd feel rejected as a daughter. The mo ey wouldn;t matter but to know my dad doesn;t view me as his daugter when i've always seen him as my dad would hurt a lot.

JReacher1

Do what you feel best. By the time anyone finds out you'll be dead so you'll probably have bigger things to worry abut!

brighterhue

If your estate is large enough to incur inheritance tax you might want to consider leaving 10% to charity as it means a reduction in the rate of inheritance tax paid. I notice almost all the replies only mention leaving money to children!

Even if not it might be a time when you can give more generously than during your life.

chesky

I think it's almost heartless not to leave a stepchild ANYTHING. I don't mean a heap of money, but to not mention them at all in your will seems mean. Even if it's only a piece of jewellery or a picture, or a thousand pounds (depending on the size of the estate).